Just broke up with a guy after 6 months. Now what?

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    Jan 06, 2009 2:28 AM GMT
    Yeah I know probably narcissistic of me to do this but just broke up and it wasn't because of anything bad, just that I had a totally different idea to what was going on.

    It hurts, it damn well hurts. You meet the right guy but it's like your still from totally different worlds and even though it feels like it's working you have this small feeling in the back of your mind it isn't.

    I just keep telling myself look after me and I guess that's all I can do. Any other suggestions?

  • Thirdbeach

    Posts: 1364

    Jan 06, 2009 3:09 AM GMT
    Be depressed for a few days.

    Have a rebound fling (i.e. liltanker).

    Meet someone new, start dating again.

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    Jan 06, 2009 3:22 AM GMT
    Yeah probably a good idea actually. I think an arvo at the pub with friends is in order.
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    Jan 06, 2009 3:39 AM GMT
    Thirdbeach saidBe depressed for a few days.

    Have a rebound fling (i.e. liltanker).

    Meet someone new, start dating again.


    Agreed. The best way to get over an old love is with a new love.
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    Jan 06, 2009 3:54 AM GMT
    Tell you what though it was just the best thing ever then when you get to a point where you say where is this going and they can't give you a straight answer, that's what really tells you this isn't working.

    Crazy thing is maybe I should have picked up on it earlier, I don't know. But I guess it's healing time for a little while then work out whats next.

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    Jan 06, 2009 4:21 AM GMT
    Thirdbeach saidHave a rebound fling (i.e. liltanker).
    well damn, I've been volunteered for many things before, but never that hahaha

    I thought a fling was suppose to be fun and exciting, don't wanna kill the poor bugger, hes hurting enough as it is.

    Mate, sometimes, things don't go as we'd have hoped, its a right bitch when it happens, but when one thing leaves a new opportunity tends to find you..

    But, Thirdbeach makes a point, go have fun, go live life and forget him.
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    Jan 06, 2009 4:22 AM GMT
    Thirdbeach saidBe depressed for a few days.

    Have a rebound fling (i.e. liltanker).

    Meet someone new, start dating again.


    you know , basically he's right! An liltanker damn who wouldn't want to fling with him...he's hot!

    ...seriously move on. Take a look at your routine and make it about you now. Assert the goodness in you. So see some one a counselor or a psychiatrist to work things out in your mind. Nothing wrong in getting that kind of help as it will help you ease back into a groove that YOU choose and that is YOU!!! right now to heal....its all about you. Take it and run with it...good luck. RV
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    Jan 06, 2009 4:36 AM GMT
    Thanks guys I really appreciate it. It's good to know there are some very supportive friends out there. And don't worry lilTanker, your just as much a great friend right now icon_smile.gif


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    Jan 06, 2009 5:47 AM GMT
    Time.

    In a world of 7 billion folks, you'll meet another.

    As time goes on, your viewpoint on your prior relationship will change.

    End the self-pity today, remember the good, dump the rest, and find someone better. Just how life is.
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    Jan 06, 2009 5:48 AM GMT
    REBOUND ACTION!!! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jan 06, 2009 5:53 AM GMT
    I agree with the above. I can sympothyze with you dude, I know how hard it can be, but take my word for it, it gets easier soon enough. I was in a relationship for about 2 years and was getting ready to move in with the guy and walked in on him one day having sex with someone else. I drove home and called my mom to have someone to talk to and inadvertently came out to her and she hung up on me. It happened 3 years ago and I'm not completely over it even now and it was by far one of the worst nights I can recall in my life. So if I can get through all that happened that night after being with him for 2 years, you shouldn't have too many problems getting over 6 months of dating. Just be thankful it wasn't longer dude.
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    Jan 06, 2009 5:53 AM GMT
    flex210 saidTime.

    In a world of 7 billion folks, you'll meet another.

    As time goes on, your viewpoint on your prior relationship will change.

    End the self-pity today, remember the good, dump the rest, and find someone better. Just how life is.


    You know sometimes it's like even out of those 7 billion that person does not exist. i really thought this was it. Someone tolerant, patient, knowledgeable. He literally was the right package. And if that fails what actually works?

    But there's no self pity. It wasn't a bad breakup. Just that he is somewhere else and can't commit. I have to say I was kind of thrown around a bit from time to time and just ignored it trying to just "make it work" but I just felt it became too much effort.

    But yeah, move on!

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    Jan 06, 2009 5:55 AM GMT
    you listen to Jimmy Eat World's "In the Middle" and dive back into the game
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    Jan 06, 2009 5:58 AM GMT
    you just wallow for a day, and be like fuck it, i'm worth more.

    then get all dressed up and go out and about.
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    Jan 06, 2009 6:44 AM GMT
    JETSETTER9 saidkeep in yourself busy go to the gym. Go out and have fun. Go out on a date and eventually you will forget about him. Dont' e-mail or text him


    I 2nd that!
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    Jan 06, 2009 4:10 PM GMT
    Stuart Smalley comes to mind...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvgMIerTXl4
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    Jan 06, 2009 4:13 PM GMT
    Simply, get back to you!
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    Jan 06, 2009 4:47 PM GMT
    That small feeling in the back of your mind that things aren't working is your gut feeling, and you were wise to listen to that. Always listen to it.

    Go to bed, cover yourself with the sheets....cry....hit the pillows.....curse life in general......curse him and yourself...........go to sleep.

    If you don't feel better the next day, call a good friend of yours and make plans to have a few drinks later on at night. If he is a good friend, he will let you blab and babble about your broken heart, and the next day he will be cool enough not to talk about it........

    Then get a haircut. and get your self pitying crying ass back out there in the real world.
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    Jan 06, 2009 5:23 PM GMT
    Get over it yeah, but don't ignore that small feeling in the back of your mind. It's there for a reason so you should figure out just why it's there and how that factors into what you are looking for when dating. Is it something about you or was there something about him that just didn't feel right to you even if you couldn't put your finger on exactly what?
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    Jan 09, 2009 2:35 AM GMT
    Shortnsexystud saidGet over it yeah, but don't ignore that small feeling in the back of your mind. It's there for a reason so you should figure out just why it's there and how that factors into what you are looking for when dating. Is it something about you or was there something about him that just didn't feel right to you even if you couldn't put your finger on exactly what?


    It wasn't about me at all. I admit my life travels at warp speed but I have the patience to step back and let events unfold. I even had to tell a few friends that we hadn't reached bf status even after 8 months of dating. But it just frustrated me especially when even his friends keep telling me it will never last cause he is never in the same place for more than 6 months.

    For me it was considered a bump along the journey, but it's not something you can ignore or fix.

    At the end of the day I guess I had to hear it from him about where it was going and he never really had the guts to actually tell me without prompting.