32 things I learned after coming out as gay, By Derek Schell

  • metta

    Posts: 39104

    Oct 10, 2014 2:02 AM GMT
    32 things I learned after coming out as gay
    By Derek Schell


    http://www.outsports.com/2014/10/9/6953179/derek-schell-gay-basketball-32-things-learned-coming-out-day
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    Oct 10, 2014 2:36 AM GMT
    Interesting. But as he says, some things are personal. Therefore, some of his points work for me, others do not.
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    Oct 10, 2014 2:12 PM GMT
    More evidence that homophobia is as much a fear of bring gay as peeps fearing homosexuality.
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    Oct 10, 2014 2:40 PM GMT
    While I agree in principle with most of what he says, a lot of what he says is a little naive but I give him slack because he is young and idealistic.

    Everyone's circumstances are different.

    For example,

    5) Delaying happiness is detrimental and only fills you with regret. There is no "right time." Every day is a chance to be authentic.

    Delaying happiness is not always detrimental nor does not always fill one with regret.

    I will concede that delaying or foregoing love will.

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    Oct 10, 2014 5:21 PM GMT
    This was his most important point in my opinion:

    "They wouldn’t understand" is a slippery slope of thought. Using this reasoning builds an illogical notion that you’re alone in your journey. Being open is the only way to give them a chance to understand.

    Even so, everyone is still alone in one's journey to a certain extent.
  • Sincityfan

    Posts: 409

    Oct 10, 2014 9:00 PM GMT
    Great photo of him. Looks very attractive there.
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    Oct 11, 2014 1:45 AM GMT
    sf_swimmer saidThis was his most important point in my opinion:

    "They wouldn’t understand" is a slippery slope of thought. Using this reasoning builds an illogical notion that you’re alone in your journey. Being open is the only way to give them a chance to understand.

    Even so, everyone is still alone in one's journey to a certain extent.



    It took me a year of marriage counseling to realize that his " they won't understand" is the most important point. Presuming you know what another person is thinking or feeling is the biggest mistake one can make. It's certainly not something that you should base your life on.
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    Oct 11, 2014 1:52 AM GMT
    Great story, but an even better backstory: Hillsdale College is a very rigorous school that emphasizes a traditional education in the Great Books and the classic liberal arts - and is roundly reviled by the left as - what else? - a "hateful" place and a "backward" institution. Nice to see that even coming out in the belly of this alleged beast was met with not just tolerance, but open acceptance and support. So much for another myth from the gay left and its handmaidens in pseudo-academia.
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    Oct 11, 2014 4:21 AM GMT
    Cloying nonsense.
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    Oct 11, 2014 3:39 PM GMT
    For me his most relevant point was "you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else" It seems there is so much self loathing in our community
    that causes us to rely on alcohol and drugs in a disproprtionate amount compared to the rest of society.
    Start by looking at the man in the mirror every day and declare, " you're a really good guy and a good contributor" and then go out and be that person.
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    Oct 11, 2014 5:57 PM GMT
    Excellent! Thanks for posting.
  • Ethan_1990

    Posts: 34

    Oct 12, 2014 2:17 AM GMT
    Inspirational. Needed to hear some of that.
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    Oct 25, 2014 5:59 PM GMT
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    Oct 30, 2014 10:34 PM GMT
    He's a bitter old queen. That's all he got. Mementos of days gone by...
    My favorite was second 10-year who was a "major, top earning television star".....Pfffffttttt.....un hunh...icon_rolleyes.gif

    Delusional. Would be funny if it weren't so pathetic.

    All part of narcissistic personality disorder. The pulitzer prize winners, the number one television earners in Hollywood, all the very top. Meanwhile, Alan accomplished nothing. Well, he stuck some bamboo clumps in the ground...