southbeach1500 saidTo me it seems like a big gamble, but others may have more tolerance to risk. Anyway, it's interesting.
Finding security only in money might indicate values and faith misplaced. Or likely you've never dealt with this situation.
My mom had left us instructions which included nursing home care. She got about the best money could buy. There were only two more expensive places, one down in Dade and another within our county but too far a drive. I wanted her closest to my sister-in-law who was the only of us not working then.
So mom was at a very top facility and had constant and continuous visits from her immediate family. I lived in fear the entire time. You can't be there 24/7 and mom didn't want us to do that. We even considered putting cameras in her room and even in her bathroom. But we decided mom wouldn't want that either. But that meant abuses could take place there without us seeing.
She did wind up with some marks on her arms when she became very frail, but that easily could have been from them handling her. It could simply have been from her fighting them keeping her clean and them holding on to her to make sure she didn't hurt herself or them. Not that she was violent but she had dementia and was dealing with people handling her nude body.
And not that she was a prude either. She always got massages and I had her masseur continue even in the nursing home so that mom would continue having human touch.
But people wiping her ass and showering her? OMG. So that's all horrible regardless of how much money or how great the facility, regardless of how much family visits. It's horrible.
When I get older, if I wind up with dementia and 1 out of 3 do, and if I miss my window to end my life, then I'll be there too only without someone like me to keep me even as safe as I kept my mom. I have no kids to do that for me. So my thinking is to minimize risk of elder abuse.
Just look at all the fucking ageism here, on this fucking forum. And that's just some little shits online with no power. Now imagine them in charge of your well-being. Yikes fucking yikes.
So the bigger gamble might very well be aging in place where elders are not respected, where caregivers are from homophobic countries, in societies where compassion is not highly valued.
So I think that what you call a big gamble might very well be a step towards reducing risk. And what you call an aversion to risk might simply mean that you'd be more comfortable taking a higher risk on being abused in more familiar territory then you'd be leaving your comfort zone to actually reduce risk and instead introduce to your life more compassion.