How to look like the perfect twink?

  • infinitefrien...

    Posts: 376

    Nov 04, 2014 3:35 PM GMT
    What steps should be taken?
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    Nov 04, 2014 3:36 PM GMT
    drop out of high school
    move to NYC
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    Nov 04, 2014 8:29 PM GMT
    Weigh about 30 pounds.

    Smear your entire body with baby lotion.

    Get rid of your butt hair with laser.

    Get a sugar daddy.
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    Nov 05, 2014 1:08 AM GMT
    well I think that if you are serious about this, a twinkologist would be the one to consult on this issue. good luck.
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    Nov 05, 2014 1:26 AM GMT
    For starters, you need to turn yourself from a Cat back to a human.... LOL. Not that I wouldn't want to be a cat In my next life, since I have 2 spoiled shits at home as I speak...
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    Nov 05, 2014 1:28 AM GMT
    davidingeorgia saidFor starters, you need to turn yourself from a Cat back to a human.... LOL. Not that I wouldn't want to be a cat In my next life, since I have 2 spoiled shits at home as I speak...


    icon_lol.gif the RJ quote of the year so far.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Nov 05, 2014 1:28 AM GMT
    Put your energy into healthy self improvement not some fantasy about a twink....
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    Nov 05, 2014 1:57 AM GMT
    Never eat anything. Never lift anything. Get a fake tan. Wear bronzer. Bleach your hair and your teeth. Shave everything. Run on the treadmill for hours a day.

    Am I forgetting anything?
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    Nov 05, 2014 2:04 AM GMT
    The sarcastic man is hot
  • Bowyn_Aerrow

    Posts: 357

    Nov 05, 2014 2:33 AM GMT
    Pick the right parents next go round.

    Its all in the genes.

  • Nov 05, 2014 3:08 AM GMT
    Look like me.

    Genetically modify your biological crasis to that of a hairless sphinx cat.

    Sacrifice a 47-year old virgin living atop the Himalayas, to the gods of Hollister, Vaseline and BIC razors.
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    Nov 05, 2014 3:15 AM GMT
    genetics, i don't even lift that much and everyone thinks i do lol
  • jaroslav123

    Posts: 600

    Nov 05, 2014 3:14 PM GMT
    10 Tips to Being the "Perfect Twink".

    1. Buy as many vests as possible.
    2. Don't have a personality. Instead every time somebody talks to you, simply quote a line from a crappy pop-song, but do it in a way to suggest that you think it's deep (like quoting Wilde or Sartre).
    3. Don't eat for a month. Following this, simply eat soup everyday.
    4. Dye your hair a colour which probably doesn't appear on the colour-spectrum. That's right bitch: you've dyed your hair and you've invented a new colour.
    5. Bash your head against a wall to kill off any brain-cells - you won't be needing them for a long time, honey.
    6. Buy eye-liner (or as those hip metropolitans call it: "guy-liner"). Apply as much make-up to your face as possible - to the extent that you don't have a face, and instead above your neck is simply just a slab of solid chemical.
    7. Only go to the gym to develop a bubble-butt.
    8. Learn to "slut-drop".
    9. Via deed-poll, get your name changed to something hip and suitably ridiculous like "AJ Slut-tastic" or "Johnny Rapid".
    10. Change your digestive system via intense plastic-surgery so that you have the "intriguing" capability to be able to shit glitter and piss out rainbows.
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    Nov 05, 2014 3:28 PM GMT
    pazzy saidyou sure have a lot of time on your hands, breh. like what a few other posters on here have done with your screenname. you certainly love to spam web forums with questions since this ain't the only place you do it at. icon_wink.gif



    The irony
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    Nov 06, 2014 1:02 PM GMT
    kxd7 said
    pazzy saidyou sure have a lot of time on your hands, breh. like what a few other posters on here have done with your screenname. you certainly love to spam web forums with questions since this ain't the only place you do it at. icon_wink.gif



    The irony

    Look who is talking, fatass sitting on his ass making tons of fake profiles to abuse people. Yeah this is the real IRONY.
  • B71115

    Posts: 482

    Nov 07, 2014 2:42 AM GMT
    Put your left leg behind your left ear.
    Put your right leg behind your right ear.