Internalized Homophobia

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:12 PM GMT
    Apologies if this has been started before.


    For me i actually think i do suffer from this icon_sad.gif

    So..... Open discussion !
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:14 PM GMT
    Are You saying that You are Yourself homophobic?

    It is probably not all that uncommon - being able to recognize it is the first and most major step in overcoming it!!!

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:17 PM GMT
    most of this forum suffers from it also icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:25 PM GMT
    Cash saidAre You saying that You are Yourself homophobic?

    It is probably not all that uncommon - being able to recognize it is the first and most major step in overcoming it!!!

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif
    Not against others but i do feel that i am not totally relaxed with it icon_sad.gif
  • tj85016

    Posts: 4123

    May 16, 2014 5:26 PM GMT
    it's called masked self-loathing, get over it
  • Karl

    Posts: 5787

    May 16, 2014 5:28 PM GMT
    blah blah blah blah
    you are just who you are
    one day you'll have gone far
    never care about homophobia

    lol
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    May 16, 2014 5:30 PM GMT
    It's very common and gets acted out in a variety of ways. Avoidance is one -- but using other men as cum buckets is another. I could even go so far as to say that being *used* as a cum bucket is yet another expression of it. But all this gets into psychological motivations that vary from person to person and no one can really say what drives us to avoid the things we do or alternately enjoy or do the things we do.

    It's a concept. It can be useful for understanding ourselves and hopefully making changes that make our lives more easy going and enjoyable.
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    May 16, 2014 5:31 PM GMT
    owl_bundy said
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    icon_rolleyes.gif i hate when people say shit like this.

    have you ever got over your own internalize homophobia?
    Thankyou so much !!! I didnt like that either and i am sick of people telling me and others to get over it i wanted this thread to be a discussion on the topic not me spilling my crap, why say anything at all if thats all there was to say ???
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:41 PM GMT
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    Oh is THAT what one is supposed to do???

    Thank GOD You stopped by with THAT pearl of street savvy wisdom.

    To think the Middle East peace process is stumbling along when You have such wisdom right at Yer fingertips!!!

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:43 PM GMT
    maybe tell yourself:

    gay bi or straight not a lot of differences in how a relationship works.

    no ones business what your sexuality is but i am sure its not a moral issue, you are not the lesser person. The same sex marriage laws in the UK (where the OP is from) are certainly affirming.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:44 PM GMT
    This thread was mean to be a discussion about the subject with me saying i feel i still have some in me against the entirety of me being gay and or not hetro, but if who ever wants to post here feel free but if you just want to be simple minded and or non constructive at all when i'm being serious about a matter then FUCK RIGHT OFF!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:44 PM GMT
    pellaz saidmaybe tell yourself:

    gay bi or straight not a lot of differences in how a relationship works.

    no ones business what your sexuality is but i am sure its not a moral issue, you are not the lesser person. The same sex marriage laws in the UK (where the OP is from) are certainly affirming.
    Thankyou !
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:45 PM GMT
    owl_bundy said
    LordDennis said
    owl_bundy said
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    icon_rolleyes.gif i hate when people say shit like this.

    have you ever got over your own internalize homophobia?
    Thankyou so much !!! I didnt like that either and i am sick of people telling me and others to get over it i wanted this thread to be a discussion on the topic not me spilling my crap, why say anything at all if thats all there was to say ???


    for real... shit is wild annoying. they act as if they don't have the same issue when that shit is as clear as day. icon_lol.gif
    Cheers !
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:47 PM GMT
    owl_bundy said
    talknerdy2me saidmost of this forum suffers from it also icon_lol.gif


    this. dennis, most lgbtq folks have this problem because they were raised in a society that was told that it's wrong to be lgbtq. even when people acknowledge, accept who they are and come out to others, it still is present in their lives where they constantly have to fight that shit because the influences are always there. one of the ways to fight against homophobia is through education. knowing gay history seeing how normal it is in humanity like heterosexuality is.


    Solid gold.

    Thanks Owl.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:48 PM GMT
    You know what fuck it now END OF THREAD
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:49 PM GMT
    LordDennis saidThis thread was mean to be a discussion about the subject with me saying i feel i still have some in me against the entirety of me being gay and or not hetro, but if who ever wants to post here feel free but if you just want to be simple minded and or non constructive at all when i'm being serious about a matter then FUCK RIGHT OFF!!!!!!!!!!!


    *LIKING THIS*

    Dennis, don't stop learning how to ride a bike just because the odd person tries to poke a stick in the spokes. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:50 PM GMT
    Hey, have you read the books Velvet Rage, The Gifts of Imperfection and Daring Greatly? I recommend them.

    http://www.amazon.ca/The-Velvet-Rage-Overcoming-Straight/dp/0738215678

    http://www.amazon.ca/The-Gifts-Imperfection-Supposed-Embrace/dp/159285849X/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_b

    http://www.amazon.ca/Daring-Greatly-Courage-Vulnerable-Transforms/dp/1592407331/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1400262567&sr=1-1&keywords=daring+greatly
  • Eli_jah

    Posts: 1391

    May 16, 2014 5:53 PM GMT
    Yes most gay people suffer from some kind of mental illness (PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc) just living as a gay person in the world. Even if they don't know it.

    Therapy helps.
  • tj85016

    Posts: 4123

    May 16, 2014 5:53 PM GMT
    Cash said
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    Oh is THAT what one is supposed to do???

    Thank GOD You stopped by with THAT pearl of street savvy wisdom.

    To think the Middle East peace process is stumbling along when You have such wisdom right at Yer fingertips!!!

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif


    sure, no problem, now go see a shrink, I can't help it it you hate yourself - owl bundy this applies to you also
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    May 16, 2014 5:53 PM GMT
    LordDennis saidYou know what fuck it now END OF THREAD
    LOL, unfortunately it doesn't work that way. Start a thread and it goes its way, not ours! On one hand it can be maddening, on the other it is kind of fascinating and verifies an observation I have about life: We can predict within a certain range what is going to happen next, but never *exactly* what is going to happen. Getting things to turn out "the way I want" is an art that consists in large measure of learning to appreciate the way things turn out. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:55 PM GMT
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    Then you'd better come up with some nasty insults for me, too. You're off base with this comment, unconstructive and unkind as well.



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:56 PM GMT
    LordDennis saidYou know what fuck it now END OF THREAD


    It's a good and worthy topic Dennis.

    Don't jump off the ride just because it is a little bumpy.

    You never know who may read this - and discover they really NEEDED to read it.

    Words are power. Don't abandon power.

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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 16, 2014 5:57 PM GMT
    tj85016 said
    Cash said
    tj85016 saidit's called masked self-loathing, get over it


    Oh is THAT what one is supposed to do???

    Thank GOD You stopped by with THAT pearl of street savvy wisdom.

    To think the Middle East peace process is stumbling along when You have such wisdom right at Yer fingertips!!!

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif


    sure, no problem, now go see a shrink, I can't help it it you hate yourself - owl bundy this applies to you also

    I realize you're a troll, but I'll try this anyway.

    Suggesting that someone seek therapy is worthwhile advice.

    Suggesting someone "get over it" is not worthwhile advice.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    May 16, 2014 6:00 PM GMT
    Cash said
    LordDennis saidYou know what fuck it now END OF THREAD


    It's a good and worthy topic Dennis.

    Don't jump off the ride just because it is a little bumpy.

    You never know who may read this - and discover they really NEEDED to read it.

    Words are power. Don't abandon power.

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif

    Hell, people PAY for bumpy rides!
    roller-coaster.jpg
  • tj85016

    Posts: 4123

    May 16, 2014 6:00 PM GMT
    ^^

    I'm not a troll, seeking therapy helps you get over it, that's the point. Any homophobic homosexual is self-loathing - you just want some sugar-coated nonsense explaination that says it's healthy, it's not