Why are sexually active gay men referred to as sluts?

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    Aug 27, 2014 3:07 AM GMT
    This is something that's confusing me.

    All this time, I thought the word slut specifically refers to a woman that is sexually active. Unless the definition has changed over time, growing up I never heard a guy being called a slut until I got to know the gay community more. The idea is just so foreign to me.

    The reason I ask is because I got lucky a couple of nights ago when me and some friends went out to a bar. Of course my friends were excited for me, but they did drop some "omg you're such a slut" jokingly. I mean, if a straight guy scores a night with a gal, he's probably getting high-fives from all his buddies, so why are gay men held to another standard if we're all just guys?

    I'm genuinely curious and not trying to start a flame war or anything...

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    Aug 27, 2014 3:12 AM GMT
    Because it takes too long to say "uninhibited and generous in their love nature."

    Old joke: what's the difference between a slut and a bitch?

    A slut will have sex with anyone. A bitch will have sex with anyone, but you.
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:13 AM GMT
    I really don't get slut shaming. Since when is having sex an immoral thing? We are sexual creatures just like the rest of the animal kingdom. When straights do it, it's OK. When gays do it, it's perversion? What happened to live and let live? icon_neutral.gif
  • jo2hotbod

    Posts: 3603

    Aug 27, 2014 3:16 AM GMT
    Because they are and yes it applies to men straight, bi, gay, crocked, Martian, what ever
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:17 AM GMT
    kevex saidI really don't get slut shaming. Since when is having sex an immoral thing? We are sexual creatures just like the rest of the animal kingdom. When straights do it, it's OK. When gays do it, it's perversion? What happened to live and let live? icon_neutral.gif


    That's what I don't get. I bet straight guys treat it like it's competition with their buddies to see who can get the most chicks a night. Yet I don't see people rolling their eyes...
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:27 AM GMT
    Why are sexually active gay men referred to as sluts?

    Because the gay men who wish they were sexually active are bitter...and have limited vocabularies.
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:30 AM GMT
    HydesOut2 saidWhy are sexually active gay men referred to as sluts?

    Because the gay men who wish they were sexually active are bitter
    and spiteful...and have limited vocabularies.




    +1 icon_lol.gif Harsh but true
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:35 AM GMT
    jo2hotbod saidBecause they are and yes it applies to men straight, bi, gay, crocked, Martian, what ever


    +1
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    Aug 27, 2014 3:41 AM GMT
    Klusps said
    kevex saidI really don't get slut shaming. Since when is having sex an immoral thing? We are sexual creatures just like the rest of the animal kingdom. When straights do it, it's OK. When gays do it, it's perversion? What happened to live and let live? icon_neutral.gif


    That's what I don't get. I bet straight guys treat it like it's competition with their buddies to see who can get the most chicks a night. Yet I don't see people rolling their eyes...



    lol Dunno. I've noticed that gay dudes that shame on ther's for being "sluts" are actually sexually frustrated. I don't understand why gay men are so obsessed with what other gays do with their bodies.
  • killercliche

    Posts: 948

    Aug 27, 2014 4:38 AM GMT
    Klusps said
    kevex saidI really don't get slut shaming. Since when is having sex an immoral thing? We are sexual creatures just like the rest of the animal kingdom. When straights do it, it's OK. When gays do it, it's perversion? What happened to live and let live? icon_neutral.gif


    That's what I don't get. I bet straight guys treat it like it's competition with their buddies to see who can get the most chicks a night. Yet I don't see people rolling their eyes...


    But that's a key difference. With a pack of guys "on the hunt" there is an "us vs. them" mentality that plays out like teammates in a competitive sport cheering each other on.

    Also, it's worth pointing out that women socialize in a manner where they would be more likely to call each other sluts, not because only women can be sluts, but because women see each other as competitors rather than teammates and so the slut shaming occurs.

    As far as I'm concerned, if you are having sex, you are a slut.
    #highfivegoteam
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    Aug 27, 2014 4:40 AM GMT
    jealousy
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    Aug 27, 2014 4:42 AM GMT
    killercliche said
    Klusps said
    kevex saidI really don't get slut shaming. Since when is having sex an immoral thing? We are sexual creatures just like the rest of the animal kingdom. When straights do it, it's OK. When gays do it, it's perversion? What happened to live and let live? icon_neutral.gif


    That's what I don't get. I bet straight guys treat it like it's competition with their buddies to see who can get the most chicks a night. Yet I don't see people rolling their eyes...


    But that's a key difference. With a pack of guys "on the hunt" there is an "us vs. them" mentality that plays out like teammates in a competitive sport cheering each other on.

    Also, it's worth pointing out that women socialize in a manner where they would be more likely to call each other sluts, not because only women can be sluts, but because women see each other as competitors rather than teammates and so the slut shaming occurs.

    As far as I'm concerned, if you are having sex, you are a slut.

    #highfivegoteam




    Huh?
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    Aug 27, 2014 5:10 AM GMT
    HydesOut2 saidWhy are sexually active gay men referred to as sluts?

    Because the gay men who wish they were sexually active are bitter
    and spiteful...and have limited vocabularies.


    I'm going to have to disagree with you on that one, primarily based on anecdotal observations.
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    Aug 27, 2014 5:15 AM GMT
    I believe the word *Slut applies to women. Men who do the same thing, it's called being a *Stud? Lol, there's no slut-shaming with men (gays included). Urg, as long as you're being safe and not hurting anyone, nobody cares who You sleep with.
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    Aug 27, 2014 5:24 AM GMT
    pazzy said
    HydesOut2 saidWhy are sexually active gay men referred to as sluts?

    Because the gay men who wish they were sexually active are bitter...
    and have limited vocabularies.


    you sure about that????


    yep!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 27, 2014 6:08 AM GMT
    Back in my day, before AIDS, it wasn't a pejorative term, simply a word that said that someone had sex with a lot of guys. And
    being a slut was more the norm than not.

    Back then I lived in San Diego and a small group of us would get together Sunday morning for coffee and pastries and brag about our Friday night and Saturday sexploits / sexcapades.
  • buddycat

    Posts: 1874

    Aug 27, 2014 6:35 AM GMT
    I agree, they are referred to sluts because that is what they are.
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    Aug 27, 2014 6:43 AM GMT
    Slut or slattern is a term applied to an individual who is considered to have loose sexual morals or who is sexually promiscuous.
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    Aug 27, 2014 11:53 AM GMT
    Because sex is still considered dirty by many. Yes, even by some gay men, and if you get a lot of it you are considered dirty and a slut. It's obvious from some of the responses here.

    Sad but true.
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    Aug 27, 2014 11:58 AM GMT
    silver_phoenix said
    atlanticshore saidSlut or slattern is a term applied to an individual who is considered to have loose sexual morals or who is sexually promiscuous.


    Only to females.


    By strict definition, yes. But since many gay men adopt female terminology for themselves it would be expected that they would adopt this pejorative one.
  • 24hourguy

    Posts: 364

    Aug 27, 2014 12:19 PM GMT
    envy icon_twisted.gif
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    Aug 27, 2014 12:26 PM GMT
    have you ever asked how many sexual partners your straight male friends have had in their lifetime? and your straight female friends? if we assume they're purposefully downgrading the number out of modesty, and we double whatever they tell us, i think they would still only be scratching the surface of what most gay guys would say.
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    Aug 27, 2014 12:51 PM GMT
    24hourguy saidenvy icon_twisted.gif


    truth
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    Aug 27, 2014 2:29 PM GMT
    silver_phoenix said
    atlanticshore saidSlut or slattern is a term applied to an individual who is considered to have loose sexual morals or who is sexually promiscuous.


    Only to females.


    Definitions change and mutate, I think I have called more men (straight and gay) than women sluts.
  • FuerteC

    Posts: 588

    Aug 27, 2014 2:41 PM GMT
    Gay men are more likely to get HIV from unprotected sex. That is why hey are called sluts. Heterosexual men can get married. In many countries gay men cannot. Being polygamous and not monogamous imply gay men are more likely to seek out other men for gratification. How many gay men use Grindr? How many gay men get tested??

    Also heterosexual men and heterosexual women can make babies. Gay men cannot naturally make one with another man. The procreation of our species imply straight men and straight men who sleep around are more normal than gay men who just sleep around and NOT making babies. It is not "normal" in the sense of the majority.

    Straight men can sleep around too, don't forget. But there is this asymmetric bias towards gay men because they are more likely to be exclusively gay.

    For these two reasons, gay men who sleep around with multiple partners are called sluts.

    End of topic.