Hookup sites like adam, scruff, grindr, etc. What do you think when someone...?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 15, 2014 10:10 PM GMT
    If you're on a hookup site and they have their profile listed and it says for online chat, networking, friendship and relationship.
    Are they still looking for a hookup and DTF but they want to talk first?
    Or do you think they are on a sex site looking just for friendship?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 15, 2014 10:46 PM GMT
    Could be they just went online to find a good coffee. Or more seriously, between this and your unzip/coffee thread, I get the feeling that you maybe could work on integrating your sexual self with the rest of you. The more comfortable you become with your own sexuality the less you'll be concerned with whether the other guy is motivated sexually. Of course he is.

    Let's get real here. Regardless of how we go about it, pretty much everyone wants a good lay, a decent coffee, some good conversation and a soft chewy bagel in the morning if there's a decent deli nearby.

    I often tend to think that being horny is about the best reason to ever leave the safety of the house. It's nice to find someone who also wants more than just sex, but that doesn't mean they don't want just sex too. We are sexual beings; it is a major aspect of what drives us. You can try to deny yourself that as much as you want but you're either only kidding yourself or making your way towards a monastery.

    Symbol_of_Mystic_Monk_Coffee_Image.jpg
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    Aug 15, 2014 10:49 PM GMT
    I uninstalled Grindr and it's been a really good thing for me so far. Before I did however, I met a guy I've been seeing a lot of and I still am. The app itself gives people the idea that they have plenty of easy to access options which leads to problems given how homos already acted without the likes of Grindr and similar location based apps.

    Not everyone there wants to hookup but most of the guys do, even some of the ones that say they don't at all - do.
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    Aug 15, 2014 11:18 PM GMT
    N2Now said
    Are they still looking for a hookup and DTF but they want to talk first?


    pardon my ignorance, but what is a DTF?

    in any concern, you cannot generalize everyone all the time. and just because maybe in your (or your friends) experience that "all the guys just want to fuck" -- well, no, that's not true...because in my experience it's been the opposite. so no, you cannot generalize and say that just because they don't mention fucking, that they still actually want to fuck.

    this isn't to say that everyone who doesn't mention fucking doesn't really secretly want to fuck. i'm sure some guys do. so you cannot generalize in the opposite way either.

    best thing to do is just be up front, truthful, honest, and just talk to people like a grown adult. if someone ends up being shady, then don't continue talking to them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 15, 2014 11:27 PM GMT
    Why are hidden members allowed to post?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 1:40 AM GMT
    I like pancakes.
  • jaroslav123

    Posts: 600

    Aug 16, 2014 1:40 AM GMT
    kevex saidWhy are hidden members allowed to post?


    Because they're part of the all-controlling, all seeing illuminati. icon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 2:11 AM GMT
    theantijock saidCould be they just went online to find a good coffee. Or more seriously, between this and your unzip/coffee thread, I get the feeling that you maybe could work on integrating your sexual self with the rest of you. The more comfortable you become with your own sexuality the less you'll be concerned with whether the other guy is motivated sexually. Of course he is.

    Let's get real here. Regardless of how we go about it, pretty much everyone wants a good lay, a decent coffee, some good conversation and a soft chewy bagel in the morning if there's a decent deli nearby.

    I often tend to think that being horny is about the best reason to ever leave the safety of the house. It's nice to find someone who also wants more than just sex, but that doesn't mean they don't want just sex too. We are sexual beings; it is a major aspect of what drives us. You can try to deny yourself that as much as you want but you're either only kidding yourself or making your way towards a monastery.

    Symbol_of_Mystic_Monk_Coffee_Image.jpg
    My thoughts are I just thought this would be a good topic to talk about and BTW I like the mystic monk very cool!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 2:13 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]ChristopherMcG said[/cite]I uninstalled Grindr and it's been a really good thing for me so far. Before I did however, I met a guy I've been seeing a lot of and I still am. The app itself gives people the idea that they have plenty of easy to access options which leads to problems given how homos already acted without the likes of Grindr and similar location based apps.

    Not everyone there wants to hookup but most of the guys do, even some of the ones that say they don't at all - do.

    ***I'm thinking about getting it! It looks like it could be a lot of fun!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 2:14 AM GMT
    jaroslav123 said
    kevex saidWhy are hidden members allowed to post?


    Because they're part of the all-controlling, all seeing illuminati. icon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gif
    OMG lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:34 PM GMT
    willular said
    N2Now said
    Are they still looking for a hookup and DTF but they want to talk first?


    pardon my ignorance, but what is a DTF?


    Down To Fuck - a phrase probably more used by straight guys.
  • Aleco_Graves

    Posts: 708

    Aug 16, 2014 5:42 PM GMT
    Im listed and friends and networking on Grindr.
    Im mostly their cause its fun to talk and you occasionally get to meet really cool people. Go for coffee or just chat without getting harassed by a dick-pic

    But yes ive had the intention of having fun with my profile still saying that. I do want to chat before doing anyhting like that, make sure the guy is decent. I cant really just sleep with anyone (well I can. I am physically able, but dont want to), I want to now them a bit. Makes it easier to connect to the person and make it intenser too.

    The biggest boner killer is an asshole so I pass having anything to do with those guys.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 6:59 PM GMT
    I think that chat and networking listed in status is just the way to say bog off to strange and random people they don't like whereas they definely are searching for sort of perfect hook up with the perfect guy of their dreams lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 7:10 PM GMT
    It's a godsend to folks that cannot handle intimacy. Sucking someone's cock is the best they can do. What kind of jam would you like on yer bagle? Bye!
  • cyclinghiker

    Posts: 16

    Aug 16, 2014 9:39 PM GMT
    I am one of the strange/frustrating ones on Grindr who really is just looking for friendship and great conversations. Keep in mind there really is no other way to meet gay men easily where I live, so the app has become a virtual gay bar of sorts. And while my success rate of finding those great people to add to my life has been very low after examining the amount of chats I have had, I did meet one of my best friends on Grindr, and that alone has made the app very well worth using it for my crazy alternative methods.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 10:14 PM GMT
    I guess I'm one of those rare guys who's hoping for a decent friendship on grindr. Seem a bit difficult in my location,
    I wonder if it's easier in other locations like San Fran or NYC
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 10:20 PM GMT
    I think that they are just that, hookup sites. Not meant for friendship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 10:41 PM GMT
    Aleco_Graves saidIm listed and friends and networking on Grindr.
    Im mostly their cause its fun to talk and you occasionally get to meet really cool people. Go for coffee or just chat without getting harassed by a dick-pic

    But yes ive had the intention of having fun with my profile still saying that. I do want to chat before doing anyhting like that, make sure the guy is decent. I cant really just sleep with anyone (well I can. I am physically able, but dont want to), I want to now them a bit. Makes it easier to connect to the person and make it intenser too.

    The biggest boner killer is an asshole so I pass having anything to do with those guys.



    What kind of English is this?!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 10:45 PM GMT
    Despite having a boyfriend I use grindr here and there. Because it's an easy way how to talk to strangers and I really like meeting new people.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 10:45 PM GMT
    kevex saidI think that they are just that, hookup sites. Not meant for friendship.


    Well not necessarily, I met decent friends through a4a about 5-8 years ago while I lived in San Antonio. There are exceptions to the norm.
  • Aleco_Graves

    Posts: 708

    Aug 16, 2014 11:12 PM GMT
    klobasnik said
    Aleco_Graves saidIm listed and friends and networking on Grindr.
    Im mostly their cause its fun to talk and you occasionally get to meet really cool people. Go for coffee or just chat without getting harassed by a dick-pic

    But yes ive had the intention of having fun with my profile still saying that. I do want to chat before doing anyhting like that, make sure the guy is decent. I cant really just sleep with anyone (well I can. I am physically able, but dont want to), I want to now them a bit. Makes it easier to connect to the person and make it intenser too.

    The biggest boner killer is an asshole so I pass having anything to do with those guys.



    What kind of English is this?!


    Ahh the Linguist Finally strikes... I

    I'm sorry if my English wasn't up to your standard, I usually speak the Queens English better than Margret Thatcher herself, but i'm struggling just a bit staying conscious while i type as the Pain Killers Dull my brain at this moment (I just got circumcised, read the forum) much less get my sentence structure and apply rules of concord correctly right now.

    But by all means... Post about something as irrelevant as proper language use on a forum clearly about human relations and behavior.
  • waccamatt

    Posts: 1918

    Aug 16, 2014 11:44 PM GMT
    N2Now saidIf you're on a hookup site and they have their profile listed and it says for online chat, networking, friendship and relationship.
    Are they still looking for a hookup and DTF but they want to talk first?
    Or do you think they are on a sex site looking just for friendship?


    Each person is different. You could try asking them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 17, 2014 12:21 AM GMT
    Are there non-hookup sites where you can meet gay friends ?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 17, 2014 12:27 AM GMT
    Okajuurou saidAre there non-hookup sites where you can meet gay friends ?


    Www.RealJock.com
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 17, 2014 12:30 AM GMT
    the beef i had that finally got me to delete grindr was that a person would have this puritanical baloney about "no hookups" on their profile and then the first communication you get from them is a sexy quarter-view of their unclothed form. I certainly don't mind sexy quarter-views of unclothed forms but seriously?