Loneliness

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    Sep 27, 2014 6:27 PM GMT
    I'm lonely, and yeah, it's really getting me down. I meet lots of new people and have friends, but they're so absorbed in their lives/families/careers, that no one ever seems to have time for me any more.

    Thing is, I'm not a loner. I love people and socialising. In fact I'd say I'm a really nice guy to be around.

    Anyone else in the same boat? icon_confused.gif
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    Sep 27, 2014 6:32 PM GMT
    This is exactly like the thing people say about no matter what you have you can still be lonely.

    Personally people love my chatty and happy go lucky personality but no one ever sticks around, so yes i am.
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    Sep 27, 2014 6:45 PM GMT
    I did some silly online test about what is your theme song or something like that and this was the result :

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBR2G-iI3-I
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:10 PM GMT
    Your thread reminded me of this song:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QV8cOmsTdI

    used to like it
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:20 PM GMT
    Fuck I just started to remember all the old tunes and this one is also about loneliness

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHjNmyzrVvM

    I really liked this one, still a good tune
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:23 PM GMT
    Umm try to be absorbed in life/family/career too?
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:33 PM GMT
    I don't usually need people until I get bored.
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:44 PM GMT
    I'm more introvert than extrovert, so I can take a lot before I get lonely. Plus I have my best friend who is like my girlfriend-boyfriend.
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:45 PM GMT
    Im fairly introvert, there just comes a point when you do need a social life and people to be with.
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:46 PM GMT
    I'm in a very similar situation to what the OP describes. I have a professional relationship with many local folks who in other circumstances might be part of personal circle of friends. We can be friendly but ultimately I can't be friends with them . As for those nearby with whom I don't have a professional relationship --- yup, they're often cocooned with their families or obsessed with their work. My close friends live far away.
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:50 PM GMT
    We are social creatures and some of us are trapped and hurt and that creates further issues and affects that natural social instinct inside you.
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    Sep 27, 2014 7:51 PM GMT
    Sweetooth saidI'm more introvert than extrovert, so I can take a lot before I get lonely. Plus I have my best friend who is like my girlfriend-boyfriend.

    I'm the same way. I just do stuff with my bestie.
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:00 PM GMT
    silver_phoenix said^ You all complain about loneliness but claim you have friends and family.

    No boyfriend...?


    You can have loads of people around you and be lonely as it is a internal emotion.
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:06 PM GMT
    Alone time can be very productive ... learn to use and enjoy it.
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:08 PM GMT
    sf_swimmer saidAlone time can be very productive ... learn to use and enjoy it.
    True but when it seems a permanent thing its no fun
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:22 PM GMT
    Jms31 saidI'm lonely, and yeah, it's really getting me down. I meet lots of new people and have friends, but they're so absorbed in their lives/families/careers, that no one ever seems to have time for me any more.

    Thing is, I'm not a loner. I love people and socialising. In fact I'd say I'm a really nice guy to be around.

    Anyone else in the same boat? icon_confused.gif


    Tells my story too. Even worse when I go back to some people I knew for as much as twenty five years, they want nothing to do with me. I never did anything to them either, I just thought they would be happy to hear from me. Very depressing when that happens. If I didn't have beer right now I would go kill myself.
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:27 PM GMT
    silver_phoenix said
    cutelad89 said
    silver_phoenix said^ You all complain about loneliness but claim you have friends and family.

    No boyfriend...?


    You can have loads of people around you and be lonely as it is a internal emotion.


    Sure you could be sitting in the middle of a full to capacity arena and feel lonely. But when someone is claiming they have friends and family but are still lonely...?

    Must be the no boyfriend thing.


    Family, friends, acquaintances, boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband = that same arena.
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    Sep 27, 2014 8:33 PM GMT
    I think when you're young, you have all those hormones surging within you trying to get you to copulate...kind of difficult when you are gay and most of the people you know are not. It's only natural to feel isolated.

    It gets better.

    As you get older, you learn to appreciate your own company much more.
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    Sep 28, 2014 7:41 AM GMT
    Jms31 saidI'm lonely, and yeah, it's really getting me down. I meet lots of new people and have friends, but they're so absorbed in their lives/families/careers, that no one ever seems to have time for me any more.

    Thing is, I'm not a loner. I love people and socialising. In fact I'd say I'm a really nice guy to be around.

    Anyone else in the same boat? icon_confused.gif
    I'm lonely too. Most of us guys on here are lonely. But I do want to encourage you about something regarding your loneliness, you said that you have friends and family which means you are lonely because you can't find any of them you can relate to about your reality, but keep in mind there are really some guys in the world who are lonely who do not have family, friends, or anyone in their lives. They are just strong people surviving life until they die because they would not take the coward's way out of loneliness. So the old saying is true, "there is always someone worse off in life than you are." You should remember this fact.
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    Sep 28, 2014 10:09 AM GMT
    sf_swimmer saidAlone time can be very productive ... learn to use and enjoy it.

    Agreed.
    I fill my time with hobbies that I like to do. I enjoy it so much that I really like dedicating time to them and continue to do them even when I'm alone.
    That being said though I am naturally quite introverted but thankfully with my line of work I deal with people all the time so I know how to be social when it calls for it.
    Since I'm so naturally introverted I hardly ever feel alone even when I'm literally physically alone.

    I feel as though I get my social needs met at work that I relish any time I can get to myself.
    It's the best!!
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    Sep 29, 2014 5:40 PM GMT
    Jms31 saidI'm lonely, and yeah, it's really getting me down. I meet lots of new people and have friends, but they're so absorbed in their lives/families/careers, that no one ever seems to have time for me any more.

    Thing is, I'm not a loner. I love people and socialising. In fact I'd say I'm a really nice guy to be around.

    Anyone else in the same boat? icon_confused.gif
    I feel exactly the same way.
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    Sep 29, 2014 5:53 PM GMT
    u can be surrounded by people and feel like the only person in an empty room.

    Everyone gets these feelings. ur not alone! The thing im realizing with the world these days is people r so preoccupied with other things that they just arent putting much effort to getting to kno people beyond that superficial level.
  • toastvenom

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    Sep 29, 2014 6:50 PM GMT
    comes to show that in spite of all the new age crap thrown in our faces about self affirmation, blah, blah, blah external connections and acceptance is what truly validates us as human beings, that we are here and that we matter. affirmations are nothing more but a hypothesis u present to yourself but without the evidence to back it up all that it remains is just that, an idea
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    Sep 29, 2014 7:15 PM GMT
    keho92 saidu can be surrounded by people and feel like the only person in an empty room.

    Everyone gets these feelings. ur not alone! The thing im realizing with the world these days is people r so preoccupied with other things that they just arent putting much effort to getting to kno people beyond that superficial level.
    So true !
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    Sep 29, 2014 7:16 PM GMT
    Toastvenom saidcomes to show that in spite of all the new age crap thrown in our faces about self affirmation, blah, blah, blah external connections and acceptance is what truly validates us as human beings, that we are here and that we matter. affirmations are nothing more but a hypothesis u present to yourself but without the evidence to back it up all that it remains is just that, an idea
    Basically we still are animal in nature and need love and a social time