Being the "weird" guy

  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Oct 25, 2014 2:17 AM GMT
    This has always been on my mind ever since I've observed the online dating scene. I usually see things listed as "don't be a weirdo" or "no weirdos" and I'm pretty sure there is a general consensus, I just can't help but wonder what exactly makes a weirdo in your opinion.

    I've always been thought of as the "weird" kid due to how I never really talked a lot, my sense of style (which I guess I can understand), and my outdated tastes in things. But disbarring the latter two, I never talked a lot because I didn't have anything worth saying, at least, that's how I felt.

    But yeah anyway, in your opinion, what makes you think of someone as a weirdo/weird?
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    Oct 25, 2014 3:06 AM GMT
    When someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.
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    Oct 25, 2014 4:09 AM GMT
    BloodFlame saidThis has always been on my mind ever since I've observed the online dating scene. I usually see things listed as "don't be a weirdo" or "no weirdos" and I'm pretty sure there is a general consensus, I just can't help but wonder what exactly makes a weirdo in your opinion.

    I've always been thought of as the "weird" kid due to how I never really talked a lot, my sense of style (which I guess I can understand), and my outdated tastes in things. But disbarring the latter two, I never talked a lot because I didn't have anything worth saying, at least, that's how I felt.

    But yeah anyway, in your opinion, what makes you think of someone as a weirdo/weird?


    Disclaimer: You probably know to take anything I say with a grain of salt. But until better advice comes along, I'll pick apart the language a little bit...

    I read this as meaning one of three things:

    A. "I'm judgmental." Not surprising in the dating world, especially amongst people as young and attractive as you. On the bright side, this is not universal (just not uncommon).

    B. "Don't be anything I'm not personally into." Again, not surprising in the dating world, but more in a stating-the-obvious-without-actually-helping sort of way.

    C. "Don't expect me to be into any kinks or fetishes." Possibly even a good thing to look for if you're still working on finding your types, and *especially* if this category didn't come to mind when you saw the word "weirdo".

    In the end, your job is still to give whomever makes your initial cut enough of a chance to know whether they're your type and/or good for you, and not be *too* hurt when you realize they are doing the same thing. So nothing to worry about per se.

    But at any rate, when I've heard people describe "weird" dates in person, I've often heard it meaning some combination of possessive, narcissistic, flamboyant, obnoxious, obsessive, and/or dramatic -- in short, somebody who makes a date excruciatingly uncomfortable and/or won't let it end well. So I really don't think any of them are talking about people like you.
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    Oct 25, 2014 4:27 AM GMT
    BloodFlame saidBut yeah anyway, in your opinion, what makes you think of someone as a weirdo/weird?
    Anyone who's willing to hang out with me in person.
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    Oct 25, 2014 9:10 AM GMT
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    take him for example
  • frogman89

    Posts: 418

    Oct 25, 2014 9:33 AM GMT
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    Then you are the weird guy.
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    Oct 25, 2014 10:23 AM GMT
    Being weird means you don't look like other people, it means you're unique.
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    Oct 25, 2014 11:22 AM GMT
    Someone who's not conventional or cookie cutter. In terms of the dating scene it's guys who don't fit in with any of the accepted gay subcultures I guess or falls into the more marginalized ones.

    It's a compliment really but it does decrease your dating pool unfortunately.
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    Oct 25, 2014 12:28 PM GMT
    That hair..not workin
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    Oct 25, 2014 2:01 PM GMT
    frogman89 said
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    Then you are the weird guy.

    How I act abnormally? Im one of the most level headed posters around here.
  • frogman89

    Posts: 418

    Oct 25, 2014 2:42 PM GMT
    David3K said
    frogman89 said
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    Then you are the weird guy.

    How I act abnormally? Im one of the most level headed posters around here.

    Keep on dreaming.
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    Oct 25, 2014 4:02 PM GMT
    frogman89 said
    David3K said
    frogman89 said
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    Then you are the weird guy.

    How I act abnormally? Im one of the most level headed posters around here.

    Keep on dreaming.
    I remember you: youre the guy that wouldn't celebrate the World Cup even though youre german, icon_lol.gif Whos the weirdo?
  • Dg75

    Posts: 8

    Oct 25, 2014 6:15 PM GMT
    I've been called odd plenty of times. It is mostly because I love comic books and super heroes so much. I would rather spend a Friday night reading comic books on the floor than going out and hanging with people in a social setting. The social scene has grown less and less important as I have gotten older and I have lost many supposed gay friends because I don't like to go out. Do I let it bother me? Sometimes it can be distressing to know people consider me odd, but then I realize that I haven't done anything wrong and I have nothing to be ashamed of.
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    Oct 25, 2014 6:22 PM GMT
    frogman89 said
    David3K said
    frogman89 said
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    Then you are the weird guy.

    How I act abnormally? Im one of the most level headed posters around here.

    Keep on dreaming.


    I thought the same thing, I just thought - ''according to you''
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    Oct 25, 2014 6:28 PM GMT
    Being different or creative does not make a weirdo. Being uncomfortable with yourself or knowingly inflicting injustices upon others makes people weird.

    For example: Someone with body odor, even a homeless person who has no bathing facility, is not necessarily a weirdo. But someone who purposely farts next to others is always weird.
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    Oct 25, 2014 6:28 PM GMT
    I say the weirder the better!!!

    Weirdos are always the ones that cure diseases, invent things that change the world and create great Art.

    The "normal" people are always too busy blending into the woodwork to do anything very interesting...
  • edcomplex

    Posts: 3

    Oct 25, 2014 6:30 PM GMT
    Dg75 saidI've been called odd plenty of times. It is mostly because I love comic books and super heroes so much. I would rather spend a Friday night reading comic books on the floor than going out and hanging with people in a social setting. The social scene has grown less and less important as I have gotten older and I have lost many supposed gay friends because I don't like to go out. Do I let it bother me? Sometimes it can be distressing to know people consider me odd, but then I realize that I haven't done anything wrong and I have nothing to be ashamed of.


    Don't bother a person like that. If that's what you like to do, enjoy it. You need a "Quality" friends not "Quantity". But you need to find that "Quality" in "Quantity" ofc. So knowing new people won't harm you. Maybe you not into bar or club much? Why not do other outside activities tho??
  • Dg75

    Posts: 8

    Oct 25, 2014 6:45 PM GMT


    I like climate control so don't like outdoor activities. I am not sports minded at all. I run everyday and even then I use the treadmill. I just prefer being by myself or having 1 or 2 people at most in a quiet setting.
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    Oct 25, 2014 7:02 PM GMT
    For a lot of people a weirdo is just someone who doesn't fit into their narrow confines of what they consider acceptable. They are usually boring individuals straitjacketed by societal norms.
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    Oct 25, 2014 8:37 PM GMT
    eh im pretty weird. people say im weird but in a funny way.. apparently i dont have much inhibition wen i talk to people or strangers.. like jus now i had a 2 hour conversation on the porch with my 47 year old neighbour that i just met and drank lemonade.. lol extremely random how i was walking by and complimented her on her cute dog. randomness to me is weird.. i gave candy out during halloween on the bus last year to strangers that wore costumes and people on the street :s and people thought that was weird.. (i had a lot of candy because i got it free from a cadbury factory event)

    so random acts = weird.. and apparently makes it funny as well ^_^
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    Oct 25, 2014 8:45 PM GMT
    morphic said
    David3K saidWhen someone acts abnormally and not in s cool or funny way.

    take him for example


    I can't help but notice you've become very bitchy since you hid your profile pic. icon_confused.gif
  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Oct 25, 2014 9:12 PM GMT
    Interesting views everyone. And thanks for the feedback, I guess I have a general idea of what's expected.

    I personally can't help being the unconventional type person I am. I feel life would be boring if I tried to fit into the cookie cutter expectations people expect me to follow so I'll just continue to be me with my love of art, music, and trying to understand the quirks of the world.
  • BlackRussian1...

    Posts: 323

    Oct 25, 2014 10:01 PM GMT
    What many people deem "weird" I consider interesting and worth my attention. I'm one of those "weird" gay men who has nearly made peace with the fact that most of my gay brethren don't get me (or me then!), so it's fine. Most people are too scared to think for themselves, be unconventional, and to be unique. Just rest assured: the freaks/weirdos are out there, you just have to sort through the sea of clones to find them.
  • josephmovie

    Posts: 533

    Oct 25, 2014 10:13 PM GMT
    To me, there's different types of weird.

    There's Good Weird, which is people who are less self conscious than most and just do their thing despite current trends and expectations.

    Then there's Social Weird, which is those people who can't seem to function normally in a social or employment setting. They often have a high opinion of themselves. As they get older, they end out living with parents and not working because hey, they're too much of a genius for that sort of thing.

    Then there's Bad Weird, which is the sort of person you get a bad vibe from for no apparent reason. It's just an instinctual thing.
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    Oct 25, 2014 10:13 PM GMT
    I like weirdos.

    But as someone said: the haircut doesn't work for you (it wouldn't work for anyone IMO).