First time meeting a guy from a phone app (scruff)

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 29, 2014 1:33 AM GMT
    I recently decided to download scruff and since I uploaded a profile picture my phone has kept me busy. There is a guy I messaged first on there and is about 30 miles away. Our chats have been great. We sent multiple pics to each other. He says he wants to meet me, kiss me etc.

    Now the problem is that I checked out his instagram account which has several recent and old pics of him with another man. This led me to the other man's instagram and I am certain these guys are either together or just recently broken up like in the last week. So either they did break up, have an open relationship, or want to lure me into some fun between them.

    Any advice on whether I should meet him and any other precautions other than a public place?
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    Oct 29, 2014 1:44 AM GMT
    just use your best judgement. as with anything out there, there are bound to be fakes. ask to meet in a public place and if he is defiant, then it probably isn't worth it.
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    Oct 29, 2014 10:29 AM GMT
    When you are in the middle of a conversation and he is responding quickly, ask him if he is in a relationship. If he doesn't answer straight away with a no, the answer is yes.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Oct 29, 2014 9:38 PM GMT
    Ya, I'd just ask him. Tell him you were checking him out and the whole story. If he has nothing to hide, he won't mind being checked out. My partner and I certainly did before meeting.
  • Kovyn

    Posts: 117

    Oct 30, 2014 12:05 AM GMT
    Grindr > scruff
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    Oct 30, 2014 12:21 AM GMT
    Ohno saidWhen you are in the middle of a conversation and he is responding quickly, ask him if he is in a relationship. If he doesn't answer straight away with a no, the answer is yes.


    First, thank you all for the responses. Ohno I did what you suggested. I mentioned instagram and asked if he was in a relationship. He quickly replied this was probably one of his best friends. I explained that I found this other man via facebook given his instagram name and he has numerous pictures of them together. He replied that they have been best friends since high school. When I asked, he admitted they do live together. We will see, but have not heard from him in awhile. To me, the key is he did not say NO directly to the relationship question.
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    Oct 30, 2014 7:30 AM GMT
    UKPharmboy said
    Ohno saidWhen you are in the middle of a conversation and he is responding quickly, ask him if he is in a relationship. If he doesn't answer straight away with a no, the answer is yes.


    First, thank you all for the responses. Ohno I did what you suggested. I mentioned instagram and asked if he was in a relationship. He quickly replied this was probably one of his best friends. I explained that I found this other man via facebook given his instagram name and he has numerous pictures of them together. He replied that they have been best friends since high school. When I asked, he admitted they do live together. We will see, but have not heard from him in awhile. To me, the key is he did not say NO directly to the relationship question.


    My bet is that you don't hear from him again, or at least not for a long time. On the plus side you have proven you have what it takes to be a detective in the police if you ever fancy a change of career!