A different spin on racism in dating (sexuality irrelevant)

  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 4:10 PM GMT
    A friend of mine and I were talking last night and the topic of interracial dating came up. He's a bisexual and he's currently with a white woman. He was telling me how a lot of his white male friends tell him it must so easy for him as a black guy to get white girls and he laughed because nothing could be further from the truth. He said his interactions with white women either range from their legit disgust with him being black to wanting him to fuck them like they're in a really bad porno. They treat him like a walking dildo. He's been told by women that he doesn't act black enough or he's not the kind they're looking for. Most of them he says are looking for a stereotype not a soul mate.

    To a degree I can relate to this because most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality. Because of this a lot of men say shit to me, sexual stuff, right from the cuff I'm pretty sure they would not have if I were white. But they assume that I as a black man am constantly on the hunt for white ass looking to shove my gigantic black dick in the ass of whoever suits my fancy. I've had a lot of guys get turned off when they realize I'm not Tyrone from down the block. I mean I'm not Bryant Gumbel but I'm not Waka Flocka either. In the times I do meet a guy I click with I always have this conscious thought to hold back a little bit of my personality, not talk as much and maybe not let on that I'm a bottom so they're not turned off instantly.

    My friend went on tell me how with a lot of white women he knows he's basically the fantasy and the person Tiffany wants to use to get back at daddy. He does not wish to be used that way and so he typically can pick these kind of girls out and reject them. Apparently that's when things take a left and they insult him and get very racial. Basically saying how someone like him, a black man, would never have a chance with her anyway.

    I've noticed that because of how attraction based the gay community is there are sometimes I've noticed guys being downright hostile to me. I mean they could just be assholes but I'm sure every person of color can relate to feeling as if the disinterested guy who's barely feigning interest in speaking to you would be more interested it you were white or maybe even lighter skinned. My friend is actually half black and half Korean but the Asian side doesn't show as much. He's lighter toned yes but people still point him out as black and treat him as such. With the woman he's dating now he said that she's blissfully unaware there is a racial component to their relationship. They were at Barnes and Noble the other day and they when they greeted each other they kissed. She remarked how she saw a man shaking his head at her and she assumed it was because of her skirt. My friend didn't have the heart to break it to her that her outfit had nothing to do with it.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:02 PM GMT
    bla bla bla
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:07 PM GMT
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:09 PM GMT
    Oh, snap! He's not usually funny but in this case I got about five minutes of yuks out of it.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:17 PM GMT
    theantijock said
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
    Only white people call people purple.

    http://stuffwhitepeopledo.blogspot.com/2009/03/invoke-strangely-colored-people.html
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 5:22 PM GMT
    bon_pan saidOh, snap! He's not usually funny but in this case I got about five minutes of yuks out of it.


    I wasn't trying to be funny
  • jaroslav123

    Posts: 600

    Aug 16, 2014 5:24 PM GMT
    kevex saidbla bla bla


    Your wit is so coruscating and lacerating. Congratulations.
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    Aug 16, 2014 5:25 PM GMT
    Inque said
    bon_pan saidOh, snap! He's not usually funny but in this case I got about five minutes of yuks out of it.


    I wasn't trying to be funny


    Not you, I was referring to AJ
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 5:28 PM GMT
    bon_pan said
    Inque said
    bon_pan saidOh, snap! He's not usually funny but in this case I got about five minutes of yuks out of it.


    I wasn't trying to be funny


    Not you, I was referring to AJ


    Oh okay. Any comment on what I actually wrote?
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    Aug 16, 2014 7:22 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    theantijock said
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
    Only white people call people purple.

    http://stuffwhitepeopledo.blogspot.com/2009/03/invoke-strangely-colored-people.html


    But all the black people tell me that being white puts me in the pink. So fair is fair. Now if I have sex with a black guy, after I figure out if he's top or bottom, of course, would that make me a pink purple peter eater?

    Hey, I'm one of the guys who don't see color. So if I said purple it was only because if I said red someone might accuse me of being racist.



    What's black and blue and goes ding dong?

    A beat up Avon Lady.

    6a0105356c398f970c0115700781f6970c-pi.jp
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 7:25 PM GMT
    theantijock said
    paulflexes said
    theantijock said
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
    Only white people call people purple.

    http://stuffwhitepeopledo.blogspot.com/2009/03/invoke-strangely-colored-people.html


    But all the black people tell me that being white puts me in the pink. So fair is fair. Now if I have sex with a black guy, after I figure out if he's top or bottom, of course, would that make me a pink purple peter eater?

    Hey, I one of the guys who don't see color. So if I said purple it was only because if I said red someone might accuse me of being racist.



    What's black and blue and goes ding dong?

    A beat up Avon Lady.

    6a0105356c398f970c0115700781f6970c-pi.jp


    People like you are just as bad because you obviously do see color but you imply that there is almost something wrong to notice that someone if of another race or that is wrong it and of itself to be of another race
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    Aug 16, 2014 7:29 PM GMT
    Inque said
    People like you are just as bad because you obviously do see color but you imply that there is almost something wrong to notice that someone if of another race or that is wrong it and of itself to be of another race


    People like me?

    We notice poor sentence structure.

    Look, kid, I can see you are struggling through this and I meant no offense to you, just having some fun. My apologies if you found any of my content offensive.

    And just to clarify for you what I think you said which sounds like a misperception of me: I firmly think, believe, feel and champion that every race is right, no race is wrong. Being is being. Peace.
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    Aug 16, 2014 7:45 PM GMT
    Sounds like the OP is finally getting the message.
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 7:52 PM GMT
    theantijock said
    Inque said
    People like you are just as bad because you obviously do see color but you imply that there is almost something wrong to notice that someone if of another race or that is wrong it and of itself to be of another race


    People like me?

    We notice poor sentence structure.

    Look, kid, I can see you are struggling through this and I meant no offense to you, just having some fun. My apologies if you found any of my content offensive.

    And just to clarify for you what I think you said which sounds like a misperception of me: I firmly think, believe, feel and champion that every race is right, no race is wrong. Being is being. Peace.


    I apologize if I came outta pocket
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 7:52 PM GMT
    pazzy said
    paulflexes said
    theantijock said
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
    Only white people call people purple.

    http://stuffwhitepeopledo.blogspot.com/2009/03/invoke-strangely-colored-people.html



    real shit though that one of my homeboys told me back in the day that's funny as fuck.

    how the FUCK do some white people call nonwhites colored when white people are the REAL colored people? when ya get hit or get mad, ya turn red. when ya lose air or can't breathe, ya turn blue or purple. when it gets hot outside, ya turn brown or orange. WTF? fucking rainbows and shit.


    Like a damn walking talking mood ring
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    Aug 16, 2014 7:57 PM GMT
    pazzy saidreal shit though that one of my homeboys told me back in the day that's funny as fuck.

    how the FUCK do some white people call nonwhites colored when white people are the REAL colored people? when ya get hit or get mad, ya turn red. when ya lose air or can't breathe, ya turn blue or purple. when it gets hot outside, ya turn brown or orange. WTF? fucking rainbows and shit.


    Cute but be careful because now you're differentiating the world into the colored and the colors.

  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 7:59 PM GMT
    As black men it's almost as if our sexuality is chosen for us
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 8:01 PM GMT
    ewww
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 16, 2014 11:11 PM GMT
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 16, 2014 11:13 PM GMT
    timmm55 said
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs


    Ignore him. What do you think about what I wrote?
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    Aug 16, 2014 11:20 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    theantijock said
    Inque said...most guys assume I'm a top before they even really get a feel of my personality...


    You're in luck. Black, white or purple, nobody who saw that pic of you standing with your legs crossed thinks you're a top. Problem solved.
    Only white people call people purple.

    http://stuffwhitepeopledo.blogspot.com/2009/03/invoke-strangely-colored-people.html


    I read the whole idiotic thing!
    I thought it went back to MLK and Jesse Jackson's Rainbow Coalition.....silly me.


    logo.gif
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    Aug 16, 2014 11:42 PM GMT
    Inque said
    timmm55 said
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs


    Ignore him. What do you think about what I wrote?


    Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. (A response to people who over analyze meaning to everything, it may not be phallic at all!).

    I've caught myself looking at an attractive black man, and ironically I stop looking at him because I'm afraid he'll think I'm looking at him because he IS black. I'm an older white guy, and I have to be aware of how they may misconstrue my looking...I have to worry that I look like a typical racist lol.

    I have a "buddy" who is black. I've seldom seen him with a black man (once). Do that mean anything? I don't think so, nor do I care. We are friends.

    "He said his interactions with white women either range from their legit disgust with him being black to wanting him to fuck them like they're in a really bad porno." seems like quite a polarizing divide.
    I think there is a true middle ground somewhere, and he luckily found it. There are the black stereotypes, but that's what people see.....the obvious. Just like the Flaming Fag is "Gay", it's what is so easily identified. The Black "Thug" and "Mandingo" to name two.

    But as a Gay person I think we miss a lot of nuances too. We presume hatred. Even if it's not real, it's something we are conditioned to see.
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    Aug 16, 2014 11:49 PM GMT
    timmm55 said
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs


    You support having sex with HIV + guys. You're disgusting and sick.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 17, 2014 12:19 AM GMT
    kevex said
    timmm55 said
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs


    You support having sex with HIV + guys. You're disgusting and sick.


    Stick with the subject you stupid twit!
  • Inque

    Posts: 517

    Aug 17, 2014 1:48 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    Inque said
    timmm55 said
    kevex saidewww



    You're getting to be a lazy troll! All I've sen lately is "ewwww"s and icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gifs


    Ignore him. What do you think about what I wrote?


    Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. (A response to people who over analyze meaning to everything, it may not be phallic at all!).

    I've caught myself looking at an attractive black man, and ironically I stop looking at him because I'm afraid he'll think I'm looking at him because he IS black. I'm an older white guy, and I have to be aware of how they may misconstrue my looking...I have to worry that I look like a typical racist lol.

    I have a "buddy" who is black. I've seldom seen him with a black man (once). Do that mean anything? I don't think so, nor do I care. We are friends.

    "He said his interactions with white women either range from their legit disgust with him being black to wanting him to fuck them like they're in a really bad porno." seems like quite a polarizing divide.
    I think there is a true middle ground somewhere, and he luckily found it. There are the black stereotypes, but that's what people see.....the obvious. Just like the Flaming Fag is "Gay", it's what is so easily identified. The Black "Thug" and "Mandingo" to name two.

    But as a Gay person I think we miss a lot of nuances too. We presume hatred. Even if it's not real, it's something we are conditioned to see.


    I'm a little confused by what you're trying to say no offense. I'm saying that a lot of times I feel as an African American my usefulness is defined solely in my perceived sexuality and nothing else.