heropup saidUnless you are fully prepared for the worst possible outcome, do not come out.
I realize you want to get this burden off your chest, but you need to think carefully about how your family could react. What are the possible outcomes--not just the most likely outcome--and how well could you cope with their reaction? For example, if the worst you think they'd do is kick you out, are you ready to be kicked out? Do you have a place to go? Are you self sufficient? Are your possessions gathered?
If the worst they might do is physically harm you, then you better not tell them by yourself. Get a trusted friend to be there or send a letter.
If the worst they might do is cry and give you a hard time, then are you ready for dealing with that change in your relationship with them? It could be years...if ever...before they can come to an understanding.
There are so many ways this could go down. Are you sure you are ready for it? You might never see them again, for example. It may be overwhelming to think of and prepare for all the bad ways this could turn out, and in many cases this is what causes so many guys to not come out at all, but usually the first step in coming out to others is to tell those people who you believe will support you and are capable of expressing that support when you need it. You need to collect allies on your side. Then you work toward harder cases.
Some very good points in this posting. You need to prepare yourself for the worst and hope for the best. The old saying 'The only thing to fear is fear itself' is applicable here. Those fears will never go away, not tomorrow nor the next day. The chance of losing all your family will always exist, today and tomorrow. You can't change how others react or what they believe, you can only prepare yourself in a way that you can continually better yourself, with or without them. Be prepared to go it alone, have your ducks in a row, ensure you have the best support system you can ever imagine. Then when you feel the time is right, when you've gone beyond where you're willing to live with the lies, when you're willing to risk it all because the alternative of living a new life, perhaps alone, is better than living the lies with people who really may not unconditionally love you, then you will be prepared to move forward.
Rome was not built in a day, think this one through and always, always, know part of your support system is right here! Big HUGS!!!!