Brokenhearted dreams

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2014 9:34 AM GMT
    Do you ever have dreams where you are being dumped or you are having a fight with your BF/EX and you feel the raw cut feelings you thought you once lost?

    I had a dream last night I was on a holiday to phuket with a guy that I kind of have a crush on but hes straight but we were sharing the same hotel room, anyways he said he was going out to get something to eat and I just so happened to see him on a security camera hooking up with a guy of all people and I was so freaking jealous lol I woke up feeling so pissed off even though it was a dream but they always mess with my head....Its like my subconsciousness knows how to torture me and it makes me so afraid of rejection which is funny because the conscious me *the person who I project is the complete opposite*

    I met my second boyfriend and we slept together the same night we met and we slept in the same bed together every night we were never apart.....the second night I slept with him I had a dream that we were having a fight in the middle of the street and we were yelling at each other and when I woke up It felt that I was in that situation right then even though I had just woken up next to the guy I was smitten with I was so angry at him and the rest of the day at work I felt like I was an over caffeinated, shaking blubbering mess.....anyways long story short my dream was prophesied a year later in the same location and I was feeling that exact same feeling I felt a year ago when I woke up from that dream....I have had a lot of nightmares in my lifetime but these kinds of dreams leave the worst dreamy residue lol.....My brother and I were sharing a bed and he told me I screamed out in the middle of the night "stop laughing at me"! I don't remember the dream but I do think that subconsiously I take myself seriously and I don't like being made a fool of.
  • Bowyn_Aerrow

    Posts: 357

    Nov 04, 2014 10:40 AM GMT
    Since these sorts of dreams tend to crop up when you have an interest in a person (Even if its just a friendship, you are still interested in them, and their rejecting you will hurt) its clear you already have "issues" with either loss or rejection. And since you said "it makes me so afraid of rejection" it clear you already have a basic understanding of the root cause.

    I have PTSD and part of that is reoccurring nightmares surrounding the trauma events. While some of those dreams are replaying the same event like a film, often enough I have dreams where the story is being played out but with different actors, different settings, different situations which are 'variations on a theme'.

    From what you said it sounds like you are having a similar problem, your brain is trying to work out an event, or fear or something thus is running this simulation over and over again trying to plot a solution.

    The brain tries to make sense of stuff, it always seeks to plot a solution to problems. If it cannot find a solution, it will work on that problem and try different things to find a solution.

    Dreams are the brain's way of running simulations, even rerun over past events to analyze and work through the problem.

    There is a disconnect between the two main parts of the brain. The large hind brain (animal brain) which is older and holds instincts, emotions and other useful 'animal' stuff. And the smaller fore brain which is the seat of reason.

    While it is smaller it tries to dominate, and it does something the hind brain doesn't - demands sense out of the senseless, demands resolution, demands to be satisfied that a solution has been found for every problem. yes including the unresolvable emotional conflicts such as rejection is real and is always a risk.

    Since this is such a problem that its leading to screaming in your sleep (which is no laughing matter) you may want to seriously consider learning more about fear of rejection and finding ways to work through that. https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=how+to+manage+fear+of+rejection is a start

    Also fear of abandonment: https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=how+to+manage+fear+of+abandonment

    Goes close in hand.

    You should also monitor the occurrences of such dreams.

    Perhaps keep a notebook and pen close to your bed and jot down the particulars of such dreams. Simply writing it down may lead to break through for you brain to process the issue. I know for certain it works with trauma based events since I have had several major breakthroughs and many minor ones when I did 'dream journaling'.

    You are not a fool. Many people have 'something' that perturbs their sleep, something that 'haunts' their dreams.

    And its good to take ones self seriously sometimes.





  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2014 10:55 AM GMT
    Wow totally was not expecting that comment after I just watched a youtube movie about Michou kaku talking about the three levels of our brain and he said the back of the brain was reptillian which is the level 1 consciousness, middle brain is level 2 Monkey consciousness and the front of our brain is level 3 human consciousness which devloped over years of evolution I guess.... And he said that our human consciousness has a need to generate simulations to predict the future which is something no other animal can do....and all this time I thought it was all because my moon is in scorpio why I was having these dreams lol...

    thanks heaps for those links I'll definately be having a read and I do have a dream log! thanks for reminding me I haven't put anything down for a few months.
  • Bowyn_Aerrow

    Posts: 357

    Nov 04, 2014 11:25 AM GMT
    You're welcome.

    Sleep well and pleasant dreams - ok?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 05, 2014 2:18 AM GMT
    So prophet.

    Reminds me of the guy that got a geek answer in a dream then got the Nobel