Poop

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 12:40 AM GMT
    (1) Do you look at your poop after you poop?

    (2) Do you sometimes closely examine it to determine:
    -(a) what those objects are that don't look like they were fully digested
    -(b) how long it took since the time you ate your food to end up in your poop

    (3) Do you ever record yourself pooping?

    (4) Do females run into your bathroom, strip naked, start pooping, look at you and say "well you're gay so I don't care" and then you rush to the internet to tell all your straight friends that they soooo wish they were gay right now because they could be looking at a hot female pooping right now and albeit it's not the best way to see a person naked it's still sexual nonetheless?

    (5) Do you sometimes see human-like or animal-like shapes to your poop and take a liking to it or does it spell out words (although it looks like an Asian language and you don't understand it and your gaysian friend isn't available or thinks you're crazy when you call and ask him what your Poop Haiku means)?

    (6) Do you have any poop questions?

    Poop Talk. Here on Jake Benson's thread of Poop

    Love,

    Poop

    Disclaimer: This thread was inspired by the caffinated beverage from Starbucks that I am currently drinking. I don't know what it is because when they asked what I wanted I said "can I have the gayest drink?" and all I remember was something about non-suger, soy, and lots of shots and a circuit party. And that's what inspired this thread. This lovely poop thread.
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    Jan 16, 2009 12:46 AM GMT
    I like to multitask when I poop.

    talk on the phone; browse the interwebs, read the comics.


    I just feel like if I don't do aynthing, there's a few minutes of my life I may neve get back.
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    Jan 16, 2009 12:49 AM GMT
    Funkapottomous,

    You bring up a very good point and a very integrated part of pooping. Yes, pooping takes a very long time, especially if the circumference of your excriments greatly exceed that of your sphincter. With that said, pooping is just about the only time that is boring and long enough that I'm inspired to take out one of my text books from college and start reading. And then sure enough that bores me so much before I know I'm all done pooping. AMAZING!!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 5:58 AM GMT
    fast-acting_large.jpg

    I remember staying in hotel rooms so fancy that they had telephones by the toilet. But now that I have one in my pocket, I kinda make it a point never to answer the phone on the toilet. None of the potential sound effects are conducive to conducting business. I mean, if it happened to be an unhappy customer calling to complain or cancel, a big flushing noise might be appropriate. But that's not usually what I'm hoping for.
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    Jan 16, 2009 6:00 AM GMT
    wtf icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 6:00 AM GMT
    Funkapottomous saidI like to multitask when I poop.

    talk on the phone
    My sister used to talk to me on the phone while she was in the bathroom, drove me ficking NUTS, I dont' wanna be talking on no gawd damned phone while someones doing there business, especially my bloody sister.. ugh..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 10:22 AM GMT
    omg i haven't really come down from my coffee high yet. I should have done cardio! This is no good. icon_eek.gificon_sad.gif
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    Jan 16, 2009 5:30 PM GMT
    lilTanker said
    Funkapottomous saidI like to multitask when I poop.

    talk on the phone
    My sister used to talk to me on the phone while she was in the bathroom, drove me ficking NUTS, I dont' wanna be talking on no gawd damned phone while someones doing there business, especially my bloody sister.. ugh..
    well it's not like they can tell; unless you flush or the conversation goes as follows:



    "Hello?"
    "Hey; what's up?"
    "Ah, not much. You know; just poopin'."
    "o.O"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 5:41 PM GMT
    thanks for the magic of the iphone i can do anythying when poopying, pay my bills, send some text, or post in this forum icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 8:25 PM GMT
    Um... ehm... are you pooping right now while posting this?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 8:43 PM GMT
    Sedative saidUm... ehm... are you pooping right now while posting this?
    are you kidding? I never leave the bathroom!

    asleep.jpg
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    Jan 16, 2009 8:50 PM GMT
    Miss Babcock? Is that you?

  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Jan 16, 2009 8:51 PM GMT
    The quality of RJ posts has really gone down the toilet lately.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 8:53 PM GMT
    It has been a shitty day and reading this forum has confirmed it for me. icon_twisted.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2009 8:55 PM GMT
    Funkapottomous said
    lilTanker said
    Funkapottomous saidI like to multitask when I poop.

    talk on the phone
    My sister used to talk to me on the phone while she was in the bathroom, drove me ficking NUTS, I dont' wanna be talking on no gawd damned phone while someones doing there business, especially my bloody sister.. ugh..
    well it's not like they can tell; unless you flush or the conversation goes as follows:



    "Hello?"
    "Hey; what's up?"
    "Ah, not much. You know; just poopin'."
    "o.O"

    Oh but you can.. step into a bathroom and talk.... a bathroom is full of tiles, solid walls and solid surfaces, its very bright, so, it echos icon_sad.gif
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    Jan 16, 2009 11:11 PM GMT
    lilTanker said
    Funkapottomous said
    lilTanker said
    Funkapottomous saidI like to multitask when I poop.

    talk on the phone
    My sister used to talk to me on the phone while she was in the bathroom, drove me ficking NUTS, I dont' wanna be talking on no gawd damned phone while someones doing there business, especially my bloody sister.. ugh..
    well it's not like they can tell; unless you flush or the conversation goes as follows:



    "Hello?"
    "Hey; what's up?"
    "Ah, not much. You know; just poopin'."
    "o.O"

    Oh but you can.. step into a bathroom and talk.... a bathroom is full of tiles, solid walls and solid surfaces, its very bright, so, it echos icon_sad.gif


    so?

    people might think you're in a concert hall.


    "hello? o? o? o?"
    "is Andy in....a concert hall? I had no idea he was so fancy!"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 17, 2009 12:12 AM GMT
    Delivis saidThe quality of RJ posts has really gone down the toilet lately.


    i love a good poop pun.
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    Jan 17, 2009 11:22 AM GMT
    blinktwice4y said
    Delivis saidThe quality of RJ posts has really gone down the toilet lately.


    i love a good poop pun.


    Ummm ya what they saidicon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 17, 2009 12:21 PM GMT
    Holy Crap

    499607741_c731b83c86.jpg?v=0
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    Jan 17, 2009 1:07 PM GMT
    rawr saidhere, have another bump.

    god knows, you're already riding that "coffee" pretty hard to come up with this crap. icon_cool.gif


    I am NOT drinking Starbucks coffee again. And not drinking coffee in mid-afternoon when I have to work the next morning. Those are definitely two mistakes. Although I started working on a song and can't finish it now. So now I have to drink more coffee in order to feel motivated again. DAMN YOU COFFEE!

    Anyway, you guys are talking a lot of shit!

    /pun
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    Jan 17, 2009 1:10 PM GMT
    Funkapottomous said
    so?

    people might think you're in a concert hall.

    "hello? o? o? o?"
    "is Andy in....a concert hall? I had no idea he was so fancy!"


    Really? A hello with three "o"s reflecting back? That would mean that you're pooping in a giant stadium, concert hall, cavernous cave, but definitely not a bathroom. Not even the largest bathroom in the world.

    /sound acoustics guru
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    Jan 17, 2009 7:18 PM GMT
    Yeah, but I can hear the bassoon and the tuba warming up
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    Jan 18, 2009 6:29 AM GMT
    mindgarden saidYeah, but I can hear the bassoon and the tuba warming up
    that's no tuba.


    It's a euphonium!
    2003_2649.JPG

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 18, 2009 8:50 AM GMT
    LOL omg, jakebenson, were you bored out of your mind before you post this? i mean nobody would go down to that level just to talk about poops~! but i had good laugh from this, so keep posting something ridiculous funny threads that only you dare to do. bravo, jakebenson, bravo~~! icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 18, 2009 9:18 AM GMT
    I had a poop once, but it's gone and I miss iticon_cry.gif