How should we tackle bullying?

  • 1AlanZSky

    Posts: 1505

    May 20, 2014 10:32 PM GMT
    http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2014/05/02/study-two-thirds-of-gay-teens-have-considered-suicide-while-80-are-bullied/comments/#disqus_thread

    The right way to tackle bullying is to raise awareness of gay people. They exist. As a community we can help each other in a POSITIVE way. Think about how we can help others. Heal people and help others feel they are worth something. They can create and improve society. They can be singers, scientists and maybe even web designers. They can be lawyers and earn lots of money. They can do so much. Alan Turing was a pioneer of computing. Think of what he could have achieved had he continued to live.

    Life is worth living and we need to think about LIFE. What we can achieve as people. We have gay teens who think about suicide and self-harming. We can help others beat these bullies and think about helping other people. It becomes a cycle if we continue thinking negatively. Even one thing that has made you happy, think about that happy thought. Looking at the sunset...



    I will not let people think about death and suicide because that is depressing. Maybe we can't help it. But think of that lonely gay teenager who needs you. He or she is lonely and probably has no-one to turn to. If you are gone, who is going to help another gay teen? We all need each other and we can help others.

    Maybe you think your life is not worth living. But it is. Your struggles help you do better in life. You have better experiences on how to deal with these struggles.

    It can get better and it may get worse, but you are not alone and we will beat these bullies. Life is not perfect and the things we learn will help us become better human beings.

    LIFE IS WORTH LIVING and we can help people.

    We must stop bullying.
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    May 20, 2014 10:42 PM GMT
    I never told my parents or teachers I was being bullied. I knew if I did, their next question would be to ask me "why?" Then I would have had to tell them it was because I was gay, and I knew that wouldn't go over very well. As long as parents think being gay is a "sin", bullying will continue.
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    May 20, 2014 10:57 PM GMT
    Anyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.
  • Rhi_Bran

    Posts: 904

    May 20, 2014 10:59 PM GMT
    We can stop treating schools like edu-factories. Smaller class sizes, or more smaller schools, would make it easier to take notice of and do something about bullying. I lived in a small town for five years and believe me when everyone knows everyone, there is less drive to form cliques, more reason to stick together, and if someone gets wronged, everybody knows. Especially those with authority (teachers).
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    May 20, 2014 11:04 PM GMT
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    I was abused by my dad at home and abused by kids at school, therefore I had a very low self esteem. Although your advice sounds great from an outsider's perspective, it's just not realistic to expect a kid who thinks he's worthless to stand up for himself. Kids have to have at least some degree of self confidence instilled in them to stand up to their bullies.
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    May 20, 2014 11:14 PM GMT
    Scruffy and Owl, you got a point there but I was at the other end of the problem so I can certainly tell you how to STOP a bully, but I dont know how a bullied kid might gain confidence to fight back.
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    May 20, 2014 11:15 PM GMT
    Scruffypup said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    I was abused by my dad at home and abused by kids at school, therefore I had a very low self esteem. Although your advice sounds great from an outsider's perspective, it's just not realistic to expect a kid who thinks he's worthless to stand up for himself. Kids have to have at least some degree of self confidence instilled in them to stand up to their bullies.


    Yep. Blaming the victim behavior is just a subtler form of bulling.
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    May 20, 2014 11:16 PM GMT
    OP:
    Are you my future husband?.. 5.gif
    Can we have babies together? cause I want to have babies with you...* in daze..now..105.gif


    Okay on a serious Note:

    *beautiful thread ever made on RJ

    2. Tracked.

    3. and as you said raise awareness of gay people. Cultivate people of knowing by themselves of all the simple basic sense in knowing what's Good and Right in the very dept of sensibility.

    I believe from there on, in fact in all beings they do know deep inside of what is purity, and what's equally means in all compassion towards one another. Not for the sake of being influence by the simple nature that goes around simply as to stereotype, but! being able to stand on their own to cultivate such practice in realization on what beauty is there to live with serenity of harmonies in Life.

    ♥ Har.
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    May 20, 2014 11:17 PM GMT
    minox said
    Scruffypup said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.

    I was abused by my dad at home and abused by kids at school, therefore I had a very low self esteem. Although your advice sounds great from an outsider's perspective, it's just not realistic to expect a kid who thinks he's worthless to stand up for himself. Kids have to have at least some degree of self confidence instilled in them to stand up to their bullies.

    Yep. Blaming the victim behavior is just a subtler form of bulling.

    I wasnt blaming the victims behavior at all. Im saying what it takes to deal with bullies thats all. Of course its not the victims fault to have low self esteem.
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    May 20, 2014 11:20 PM GMT
    David3K saidScruffy and Owl, you got a point there but I was at the other end of the problem so I can certainly tell you how to STOP a bully, but I dont know how a bullied kid might gain confidence to fight back.


    Yeah I understand where you were coming from now. Just letting you know why it's not always possible to fight back. Plus, there were often 6 or more guys attacking me at once.
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    May 20, 2014 11:24 PM GMT
    *eats popcorns and pizzas in this order*
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    May 20, 2014 11:26 PM GMT
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    Completely agree.

    A true bully is actually somebody who is fundamentally dealing with their own issues and weaknesses, and instead of recognizing and dealing with their own issues, are projecting their anger about their own internal conflict on to those that seem to occupy a position of inferior status and power.

    The way to stop them (IMO) is to challenge their behavior. Address them either in a direct conversation, report them if it's at school/work, or, if they are the physical type of bully, and it is possible, a physical counteraction.

    Most bullies don't want to have to deal with negative blow-back, they prefer somebody who is an easy target who will not cause them any trouble.

    Don't allow yourself to remain an easy target, in whichever way you feel is best, would be my advice.
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    May 20, 2014 11:27 PM GMT
    _SAGE_ said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    Completely agree.

    A true bully is actually somebody who is fundamentally dealing with their own issues and weaknesses, and instead of recognizing and dealing with their own issues, projecting their anger or hurt on those that seem to occupy a position of inferior status.

    The way to stop them is to challenge their behavior, address with them either in a direct conversation, report them if it's at school/work, or, if they are the physical type of bully, and it is possible, a physical counteraction.

    Most bullies don't want to have to deal with negative blow-back, they prefer somebody who is an easy target who will not cause them any trouble.

    Don't allow yourself to remain an easy target, in whichever way you feel is best, would be my advice.


    Yes until the crazy bully comes with a knife or a gun.
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    May 20, 2014 11:28 PM GMT
    KXD7 said
    _SAGE_ said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    Completely agree.

    A true bully is actually somebody who is fundamentally dealing with their own issues and weaknesses, and instead of recognizing and dealing with their own issues, projecting their anger or hurt on those that seem to occupy a position of inferior status.

    The way to stop them is to challenge their behavior, address with them either in a direct conversation, report them if it's at school/work, or, if they are the physical type of bully, and it is possible, a physical counteraction.

    Most bullies don't want to have to deal with negative blow-back, they prefer somebody who is an easy target who will not cause them any trouble.

    Don't allow yourself to remain an easy target, in whichever way you feel is best, would be my advice.


    Yes until the crazy bully comes with a knife or a gun.


    Call the po-po. That's what they are there for.
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    May 20, 2014 11:32 PM GMT
    _SAGE_ said
    KXD7 said
    _SAGE_ said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    Completely agree.

    A true bully is actually somebody who is fundamentally dealing with their own issues and weaknesses, and instead of recognizing and dealing with their own issues, projecting their anger or hurt on those that seem to occupy a position of inferior status.

    The way to stop them is to challenge their behavior, address with them either in a direct conversation, report them if it's at school/work, or, if they are the physical type of bully, and it is possible, a physical counteraction.

    Most bullies don't want to have to deal with negative blow-back, they prefer somebody who is an easy target who will not cause them any trouble.

    Don't allow yourself to remain an easy target, in whichever way you feel is best, would be my advice.


    Yes until the crazy bully comes with a knife or a gun.


    Call the po-po. That's what they are there for.



    lol po-po. I love the words you always use Sage. icon_lol.gif
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    May 20, 2014 11:35 PM GMT
    Scruffypup said
    David3K saidScruffy and Owl, you got a point there but I was at the other end of the problem so I can certainly tell you how to STOP a bully, but I dont know how a bullied kid might gain confidence to fight back.


    Yeah I understand where you were coming from now. Just letting you know why it's not always possible to fight back. Plus, there were often 6 or more guys attacking me at once.

    When I was young my uncle would beat me up and wouldn't give me money to buy food. I am by NO MEANS justifying the bully behavior, it's horrible, all I'm saying is bully kids come from fucked up backgrounds most of the time too. Maybe what's needed are adults who step up and try to help them both.
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    May 20, 2014 11:42 PM GMT
    I work in a school and bullies tend to pick on those who are not able to defend themselves. If they act weird or strange they will be bullied. Nerds get bullied sometimes. Gay teens most likely get bullied.

    One way to solve it is to tell teachers, but they are scared. I know of one boy who is big physically but his personality is somewhat strange and weird. He gets bullied so I try to "educate" the bully. If the teacher is anti-gay, what do you do then? It comes down to parents as well.

    So yeah, gay people do exist and people are different. Not many teens are diplomatic or neutral and they tend to form groups. Raise awareness and continue to teach about tolerance and difference.
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    May 20, 2014 11:43 PM GMT
    KXD7 said
    _SAGE_ said
    KXD7 said
    _SAGE_ said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.


    Completely agree.

    A true bully is actually somebody who is fundamentally dealing with their own issues and weaknesses, and instead of recognizing and dealing with their own issues, projecting their anger or hurt on those that seem to occupy a position of inferior status.

    The way to stop them is to challenge their behavior, address with them either in a direct conversation, report them if it's at school/work, or, if they are the physical type of bully, and it is possible, a physical counteraction.

    Most bullies don't want to have to deal with negative blow-back, they prefer somebody who is an easy target who will not cause them any trouble.

    Don't allow yourself to remain an easy target, in whichever way you feel is best, would be my advice.


    Yes until the crazy bully comes with a knife or a gun.


    Call the po-po. That's what they are there for.



    lol po-po. I love the words you always use Sage. icon_lol.gif


    I'm glad you enjoy them too ..

    post-11774-Don-Draper-wink-gif-Z8wr.gif
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    May 20, 2014 11:45 PM GMT
    ^ lol icon_lol.gif
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    May 20, 2014 11:52 PM GMT
    David3K said
    Scruffypup said
    David3K saidScruffy and Owl, you got a point there but I was at the other end of the problem so I can certainly tell you how to STOP a bully, but I dont know how a bullied kid might gain confidence to fight back.


    Yeah I understand where you were coming from now. Just letting you know why it's not always possible to fight back. Plus, there were often 6 or more guys attacking me at once.

    When I was young I was living with my uncle that would beat me up and wouldn't give me money to buy food. I am by NO MEANS defending the bully behavior, it's horrible. All I'm saying is bully kids come from fucked up backgrounds most of the time as well. Maybe what's needed are adults who step up and try to help them both.


    It's interesting to hear it from the other side of the coin. Genuinely though I don't believe every bully has a hard up bringing. Some bullies just have that in their personality.

    Personally I think bullying is a problem that will never vet sorted. I've experienced and witnessed just as much bullying in the work place and in adult relationships than I did in schools.
  • Pheo

    Posts: 198

    May 20, 2014 11:57 PM GMT
    1285pytk saidI work in a school and bullies tend to pick on those who are not able to defend themselves. If they act weird or strange they will be bullied. Nerds get bullied sometimes. Gay teens most likely get bullied.

    One way to solve it is to tell teachers, but they are scared. I know of one boy who is big physically but his personality is somewhat strange and weird. He gets bullied so I try to "educate" the bully. If the teacher is anti-gay, what do you do then? It comes down to parents as well.

    So yeah, gay people do exist and people are different. Not many teens are diplomatic or neutral and they tend to form groups. Raise awareness and continue to teach about tolerance and difference.


    This. Not only that, people have to remember that it's a taught behavior. Kids see their parents all the time commenting about how "Oh I don't like that person because of this" while jabbering on the phone with someone else. Or it could be with their spouse. They pick up on things like that at a very early age. Sometimes it's more heinous than that though. Where the bully is subjected to bullying at home, accused of being gay because they're not like them, or their brother, or sister. I think that the faculty should be more involved in things like this to find the root of the problem.
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    May 21, 2014 12:02 AM GMT
    I've found that bullying is usually from people that have problems in their life or have shortcomings. I've seen it all from 60 something drunk thugs at ball games and short, fat guatemalan dudes in their cadallac escalades that don't know how to think.
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    May 21, 2014 2:11 AM GMT
    Scruffypup saidI never told my parents or teachers I was being bullied. I knew if I did, their next question would be to ask me "why?" Then I would have had to tell them it was because I was gay, and I knew that wouldn't go over very well. As long as parents think being gay is a "sin", bullying will continue.

    QFT.

    But also, as long as parents and teachers think bullying isn't a big deal, bullying will continue.

    David3K said
    minox said
    Scruffypup said
    David3K saidAnyone whos being bullied need to stand up for themselves and fight back, that's only way to get respect from bullies. What attract bullies is not physical appearances but weakness on the bullied personality.

    I was abused by my dad at home and abused by kids at school, therefore I had a very low self esteem. Although your advice sounds great from an outsider's perspective, it's just not realistic to expect a kid who thinks he's worthless to stand up for himself. Kids have to have at least some degree of self confidence instilled in them to stand up to their bullies.

    Yep. Blaming the victim behavior is just a subtler form of bulling.

    I wasnt blaming the victims behavior at all. Im saying what it takes to deal with bullies thats all. Of course its not the victims fault to have low self esteem.

    For those who don't recall, David started a thread about his efforts to make amends to someone he bullied in school. It didn't turn out so well, but David's perspective is valuable here. How often do you get advice from a former bully on how to defeat bullies?
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    May 21, 2014 2:23 AM GMT
    We need to teach our children that it gets better when you kick a bully in the face when he's down on the ground.
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    May 21, 2014 4:01 AM GMT
    1AlanZSky saidHow should we tackle bullying?
    Killing the bullies would be a great start, or at least castrating them so they can't reproduce.