Will I look like a gold digger,toy boy and a marriage destroyer If I accept his propossal??

  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 7:09 AM GMT
    So this cute guy approaches me...He says he loves and adores me....He knows nothing about me which makes it hard for me to believe his words....Oh he is married,He has 2 kids and he is over 30 and I'm just 19....He says I'll have Act like I am his gardener so I can come at his home....Even If I do accept his proposal(which seems possible) I care about what my friends and family would think...Not only will they find out I'm Gay,They'll also find out that I broke a couples marriage,they'll think I'm a gold digger coz this guy is loaded...I don't wanna be this guys toy boy but he seems sincere....lol I'm still young,fresh and I want to achieve a lot and he is offering all my needs in a silver plate....I'm an independant person but this guy is cute and mascular....Should I just go with the flow and believe everything he says and ignore opinions of my friends and family??
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    Sep 11, 2014 11:40 AM GMT
    You can't be serious! Listen to yourself.
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    Sep 11, 2014 1:09 PM GMT
    Pukszen24 said
    Should I just go with the flow and believe everything he says and ignore opinions of my friends and family??

    I don't know about South African law, and US law itself is evolving on matters involving gays, but...

    We have a legal charge called "Alienation of Affection" when a third person breaks up a marriage. A vengeful wife will use that against (traditionally) another woman who messes with her husband. It's not used too much today, but it remains on the books in some US States.

    Make sure SA doesn't have something similar. If he's still legally married to her, you could find yourself in legal problems.

    The morality of your position is a different issue. It isn't all his doing and responsibility - it take 2 to tango. What if we were discussing a woman, rather than yourself, who was romantically involved with a husband that leads to a marriage & family break-up involving young children? How would you, and many people, view this "other woman"? Probably not too favorably.
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 2:08 PM GMT
    @Predemusjoc well I am serious!!Well the thing is this guy approached me and he is so damn cute but he is still married,He did not mention any divorce,He never said anything bad about his wife....I don't know what he possibly can want from me!!
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 2:13 PM GMT
    @Art_deco like how can something soo wrong feel right?? And the more I discuss him is the more I'm conviced that he is my Man....But to be honest he looks like a family Man so I don't think he shall seperate from his family...This Man is putting me in a difficult situation..
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    Sep 11, 2014 2:30 PM GMT
    Will I look like a gold digger,toy boy and a marriage destroyer If I accept his proposal??


    YES
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    Sep 11, 2014 2:33 PM GMT
    Pukszen24 said@Art_deco like how can something soo wrong feel right?? And the more I discuss him is the more I'm conviced that he is my Man....But to be honest he looks like a family Man so I don't think he shall seperate from his family...This Man is putting me in a difficult situation..

    No he isn't. Just say no. You are 19, and there are many (and more suitable) fish in the sea.

    Or maybe YOU'RE the fish, about to swallow the wrong bait. And watch yourself be gutted by his wife. Just walk away from this.
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    Sep 11, 2014 2:57 PM GMT
    as I am still working on who's sock you are...

    --He's toats cute and the purest definition of "straight acting"...just your type...

    The real question is can you fake being a gardener?
    Can you get a chauffeurs license?
  • xBEHEMOTHx

    Posts: 95

    Sep 11, 2014 3:07 PM GMT
    Even if this were true you wouldn't be breaking up a marriage.. he probably just wants to. Use your hole while the wife is away but nothing more trust
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    Sep 11, 2014 3:47 PM GMT
    Pukszen24 said@Predemusjoc well I am serious!!Well the thing is this guy approached me and he is so damn cute but he is still married,He did not mention any divorce,He never said anything bad about his wife....I don't know what he possibly can want from me!!

    If you said he knows nothing about you, that probably means that you know nothing about him. Do you really want to be with someone under those circumstances? Don't you have any self-esteem? Someone says they like you and want to be with you (even though they know nothing about you!!!) and you go running? I can't understand that logic. And, he's married, so he's going to use you for whatever sex he can get from you. Is that what you really want to be to someone? How long do you honestly think it's going to last...until he finds someone new to use, I bet, and then you're out. Dude, you need to think more of yourself, and not get used this way. Don't you want a life and career of your own? Do you have any life goals? What do you want out of life?
    Anyway, just my opinion.
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    Sep 11, 2014 3:59 PM GMT


    Try and look at it this way: If you were married to a guy, how would you feel if he pulled this stunt on you that this married man is doing to his wife? I suspect you'd be rather upset.
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    Sep 11, 2014 5:03 PM GMT
    stop trolling dude.
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 5:29 PM GMT
    You guys are really making strong points and I now realise that accepting his offer will ruin a lot of things and probably destroy a lot of hearts...He suggested that I will be there as a gardener but obviously it will also be my way of getting to see him...He said he shall teach me to masturbate and of course we did not talk about sex for long since I told him I had no experience....At first I kept on thinking about what people will say if it comes out but lately I've been thinking of how fun and interesting It will be....I'm the one that gave him my contacts coz I was in a hurry and he seemed like he had a lot to say...It's only been 2 days and I'm yet to recieve his call but my gaydar tells me that he will phone...I have not thought that much about his family like what if he decided to get a divorce,what will happen to them...I'm still thinking of my side like how I can resolve this situation...
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 5:40 PM GMT
    And I would also like to add that I do have goals I wanna reach!! I am an independant kinda guy and brave guys are those that approach me coz I'm really straight acting which turns me on in some way....It feels so good to be wanted in that manner...
  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    Sep 11, 2014 5:45 PM GMT
    He considers you a prize? He must be butt fugly and a lil cray-cray...
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 11, 2014 6:31 PM GMT
    Hahaha looolsss LMAO kkkkk I can't believe you said that but he ain't that ugly he is cute in his own way and he is just so sincere!!
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    Sep 11, 2014 8:16 PM GMT
    Close your legs to married men girlfriend
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    Sep 12, 2014 4:36 AM GMT

    "You guys are really making strong points and I now realise that accepting his offer will ruin a lot of things and probably destroy a lot of hearts.."

    In can also deeply damage your own. A self inflicted wound is much harder to heal.

    You need a hug. *hug*
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    Sep 12, 2014 4:54 AM GMT
    meninlove said
    "You guys are really making strong points and I now realise that accepting his offer will ruin a lot of things and probably destroy a lot of hearts.."

    In can also deeply damage your own. A self inflicted wound is much harder to heal.

    You need a hug. *hug*

    And more [[[[ HUGZ ]]]]

    Is this issue resolved?
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3516

    Sep 12, 2014 5:38 AM GMT
    Ask fo 10 grand not to forward his communication to his wife, win win!
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    Sep 12, 2014 6:25 AM GMT
    Ohno saidClose your legs to married men girlfriend


    +1, as Nene from RHOA said! It's not cool to be a homewrecker.
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 12, 2014 6:34 AM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    meninlove said
    "You guys are really making strong points and I now realise that accepting his offer will ruin a lot of things and probably destroy a lot of hearts.."

    In can also deeply damage your own. A self inflicted wound is much harder to heal.

    You need a hug. *hug*

    And more [[[[ HUGZ ]]]]

    Is this issue resolved?


    lol nah I don't think mine will get damaged...I'm focusing on my studies way too much and I need some fun...I need a little bit of him just to up my life...


    I don't know if It's resolved yet the guy is still to call me...I just hope I'll have enough courage of telling him where the bus stop is at...I think maybe if I become just his friend I'll feel good about myself not that I have low-esteem but such a guy looks mature,he ain't gonna play games or so I hope so!!
  • Slender95

    Posts: 41

    Sep 12, 2014 6:38 AM GMT
    Apparition saidAsk fo 10 grand not to forward his communication to his wife, win win!


    haha nah 10 grand is way too little how bout I ask for R5000 every month for the same reason??
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    Sep 12, 2014 6:44 AM GMT
    Pukszen24 said..He knows nothing about me which makes it hard for me to believe his words....Oh he is married,He has 2 kids and he is over 30 and I'm just 19. I'm an independant person but this guy is cute and mascular....Should I just go with the flow and believe everything he says and ignore opinions of my friends and family??


    Well, let me ask you this. Are you trying to be your own msn in life&make your mark, or are you ok with cleaning houses for your sugar daddy. Totally&100% Up to you. THAT SAID, &if that IS YOU, 1st you need to tell this man you refuse to be a homewrecker&destroy a family. Dont forget, a sugar daddy ttained in this manner has no loyalty, only lust&he will throw you out as fast as he picked you up-just as soon as he tires of you, or when you start to or do age yourself. So keep that in mind..
    Then there is the issue of ..do YOU want to be a part of hutting a family because something 'seems' easier. Mych to learn young padawan..you have.
    Good luck
    (:
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    Sep 12, 2014 8:36 AM GMT
    Pukszen24 said
    Art_Deco said
    meninlove said
    "You guys are really making strong points and I now realise that accepting his offer will ruin a lot of things and probably destroy a lot of hearts.."

    In can also deeply damage your own. A self inflicted wound is much harder to heal.

    You need a hug. *hug*

    And more [[[[ HUGZ ]]]]

    Is this issue resolved?


    lol nah I don't think mine will get damaged...I'm focusing on my studies way too much and I need some fun...I need a little bit of him just to up my life...


    I don't know if It's resolved yet the guy is still to call me...I just hope I'll have enough courage of telling him where the bus stop is at...I think maybe if I become just his friend I'll feel good about myself not that I have low-esteem but such a guy looks mature,he ain't gonna play games or so I hope so!!


    Famous last words much?

    Seriously don't go near a married man its more hassle than its worth. I had to degrade myself by pretending I was doing odd jobs to 'keep me out of trouble' so the neighbours wouldn't question my presence. Mainly I gave him what he wanted and he got his car washed afterwards. Its not worth it.