Fed Up with "Dating" Apps -Where Do You Find Guys Who Actually Want to Date?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 1:13 AM GMT
    I'm noticing a pattern with guys on dating apps, online saying sites- most are looking for hookups or are wishy washy about dating or if they are interested in dating their expectations are way out of line and they are looking for the "perfect" guy. Who doesn't exist...

    I met 2 guys on Tinder; one seems a little off and is coming up with excuses for pushing our first "date" (his texts say the opposite) tomorrow. I'm thinking of canceling to avoid disappointment

    The other guy I hooked up and broke my no hookup rule since he was a masc jock type who seemed and was down to earth. Fun but I'd like to actually date a guy like him :/ I'm thinking of deleting Tinder which seems like a not so thinly veiled version of Grindr for "busy" young professionals.

    Meeting guys in real life had been difficult. People say volunteer to met quality guys but a lot of people who seem to volunteer are older retirees. There's Meetup but that's not really good for getting dates. Social groups and organizations have entrance fees which can add up; I'm just seeking a low pressure down to earth environment.

    I'm almost ready to throw in the towel on finding a guy in NYC; a lot of young gay guys are focused on hooking up or are dependent on these "dating" sites to hookup.

    Has anyone had success meeting people online?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 27, 2014 1:18 AM GMT
    empty_pockets.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 1:25 AM GMT
    Dating online sucks. Unless you're a 10 or a slutty bottom, you're not gonna get much use out of dating sites or smartphone apps.

    If you're religious, go to church. If you're not, then join a social group. Meet new people and get to know them. Don't try to meet people for dating. That's where you'll fail. Become friends first. You may click with someone. Or maybe they know someone that would be interested in dating you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 1:31 AM GMT
    Try dating in real life instead.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 2:58 AM GMT
    This is kinda old. But still funny.

    "Everything That's Wrong With Gay Dating Apps in One Extended Profile"

    PERFECTGUY4SAME...

    No fats, no fems, no PNP, no one over 30, no face=no chat, no BS, NSA, no blacks, no Asians (nothing personal, I just think you guys are trolls). If you act gay, no chat. DDF, non-smoker, HIV-neg as of five minutes ago, into Random Play. If you think you're VGL you're probably not. Mixed here. No chat before you send more photos. No husband no wife, no boyfriend, no phonies. Say more than "hi" if you want me to respond. Find me on Instagram. No F-buddies. I'm not interested in what your dick looks like so don't send pic. Must be hung. Massage therapist here. No leather or role-play. If you like musical theater, I won't like you. Say something to impress me; be cool, be different. No body hair, no shaved pubes, no roids, not into hookups or groups. In Miami next week, NY week after. No top bunk, bottom bunk metaphors. Be yourself. No man-cunt, man-pussy, or man-breeders. Want new friends more than anything. Watersports welcome. Plan to Skype first so I know you're worth my time. Dates preferred. Must have great sense of humor. No liars; I'll know your real age. Latins to the front of the line. No short guys. Personal trainer too! No bars, non-drinkers. If I'm on here, I'm looking, so don't ask if I'm horny. If you're over 40 please be hot. If you've got a swimmer's build, go swimming and go away. Yoga may be great for the soul, but I don't want to f*** your soul. Must be extremely built. Professional, seeks same. Looking for hot buds to hang with 4 long sessions. No Middle Eastern guys--nothing personal, just a preference. Israelis a plus. Straight-acting. No daddies, dilfs, or bears or cubs or otters, NO twinks, no brainless body worshippers, no way. "Toned" = "Fattie," so don't bother. No "slim" dudes. Not into labels. Not into the "scene." Tired of all the games on here. Spiritual. I'm great-looking, muscular, masc. vers. bottom looking for same to fill my sweet hole. Check out my White Party fb page. Discreet and honest and fun. Looking for a LTR and can't host. I'm real. UB2!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 3:32 AM GMT
    xrichx saidThis is kinda old. But still funny.

    "Everything That's Wrong With Gay Dating Apps in One Extended Profile"

    PERFECTGUY4SAME...

    No fats, no fems, no PNP, no one over 30, no face=no chat, no BS, NSA, no blacks, no Asians (nothing personal, I just think you guys are trolls). If you act gay, no chat. DDF, non-smoker, HIV-neg as of five minutes ago, into Random Play. If you think you're VGL you're probably not. Mixed here. No chat before you send more photos. No husband no wife, no boyfriend, no phonies. Say more than "hi" if you want me to respond. Find me on Instagram. No F-buddies. I'm not interested in what your dick looks like so don't send pic. Must be hung. Massage therapist here. No leather or role-play. If you like musical theater, I won't like you. Say something to impress me; be cool, be different. No body hair, no shaved pubes, no roids, not into hookups or groups. In Miami next week, NY week after. No top bunk, bottom bunk metaphors. Be yourself. No man-cunt, man-pussy, or man-breeders. Want new friends more than anything. Watersports welcome. Plan to Skype first so I know you're worth my time. Dates preferred. Must have great sense of humor. No liars; I'll know your real age. Latins to the front of the line. No short guys. Personal trainer too! No bars, non-drinkers. If I'm on here, I'm looking, so don't ask if I'm horny. If you're over 40 please be hot. If you've got a swimmer's build, go swimming and go away. Yoga may be great for the soul, but I don't want to f*** your soul. Must be extremely built. Professional, seeks same. Looking for hot buds to hang with 4 long sessions. No Middle Eastern guys--nothing personal, just a preference. Israelis a plus. Straight-acting. No daddies, dilfs, or bears or cubs or otters, NO twinks, no brainless body worshippers, no way. "Toned" = "Fattie," so don't bother. No "slim" dudes. Not into labels. Not into the "scene." Tired of all the games on here. Spiritual. I'm great-looking, muscular, masc. vers. bottom looking for same to fill my sweet hole. Check out my White Party fb page. Discreet and honest and fun. Looking for a LTR and can't host. I'm real. UB2!


    "No Middle Eastern guys--nothing personal, just a preference. Israelis a plus".

    what's that supposed to mean? icon_question.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 4:15 AM GMT
    I think this is a subject no guy talks about but is a serious problem for gay guys. Maybe it needs to be brought out in the open.
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Jul 27, 2014 6:59 AM GMT
    I met my husband on RJ so it is possible!
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Jul 27, 2014 7:01 AM GMT
    kevex said"No Middle Eastern guys--nothing personal, just a preference. Israelis a plus".

    what's that supposed to mean? icon_question.gif


    It's a big hypocritical joke, just like the rest of it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2014 7:02 AM GMT
    dating apps
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 875

    Jul 27, 2014 7:46 AM GMT
    Ask yourself "Why would anyone want to date me?"

    Then, ask yourself "Why would anyone whom I find eligible want to date me?"

    If you come up with a list of good reasons, you'll have most of your roadmap drawn for you already.

    Be realistic. Keeping your head above the water these days is not an easy task. School, work, gym, household, career... A guy has limited options, and no one can really afford to start dating without having a good set of reasons for it.

    SC
  • mxne

    Posts: 55

    Jul 27, 2014 2:44 PM GMT
    They don't exist apparently
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jul 27, 2014 11:51 PM GMT
    Erobert saidI'm noticing a pattern with guys on dating apps, online saying sites- most are looking for hookups or are wishy washy about dating or if they are interested in dating their expectations are way out of line and they are looking for the "perfect" guy. Who doesn't exist...

    I met 2 guys on Tinder; one seems a little off and is coming up with excuses for pushing our first "date" (his texts say the opposite) tomorrow. I'm thinking of canceling to avoid disappointment

    The other guy I hooked up and broke my no hookup rule since he was a masc jock type who seemed and was down to earth. Fun but I'd like to actually date a guy like him :/ I'm thinking of deleting Tinder which seems like a not so thinly veiled version of Grindr for "busy" young professionals.

    Meeting guys in real life had been difficult. People say volunteer to met quality guys but a lot of people who seem to volunteer are older retirees. There's Meetup but that's not really good for getting dates. Social groups and organizations have entrance fees which can add up; I'm just seeking a low pressure down to earth environment.

    I'm almost ready to throw in the towel on finding a guy in NYC; a lot of young gay guys are focused on hooking up or are dependent on these "dating" sites to hookup.

    Has anyone had success meeting people online?



    It's been my experience that, for almost all guys, sex is their #1 priority, in a relationship. If you get in a relationship, and the sex isn't working out very well, that torpedoes the relationship. So, what's wrong with having sex before you get to know the guy ? It seems to be a lot easier that way.

    If you just date guys, and have no sex while you're deciding if they're relationship material, it seems to be a huge expense of time, effort, and money. Then, after all this, suppose you decide that a guy IS relationship material, then you have sex, and one or both of you isn't happy with the sex ?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2014 12:20 AM GMT
    I met my current boyfriend in a club. He approached me, we began talking, then danced. By the end of the night he asked me on a date. 5 months later we became official and have been together ever since. That was almost 2 years ago. My advice, If you go out, go in small groups. More guys will approach you. It's less intimidating. Smile, be friendly, take care of yourself, and you will find someone. Or they will find you.