Getting to HEART of who I am!

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    Jan 13, 2009 12:53 AM GMT
    It's funny, sometimes I forget, even though I'm a passionate relationship coach for single gay men, I'm sometimes faced with challenges of being single myself. "Will I meet the wrong person again or will I cave in and compromise my values?" Will I back away and not ASSERT myself to get what I want?

    I know what the answer is, but sometimes those fears creep in and they challenge me to revisit the core values that help me make solid, conscious choices. I think of those fears as gentle nudges asking me, "Hey, buddy, are you ok?" "What do you need to do, right now, to get back on track and what does that look like?" Once I stopped being enemies with fear and started being an ally, everything changed. They're not as threatening and believe it or not, I welcome them.

    Ok, so, what is a "core-value" and how do "I get some?"


    The best way that I can describe it is: They are the values that are at the heart of who you are. I know in my heart, I'm an honest, compassionate man full of integrity and inner peace. It's funny now, because once upon a time, I wouldn't have been able to say that about myself. And, well, "getting some" doesn't require too much, other than stillness, being self-aware and the willingness to look within. Because, that's where those values live. That's where they have always been. : )

    What's hanging around at the heart of who you are?

    Love,

    Greg
    http://www.TheGayGuysLoveCoach.com
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    Jan 14, 2009 2:57 PM GMT



    Greg38 said, ""Will I meet the wrong person again or will I cave in and compromise my values?" Will I back away and not ASSERT myself to get what I want?"

    ...and from each of our own pasts, we'll say yes to the first. To meet that right person is a matter of meeting people - many many people.heh

    Neither of us compromised our core values - they're what we're made of, so to step out of character was pretty awkward and only attempted when we were in our early 20s and trying to fit in. Or are you referring to going with someone because of loneliness or horny-ness and so deciding on someone that you know you'll feel nothing for? Not sure about that one....

    Backing away and not asserting yourself. Well, assertion can be a lot of things. Getting your own way or guiding a relationship away from 'reefs'?

    Interesting stuff!

    -Doug of meninlove