Being Oblivious

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 04, 2014 1:58 PM GMT
    I know I can't be the only one who has this problem. I'm apparently completely oblivious to what constitutes "flirting" or "being hit on". I work part-time at a high-end retail chain and had just finished helping a customer when a coworker came up and said something along the lines of "Wow, he was hitting on you so hard!"

    I hadn't a clue.

    Seriously, can we come up with some little system to let people know? Like wearing a ribbon around our belt or something?
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4433

    Dec 04, 2014 5:15 PM GMT
    Happens in a workplace setting. Your mind is just not on sex but rather just doing your job. My guess is you'd notice if it was a guy you find attractive.
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    Dec 04, 2014 5:33 PM GMT
    his bad; he should have adjusted the level of flirt to the environment and the response. His boy friend was watching?
    -Every male employee at a high end retail employ is gay.
    -working retail every compliment is appreciated maybe not acted on.
  • muscleboundfe...

    Posts: 392

    Dec 04, 2014 6:38 PM GMT
    I'm the same way. I also use to be a huge flirt without realizing it lol. Oh well if he was truly interested he'd man up and ask you out.
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    Dec 04, 2014 9:21 PM GMT
    I'm completely oblivious. I suppose that means they need step their game up if they want me to notice. Lol.
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    Dec 04, 2014 9:27 PM GMT
    muscleboundfem saidI'm the same way. I also use to be a huge flirt without realizing it lol. Oh well if he was truly interested he'd man up and ask you out.

    I once did man up, and was waiting for this guy at the front door of my office, who was having some meeting with my boss. But then when he came out of the front door, I froze. icon_neutral.gif
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    Dec 04, 2014 10:19 PM GMT
    I am oblivious to a lot of things but not being hit on.When I am on public transportation or shopping.I tune out and ignore everyone.So I dont notice much around me.Always been like that.
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    Dec 05, 2014 12:14 AM GMT
    Happens to me a few time. Often my head is in the clouds and it's only brought to my attention when a friend tells me it happened.
  • davfit

    Posts: 309

    Dec 05, 2014 12:25 AM GMT
    has happened to me, but When I'm working I'm totally focused on work.. some peoples Brains just work thay way.. don't
    knock yourself. ..flirting at work not cool..
  • NoFLFitGuy

    Posts: 44

    Dec 05, 2014 3:32 AM GMT
    Riko_sal saidHappens to me a few time. Often my head is in the clouds and it's only brought to my attention when a friend tells me it happened.


    That happened to me, a lot more when I was younger, but still does now. I am so bad, friends would make a game out of it - they would count how many times I was "cruised" or "hit on" and see how many of them I would never noticed. It was usually like 95% of them that I had no clue about.

    But, I agree with the others above - work is for work, not for flirting etc. "Never mix business with pleasure" has a lot of real world applications.
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    Dec 05, 2014 4:52 AM GMT
    Someone could write my name in the sky a la "Surrender Dorothy" and I still wouldn't clue in.
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 872

    Dec 05, 2014 6:29 AM GMT
    Cruising a dude who is at work in a high end retail store as opposed to cruising someone who works in an openly gay business is a bit of a tacky deal. Sure, people will flirt with other people who may be at work, no matter what we say here. Now, it is really up to them to tune their act appropriately.

    Nope, this ain't rocket science. Many businesses maintain a client database. So, I usually hand my private business card over, say, "Nice talking with you. Thanks for helping me out with my purchases here. Give me a ring if you want to meet up for drinks tomorrow evening at ...".

    If you turn off all the obvious flirting that everyone else can see from a mile away, and act quickly and decisively making sure that no one else gets to hear your private invitation, lots of good things happenicon_lol.gif

    SC
  • DarkWoods

    Posts: 91

    Dec 05, 2014 7:25 AM GMT
    I'm usually oblivious when people are interested in me. My work experience has been retail, and I was usually focused on making sales and keeping my numbers up. It was more difficult to break script and flirt at my previous jobs than at my current one which has less pressure on sales and encourages friendly conversation with customers.

    If you think the employee is cute then you have to be the one to make a move or leave/get a phone number. If the employee takes a risk and flirts with a customer who is not interested and makes them uncomfortable or they are caught it could cost their job. The customer has to be the one to make the first move to break through the professional barrier.

    I found it shocking when a guy I dated revealed that he had a crush on me for a while before we finally went out. I had known he was gay, but still had no idea of his interest since all our interactions were when I was on the clock. Sometimes employees will tell me that a customer was flirting with me and I'm surprised.

    Another time there was a guy who was extra nice and I was pretty sure he was into me. He gave me his phone number, but then made it creepy by adding his hotel room number. I went to the restroom (the one at my work is weird in that the urinal is in a stall with a door lock) and he followed me inside and made a move to enter the stall with me. Don't be a super creep.
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    Dec 05, 2014 10:32 AM GMT
    I am completely oblivious to flirting or being hit on... I often mistake it for people being nice or friendly. But if my husband is around when it happens, he'll tell me afterwards... LOL.
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    Dec 05, 2014 6:59 PM GMT
    Yea, unless someone tells me I'm being hit on, I would never figure it out. Being from the midwest, guys are usually just gentlemen-like so I just assume the guy is being a gentlemen.
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    Dec 06, 2014 7:41 PM GMT
    I'm apparently quite clueless too.
  • LutheranGuy

    Posts: 30

    Dec 06, 2014 9:49 PM GMT
    Some people are just friendly. Never be afraid to be friendly back. If there is interest either way beyond that, it's not going to be in the subtle things like asking how your day was or introducing themselves. It's going to be something that indicates persistence.

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    Dec 07, 2014 12:34 AM GMT
    I was a little bit clueless when I first came out on the scene. Over the years, you just develop an Intuition of when someone hits on you. Beside the obvious winking, smiling, touching, holding hand or getting touchy feely, but yeah I try not to lead guys on if I'm not interested unless I really want awkward Tensions. LOL JK... Oh well, the one thing I learned in gay-dating is there'll be guys who like or even love you and some gays will just hate you for no reason. You can't please everybody.