Lesbian cities

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2014 4:24 PM GMT
    Reading this article:

    http://www.durhammag.com/arts-style/how-we-became-the-lesbian-haven-of-the-south/

    Had me thinking about the type of city that attracts Lesbians versus gay men. In particular this comment:

    "But there’s one thing that’s especially notable about Durham’s gay community: it tilts heavily in the female direction. Durham is, by many people’s estimation, a “lesbian city” rather than a “gay city.” Or, as Gumbs puts it: “It’s more of a potluck city than a nightclub city.”

    “It’s been true for a long time that there are more lesbians in Durham and more gay men in Raleigh,” says Ian Palmquist, executive director of Equality North Carolina."

    Asheville is another place known as a lesbian haven "A she vile". In the northeast while gay men flocked to Boston and. New. York, Northhampton Ma was known as a lesbian destinations. I was always a bit envious that they had such a beautiful place to live so close to skiing. I have a similar feeling about Asheville. I also have to admit that I am more attracted to the vibe of lesbian destinations over many of the gay ones. They don't have ghettos but their presence makes a place more accepting to all homosexuals.

    Now here's another interesting comment from the article:

    Graves gives a surprising theory about why Durham is so popular with lesbians: affordable real estate. “We’re nesters – you know the whole lesbian U-Haul thing,” she says, referring to the old joke about lesbians’ stereotypical eagerness for commitment. (What does a lesbian bring to a second date? A U-Haul.)

    Graves echoes Gumbs’ sentiment about Durham being more about potlucks, less about nightclubs. “Lesbians don’t want to go to Raleigh and hang out in the meat markets,” she says, referring to Raleigh’s gay nightclub scene.

    If a gay man has to move to NC he is more likely to choose Raleigh or Charlotte because bigger is always better. There is no Atlanta or DC in the state and Raleigh and Charlotte pale compare to any of the other large world class cities gay men prefer so why do they choose these two corporate cities over the more progressive smaller cities like Durham and Asheville? I think the answer goes back to that Uhaul joke.
  • carew28

    Posts: 661

    May 21, 2014 8:24 PM GMT
    I have some fond memories of Northampton the way it was 25 years ago. I never lived there, but I often visited. There was a large lesbian community there, I think partly because it had Smith College (plenty of activist lesbians there), plus it was within commuting distance of other large colleges. The very early lesbian community there (in the 70s and 80s) were actually lesbian separatists who hated men, and wanted to live independently from them. But other than that, they were okay. They established their own co-operative households, and were pretty self-sufficient, working-class women. Then as time went by, the lesbian community became mostly young college graduates just starting out, as well as older blue-collar women. The lesbian community grew quickly, and as time went by, it became more and more conventional and affluent. There's still a large lesbian community in Northampton, but the city's become so expensive that it's now a wealthy, professional, lesbian community.

    Pretty much the same thing happened to Provincetown, only with gay men. Back in the 70s, you could go there for a weekend at the beach. You didn't even have to have advance reservations. You could always find a little rooming-house to stay in for maybe $25 per night, if you couldn't afford the fancier, more expensive places. It was a great place to go sightseeing, spend time on the beach, make gay friends, etc. You could also find a summer job in a restaurant, if you wanted to stay for a couple of weeks. Not anymore. The prices have gone through the roof. It's still a vacation destination for affluent gay guys, of all ages, who can afford it. But the atmosphere has changed. I suppose it was inevitable, as the gay communities everywhere have become more conventional and affluent. But I liked it better in the old days.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 21, 2014 9:06 PM GMT
    “It’s been true for a long time that there are more lesbians in Durham and more gay men in Raleigh,” says Ian Palmquist, executive director of Equality North Carolina. The 2000 census shows 442 lesbian households in Durham, versus only 316 gay male households, statistics which Palmquist says likely under-represent the true numbers."

    It could be true that there are more lesbians than gay men in Durham, but Palmquist is in error if he thinks you can come to that conclusion based on that census statistic. Only gays and lesbians who were in relationships were counted as gay or lesbians in the census. If you were a single lesbian or gay man, you were not counted. Lesbians are more often in relationships that gay men and in states with marriage equality lesbians marry more often than gay men and usually it is a lot more.
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    May 22, 2014 2:39 AM GMT
    carew28 said....... and as time went by, it became more and more conventional and affluent. There's still a large lesbian community in Northampton, but the city's become so expensive that it's now a wealthy, professional, lesbian community.

    Pretty much the same thing happened to Provincetown, only with gay men. ......The prices have gone through the roof. It's still a vacation destination for affluent gay guys, of all ages, who can afford it. But the atmosphere has changed. I suppose it was inevitable, as the gay communities everywhere have become more conventional and affluent. But I liked it better in the old days.



    And the same thing is happening in Asheville.