Please help me!!! Boyfriend is freaking out from possible gonorrhea.

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    Sep 25, 2014 7:24 AM GMT
    I met my boyfriend almost exactly 3 months ago, and we both got tested for HIV, Gonorrhea and Chlamydia (urine samples), and Hep C last week. I got all my results back negative, and he got his HIV one back. The other ones are still waiting, but he said he should be fine, as he hadn't had sex with anyone else in a while. We had bareback sex for the first time (I bottomed) last weekend, but he started feeling sick and has penile discharge now (5 days later). I think I have a cold, so that he was feeling sick from that, or from eating something that upset his stomach.

    Now, he had been using enemas a lot when I'd top him before, and one time sex hurt him so much that we couldn't keep going. I think he might have gotten a tear in the rectum, and then maybe it got infected (said he was passing mucus when going to the restroom) and spread to his genitals. However, he went to the doctor and he said it's probably gonorrhea icon_exclaim.gif, e. coli, or thricomoniasis. We both freaked out, because then he would have gotten gonorrhea from me having it, and I have no symptoms!!! We have been doing rimming and he hadn't gotten sick, but I think that if it was e. coli, that it spread through oral after rimming.

    I also had bareback sex with a guy 5 months ago (that was dumb), but he said he was on PrEp, and I got tested 3 months later and then last week. Before meeting my boyfriend, I also gave a guy oral and rimmed him, so I wonder if he could have passed anything orally but without showing symptoms.

    Someone help me! I'm not a doctor but I need to know if I could have given him gonorrhea from being with either of those guys!!! I want to know if I probably have to do anal and throat swabs. We are both going crazy and he went on antibiotics today.
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    Sep 25, 2014 8:11 AM GMT
    1. Ask the guys with whom you slept with recently. Hopefully, they will let you know about whether they had any STDs or associated symptoms.

    2. Ask all these questions from your Doctor. He is the best person to calm you guys down.

    3. Instead of panicking and gulping pills, follow advice no. 2. Avoid having sex for a while, if you guys aren't sure what's exactly going on.

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    Sep 26, 2014 8:15 AM GMT
    A penile discharge is not normal, and is a symptom of something. He should get it checked out. Public health clinic should be the easiest.

    There is a lot one can catch from rimming strangers - not just what you mentioned. Usually there are symptoms, but not always. If his "sickness" doesn't pass soon, he might have something. But, if he is seeing a doc about his rectum and his penile discharge anyway . . . .
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    Sep 26, 2014 12:02 PM GMT
    Seems like there are a lot of variables here, including whether your new BF is being 100% monogamous, or has gotten himself infected from someone other than youself. Which now puts YOU at risk.

    Best advice is that you BOTH need complete medical workups, and perhaps both practice abstinence (solo masturbation should be OK) until all the tests are completed, and a few months have passed while taking any treatments the doctors prescribe. You might be passing things back and forth.

    "I also had bareback sex with a guy 5 months ago (that was dumb), but he said he was on PrEp..." The dumbest thing is basing unsafe sex on the verbal assurances of the other guy. Men will say anything to get laid. Safe Sex means assuming EVERY guy you meet has some kind of STI.
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    Sep 26, 2014 3:17 PM GMT
    "I had bareback sex with a guy because he said he was on PrEp" - icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Sep 26, 2014 5:13 PM GMT
    a doctor is the only one that can help you. and your safe practices in the future, of course.
  • Koaa2

    Posts: 1556

    Sep 26, 2014 5:49 PM GMT
    I think you said all your tests were neg, so he probably didn't get it from you. Having unprotected sex with someone you have known for only 3 months seems a little risky to me. I think you might want to get started on Prep yourself ASAP. Good luck.