Describe Your Biggest "Asshole Moment"

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 1:58 AM GMT
    Like the title says!

    So this tiny gay kid on facebook's been bothering the living shit out of me for the past few days... finally catches me on the chat:

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    7:31pm Giovanni

    hey

    whats up
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    7:31pm Logan

    hey man

    bouncing between here and work
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    7:32pm Giovanni

    thats cool i guess
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    7:32pm Logan

    working on a singular instance of Microsoft SQL Server 2008 and it's being a fucking bear
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    7:33pm Giovanni

    its being a bear?

    lol ok
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    7:33pm Logan

    it's a fucking pig, hogging all my RAM, and all the queries are running slow as cold molasses and I'm trying to figure out why
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    7:34pm Giovanni

    well im good with computer so i could help u with that

    but only for a price lol
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    7:34pm Logan

    it's a setting I fucked up somewhere in here, I'll find it

    what's your take on non-threaded operating systems?
    ----------------------------
    7:35pm Giovanni

    a laptop

    um
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    7:35pm Logan

    sounds like you really know your shit, huh?
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    7:35pm Giovanni

    lol sry im tired
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    7:36pm Logan

    sounds like you should get to sleep icon_razz.gif
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    7:36pm Giovanni

    so im guessing u work out a lot
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    7:36pm Logan

    really, what makes you think that?
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    7:36pm Giovanni

    cuz of ur pictures lol
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    7:37pm Logan

    I guess it's good to know I register on film
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    7:37pm Giovanni

    what u mean?
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    7:38pm Logan

    exactly as I said it, word for word
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    7:38pm Giovanni

    ok lol

    i am so fuckin bored
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    7:39pm Logan

    you could go get yourself a linux desktop, that's always fun to play with
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    7:39pm Giovanni

    yea i bet
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    7:39pm Logan

    you can get more done in 4 lines on linux than with 40 lines in windows

    go figure
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    7:41pm Logan

    anyway, sounds like I need to let you get your butt in bed

    have a good one ;)
    ----------------------------
    7:41pm Giovanni

    i dont like sleeping

    i have a big bed and no one to share it with
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    7:42pm Logan

    grab a body pillow, they work wonders
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    7:42pm Giovanni

    well they dont have a dick and u cant kissm them
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    7:43pm Logan

    you're in New York and I'm in Texas, how's that gonna fix your problem?
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    7:43pm Giovanni

    aha yea it cant
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    7:44pm Logan

    exactly
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    7:44pm Giovanni

    well than maybe i should stop by
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    7:45pm Logan

    and I'm guessing at roughly age 18 you're gonna somehow have enough money to blow on an at least $600 plane ticket?
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    7:45pm Giovanni

    mhhmmm yea im filthy rich

    why do u seem like ur in a bad mood
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    7:46pm Logan

    because I'm being bothered by a typical gay guy who's following the typical form of conversation directed at a guy he wants to mack on
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    7:48pm Giovanni

    than why do u talk to gay guys u dont know
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    7:48pm Logan

    you started the conversation

    I figure I can make myself boring enough to make you go away without having to explicitly having to tell you to, but that's clearly not working
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    7:49pm Giovanni

    ur an asshole
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    7:50pm Logan

    which is what I would have been if I didn't agree to let you in my pants

    have a good night
    ----------------------------
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:17 AM GMT
    Ain't that the truth...


    The last time I was an asshole... I forgot to call my mother. Now, I love mom, but, I'm a grown man (a dad to some I guess LOL)... so when she started giving me a hard time about it I sort of laid into her a bit. BIG MISTAKE. Everything is fine of course, but what a jerk I was. icon_neutral.gif
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:24 AM GMT
    flex89 said----------------------------
    7:34pm Logan

    it's a setting I fucked up somewhere in here, I'll find it

    what's your take on non-threaded operating systems?
    ----------------------------
    7:35pm Giovanni

    a laptop

    um
    ----------------------------


    I know I've got some asshole moments up my sleeve, but I had to comment solely because I found this line hilarious.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:25 AM GMT
    Thank GOD, I stopped using any form of chat feature a long time ago, but yeah...as soon as they start with the sexual innuendo, I'm done.

  • JayneCobb

    Posts: 709

    Jan 19, 2009 2:27 AM GMT
    I can't even count the number of times I've been an asshole today, let alone my whole life...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:28 AM GMT
    I was my minute and a half back!!!

    Thats not being an arse hole, dip shit yeah, but are hole no..

    Decking the 18 year old who has an attitude problem and thinks hes king shit is being an arse hole... for which I qualify... being rude is just being rude.

    but he was asking for it, speaking like that infront of my sister and nephews and nieces!
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:33 AM GMT
    I usually blow right past asshole to full blown screaming demon cunt at least once or twice a day. I don't feel too bad though because several of my coworkers are constantly in need of a severe beat down. Being a dick to them instead of choking the living shit out of them helps me keep my job.icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:33 AM GMT
    Logan's little multi-threaded line came from yours truly and it was so effective.....he was so proud of himself.

    The classic thing I get via chat is:
    1. You're really big. Do you workout?
    2. How hung are you?
    3. Would you fuck me?

    I blow them off.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:35 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidLogan's little multi-threaded line came from yours truly...


    You totally predicted his response, too, LOL!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:37 AM GMT
    Yes, I enjoy you inviting me into your conversations and listening to you giggle all the way through.

    There's nothing quite as priceless as a giggling 19 year old. LOL.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:38 AM GMT
    Oh, yeah.....multi-threaded, multi-tasking, multi-user operating systems like UNIX/LINUX ROCK!

    Can you imagine the telephone network on Windoze and M$? LMAO......

    UNIX just works.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:38 AM GMT
    Maybe this is one of MY asshole moments but can I see a picture with chuckystud and flex together?

    The question whether they're real or not has been bugging me for some time now.icon_razz.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:39 AM GMT
    If I get fed up enough I can utterly annihilate someone by just speaking. I'm glad I don't get fed up too much.

    When I moved out of my last roommate situation I left them a note on why the room was completely trashed. They had it coming and it was trashed. Nothing damaged but it I'm sure I'll be remembered and hated for the rest of their lives. icon_twisted.gif

    When my mom would call and start bitching I would tell her that if she stopped I would hang up. I hung up on her a lot until she learned to calm down. We get along much better now.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:40 AM GMT
    Oh, we're very real. Had you read my profile, you would have found that.

    http://www.bodybuilders.com/chuckg.htm

    Here just for citizensol:



    Chris, who runs realjock.com knows I'm real too. That's why my real name, my real picture, and real email, and real phone number are in in his possession.

    And, from on the radio,....for 11 years...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 2:45 AM GMT
    Oh, geez...

    Well, it's a tie between a couple moments with PSCalif and an ex-boyfriend a couple years ago. I'll choose the later to describe.

    I was 22 and he was 20. We had been dating for 8 months. Just before my birthday, around Christmas, he started to do Cocaine. We had been dealing with a lot. He wanted to move in (I didn't ask) but I wasn't willing to move in with someone that wasn't out. If he was financially strapped and we loved each other, then maybe, but he was well off. I wasn't willing to change this. I mean, I didn't work so hard to accept myself just to start lying to people - his family - all over again. Not a chance in hell!

    So anyways, he took this hard and started doing Cocaine. I caught him doing a line in my bathroom and sat him down to give him an ultimatum. I told him he couldn't come back into my home unless he dealt with his issues. A couple days later, after 3am calls and 20 texts a day begging me to take him back, I came home from work to find a Christmas tree, a present, and a note telling me he was checking into rehab.

    He called from the facility every once and a while and came home the day before Valentine's day. He was back to to normal and we were back to normal. Then, Valentine's day, he brought up the moving in thing again. I told him the same thing as before, and he got EXTREMELY upset, started balling, begging me, etc...I didn't give in. He left and a week passed. At that point I had been laid off, looking for work to no avail, and eventually went broke. Mother offered to pay my way back home, but no assistance.

    So, I started packing. The day before I starting hauling my crap back from Dallas to Palm Springs, he stopped in. He saw the boxes, asked me what was up, and started crying. He could barely speak. I told him what was going on and he offered to help pay to keep me there if he could move in. I told him the same thing as before. He kissed me, slapped me, hugged me for a while, and just left.

    We haven't talked since - almost two years. I feel like an asshole for the fact that I didn't talk to him about it. I mean, 8 months and I would've just left without a word if he hadn't come over that day. I just wish I had been more mature in my approach. It was that "IT" relationship, but he deserved that at least.

    Anyways, thanks for making me feel guilty, flex89 - ya jerk! icon_wink.gif
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Jan 19, 2009 3:06 AM GMT
    Way back in 1994, there was a guy in my first unit who was very close to his grandfather. I didn't know the guy, but he found out that his grandfather passed away. While the guy from my unit was away for the funeral, I overhead someone mentioning their relationship and that the grandfather basically raised the guy and that the grandfather was rich.

    Several days later, the guy returns to the unit and stops in to my office for something and without thinking or being sensitive, I asked him how much did he get! icon_eek.gificon_surprised.gificon_eek.gif

    That's one of my very few regrets in life.
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:09 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidOh, we're very real. Had you read my profile, you would have found that.

    http://www.bodybuilders.com/chuckg.htm

    Here just for citizensol:



    Chris, who runs realjock.com knows I'm real too. That's why my real name, my real picture, and real email, and real phone number are in in his possession.

    And, from on the radio,....for 11 years...


    icon_confused.gif

    LMAO

    You really didn't have to do all that. I'm sure you guys are real. I just think you guys are hilariously SURreal. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:12 AM GMT
    Allrighty, then...:-)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:17 AM GMT
    Wow. I don't even remember the last time I've been an asshole lol
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:18 AM GMT
    I was at a club (Diesel) with some friends. Some fat bitch who was a friend of a friend didn't like me and said to her friend (who I didn't know)

    "I heard that guy is like, a faggot." Her friend replies "Really?"

    I walked up to the fat girl near the bar and said "My, that's a lovely fragrance you're wearing. What is it? Eau De Cow?"
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:19 AM GMT
    Funny thread. Generally I'm a nice guy about this. If the conversation turns into something sexual or fetish related, then I just say I gotta go do something. Or I just say I'm not interested. Most of the time they get the hint, but a few can be persistent.
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:25 AM GMT
    De Cow....! That's funny.

    Logan and I will have to develop an online course: Being An Eloquent Asshole in 30 Days Or Less.
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:27 AM GMT
    My favorite, when someone is pouring the adoration on super thick: have you always been small?

    Or, "Are you considering a wellness program?"
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Jan 19, 2009 3:28 AM GMT
    A few years ago, on an ROTC assignment, a sister of one of my cadets wanted to make out with me. She was hot. I'm gay. We ducked into a small bar and commandered a booth where only one girl was sitting. We commenced bumping tongue-ies and the girl told us to get a room and upped and left.

    When we stopped for air, she asked if I liked it. Knowing where this was going and not wanting to go there, I told her non-chalantly, "yeah." Then I proceeded to tell her that I was doing it only because she wanted to do it. HAHAHA! She was none too pleased. But she was hot...
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    Jan 19, 2009 3:29 AM GMT
    CoolArmyDude probably looks good in his cammies....