A lot of dudes not only get annoyed if one of their friends finds a boyfriend but they also wish they could split so that their friend comes back to them. What the fuck? I mean, why complain about your friend being happy with his BF? They are a couple duh. They don't always have to hangout with you. Anyway, have any of you seen this situation or experienced it?
Let me give you a variant of this, if I understand you correctly.
When I started dating my husband he took me to parties and gatherings with his gay friends. And also with his family members living or visiting in this area. He's out to family so being gay wasn't an issue.
And I immediately sensed his friends "circling the wagons" against me, to protect him. Who'd had some bad experiences with guys he'd met in the past, as he told me himself.
Well, OK, I've been in this situation before. I was really beginning to fall in love with this guy, wanted to win him over. And as before in other realtionships, I knew that the way to a guy's heart must include family & friends. Win THEM and you win HIM.
Versus guys who try to isolate a lover from their old life, their family & friends, as I've seen happen. Something I think is a horribly selfish approach, unethical, and often in the long run, sowing the seeds for unhappiness & failure.
Well anyway, I won his friends over. And his family, too. He often jokes he thinks his family & friends like me more than they do him (NOT true).
Afterwards when we became partners I shared all this with him. And told him his wary & protective friends only made me love him more, by making me realize what a special guy he is. A guy with friends who think that much of him, worry about him, love him, has to be someone of great worth.
A guy isn't protected that much by his friends for nothing. Not out of selfish possessive reasons I sensed in his case, but out of love and deep concern. Meaning his friends weren't obstacles to me, they were opportunities, and potential allies & friends of my own.
Later I also told his friends this, actually used the phrase "circling the wagons". They all agreed and said that was exactly what they were doing. My instincts were correct. They'd seen him hurt before, and wouldn't allow it to happen again. I complimented them on their loyalty, said it made me realize what genuine friends to him they are. And I meant it.
Now we're all great friends, go to each other's homes all the time. You may have seen some of their pics I posted of the gay polo tournament we all attended a few months ago. In fact, today they thank me for being with him, and jokingly call me "Saint Robert" for "putting up with him". And my husband laughs along, too.