MEETING A MAN FOR A FIRST TIME


  • Sep 05, 2014 7:26 AM GMT
    What are some of the most important things u would want to remember if u did it again?
    Would u spend the night the first time?
    Will he expect anal sex?
    How do u spend the first 20 mins?
    You know he and u both are HIV and STD negative then what?
    Do u think it should be long term or play it as u spend the day?
    Does it matter if there is a huge age difference?
    Is big good or does that matter?
    How do u handle staying in the closet afterwards if u don't want your family knowing u r gay?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2014 10:48 AM GMT
    This is just me, but personally if I were to meet someone for the first time I'd keep it comfortable and casual and generally don't put out on the first date.

    Unless of course you are looking for a hook up then I don't know, but I imagine you just meet up and then have sex and then leave or something like that.
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 872

    Sep 05, 2014 1:03 PM GMT
    YesIWantOne saidWhat are some of the most important things u would want to remember if u did it again?
    Would u spend the night the first time?
    Will he expect anal sex?
    How do u spend the first 20 mins?
    You know he and u both are HIV and STD negative then what?
    Do u think it should be long term or play it as u spend the day?
    Does it matter if there is a huge age difference?
    Is big good or does that matter?
    How do u handle staying in the closet afterwards if u don't want your family knowing u r gay?


    #1
    Do not set things in stone. Nothing is achieved by limiting your own options even before the actual thing starts.

    #2
    He may or may not expect sex, or even anal sex for that matter. That's his good right. You can take your time, see if this may work for you, and call the shots when you feel comfortable with doing so.

    #3
    Spend the first 20+ min figuring out if you like the guy, and more importantly if he is sane or not? Err on the side of safety.

    #4
    There are many types of knowledge. (See Rumsfeld!) Assume that both of you are perfectly ignorant and use condoms.

    #5
    Who knows? Take your time. Use common sense, and make decisions as you go.

    #6
    Age difference is bad for some people. It is irrelevant to the others, and it works miracles for some. Only he and you can decide where both of you stand on this issue.

    #7
    I'd venture to say that most guys like it BIG. You make up your own mind.

    #8
    You are meeting another dude for whatever. You are NOT buying the front page of the NYT to advertise this event. icon_razz.gif Point out to the dude that you'd like to keep your meeting/spending time together strictly private. You have your reasons, and it does not take a real rocket scientist to figure them out. Besides, even if you were out, and all... you still do not have any obligation to advertise every starting affair/date/hookup/whatever you may be having to the rest of your folks.

    SC

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2014 2:06 PM GMT
    i would really really encourage you to meet with someone your own age and I am an older guy here. Your 18 right? Age of consent is a big legal thing and varies state by state.

    you can ask him: where he works, is he married straight gay partnered children and if he is single. Ask last time he was tested and where, get tested your self. Tho it is a private event. Make sure a friend knows what your are doing. Meet up in a public coffee shop or something. Be prepared to use condoms that you take along with you.

    meeting someone dosnt imply you have to have sex with them. Be the gay bitch and toss it to the curb if its ugly. Set the standards make it your choice. Try to keep it memorable for your own sake.

    make out, get give a blow job and leave. Do what you want. Anal sex is not that frequent a thing. If your the bottom, your depending on the skill and consideration of your partner. This is almost always not a given as human nature being what it is.

    coming out is a personal decision
    will the people you tell be able to contribute to your emotional needs? If not; dont tell them, gay is not a religion and your not out to convert them the the next best thing you discovered. It would be nice to be able to confide in someone. Tell them what bar you went to last Friday, who you met on grinder but if, especially your parents, dont know your gay after all the years they have known you, there must be a lot of denial going on. at your age you dont owe your parents as much as you think. Worst case; you out your self to someone ignorant and than you wait three months for them to come around to the idea. Do it if you want or bring home a husband and rings for thanks giving dinner, your choice.



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2014 3:22 PM GMT
    First time icon_question.gificon_question.gif
    Take the thing slowly , meet in a public place and start to know about each other .
    Analyse his personality and how he treats the people around him ( the server if you are in a food or drink establishment ) how it talks about the patrons ( criticizing their manners or outfits ) and how he talks about his past boyfriend(s) or hook-up partner(s) .

    When it comes to being intimate , don't let him bully you in something you don't want to do , if he is a pusher , leave immediately !

    Have you tested and keep the record with you , ask for same .

    If you only want a nice roll in the hay with him , be upfront with him , don't let him believe you are shooting for a relationship .

    You are new at man sex ,so i definitely would chose someone with an average cock , too big and sex could be uncomfortable .

    Be sure the bloke you are meeting , knows how you feel about your own privacy .