How Much PDA is Too Much PDA?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 4:01 AM GMT
    PDA = Public Displays of Affection

    So a couple weeks ago, I was walking down the sidewalk when I see this hot guy get out of a big Ford F-250. He walked in front of me and didn't seem to notice me. I assumed he was straight but then he popped into a gay bar. So I ducked in too, ordered a drink and to get this guy to notice me but it was like I was invisible. I finally asked him if he'd like to play a game of pool with me and he said sure. He was very friendly and warm. But the whole game I was flirting with him but he wasn't flirting back. I finally was about to give up on him so as a last ditch effort I said: Ya know you're a really hard guy to flirt with." He seemed shocked and said "you're interested in me?" I said yes, I've been hitting on you for a solid hour. His entire demeanor changed once he realized I was into him. He got very touchy and started kissing the back of my neck and other signs of affection. I was okay with this because it was not over the top and we were in a gay bar.

    So a few days latter he invited me out to dinner and drinks. I was really REALLY excited. At dinner he couldn't keep his hands off me, which at first was thrilling. But then he wanted to feed me my food which I found odd and creepy. I can see where one or two bites might be romantic but it was like he was wanting to feed me my entire meal. I had to tell him I wanted to eat myself. He seemed disappointed.

    Then we go out for drinks and to try and catch a live band. We went to 6 different clubs trying to find a band we both liked. Each bar we went into, his hand never left my lower back. Every other minute he tried to kiss me deeply in these crowded straight bars. At one point we're standing in front of the stage and he takes my hand and starts licking it from my elbow all the way to the tips of my fingers. At this point he tries to put my entire hand into his mouth! I pulled my hand away and he said "you have a problem with intimacy don't you?" At this point I was feeling really creeped out and got really quite. I told him I wanted to go home and we drove home in silence. He tried to kiss me goodnight but I turned away and just got out of the truck. I was livid. We then had an angry chat exchange where he informed me once again that I had a lot of "issues" because I was "ashamed of being gay."

    Ironically, I actually think a little PDA is hot, but I feel like this guy was way over the top. What do you guys think?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 4:08 AM GMT
    Radd said... he said "you have a problem with intimacy don't you?"



    Lol. Losers always say that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 4:18 AM GMT
    It sounds like you tried way too hard to get his attention and he tried way too hard to make you two official
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 4:54 AM GMT
    WAY over the top. There is a difference between intimacy and wanting to feed someone. Think of it this way, if you do end up together it will come in handy at some point! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
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    Dec 14, 2014 5:05 AM GMT
    wtf icon_mad.gif
    you can only be fed by me
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Dec 14, 2014 5:09 AM GMT
    Why would you go out to dinner with someone you haven't even had sex with?icon_confused.gif
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    Dec 14, 2014 5:20 AM GMT
    HottJoe saidWhy would you go out to dinner with someone you haven't even had sex with?icon_confused.gif


    hahahahaha…. icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 3:16 PM GMT
    I guess when people are giving head to each other in public or having sex in front of you.
    Typical college spring break.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 6:47 PM GMT
    PDA is Hot!!!

    Being given a tongue bath at the foot of a stage during a performance is rude to the performing artist, annoying, slightly creepy and very likely unsanitary.

    It's like butter. A little on REALLY good bread is delicious.

    But a whole bowl of it with nothing else is kinda nauseating.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3534

    Dec 14, 2014 8:44 PM GMT
    i dont really care what other people think...so any amount.

    of course i would have skipped all the intimacy and just gone home immediately to show him what intimacy is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 9:30 PM GMT
    "At this point he tries to put my entire hand into his mouth!"
    You should have seen if he actually succeeded at that. If he did, you'd have something to look forward to.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2014 10:14 PM GMT
    Seems like your date has some boundaries issues. Loving, passionate or tender PDA is one thing, but what he showed was complete ignorance of your preferences.
    But him not picking up on you coming on to him and not realizing that he was making you uncomfortable with his bizarre PDA, points to some bigger issue of his.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 15, 2014 1:17 AM GMT
    Hard to say. PDA (Patent Ductus Arteriosis) can be managed through surgical or nonsurgical means.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 15, 2014 1:25 AM GMT
    HottJoe saidWhy would you go out to dinner with someone you haven't even had sex with?icon_confused.gif
    Maybe they pre-paid? (for the sex, that is)
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    Dec 15, 2014 2:14 AM GMT
    pazzy saidsorry but LMAO.. that shit is funny. you should have got your revenge on him in the bedroom by topping him in some aggressive, angry ass sex. smack his ass with the hand he tried to eat off your arm on some "you really fucked up trying to eat my hand at that bar, didn'tcha, bitch" when you hitting him from the back and let him have it too telling him.... "YA YA, bitch" while he groans.


    I thought the op was a strict bottom
  • Jav1993

    Posts: 45

    Dec 15, 2014 5:57 AM GMT
    #JesusFixIt

    I think i'd have punched him in the face. Plus, wherever he licked u is now sticky and left with a bad smell...yeah, i couldn't do it...then again, depends on how hot he was hahahah
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    Dec 15, 2014 6:08 AM GMT
    Jav1993 said#JesusFixIt

    I think i'd have punched him in the face. Plus, wherever he licked u is now sticky and left with a bad smell...yeah, i couldn't do it...then again, depends on how hot he was hahahah



    Exactly. I just stood there holding my wet hand in front of my face with a look of disbelief on my face. Honestly I really did just feel like smacking him. It was a strange feeling to go from being insanely attracted to someone to being completely turned off.....all within a little over an hour. icon_neutral.gif And no I'm not interested in him anymore, even though he did finally call and apologize for everything. His explanation is he's just a crude guy from working on oil rigs with other "crude" guys. (No pun intended.) I like manly guys but I think he's a little too savage for my tastes. He's hot but I think I'm going to have to let this one go.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 15, 2014 6:13 AM GMT
    IDK....PDA in a darkened club with loud music and mo kids....limited to the decency of the crowd
    ....maybe not an open BJ or fucking....but discrete public fun....SURE!icon_cool.gif
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    Dec 15, 2014 6:22 AM GMT
    Radd said
    Jav1993 said#JesusFixIt

    I think i'd have punched him in the face. Plus, wherever he licked u is now sticky and left with a bad smell...yeah, i couldn't do it...then again, depends on how hot he was hahahah



    Exactly. I just stood there holding my wet hand in front of my face with a look of disbelief on my face. Honestly I really did just feel like smacking him. It was a strange feeling to go from being insanely attracted to someone to being completely turned off.....all within a little over an hour. icon_neutral.gif And no I'm not interested in him anymore, even though he did finally call and apologize for everything. His explanation is he's just a crude guy from working on oil rigs with other "crude" guys. (No pun intended.) I like manly guys but I think he's a little too savage for my tastes. He's hot but I think I'm going to have to let this one go.


    Somehow I have a hard time believing the Dudes on the rig stand around licking each other's appendages and extremities....

    icon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gif
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    Dec 15, 2014 6:48 AM GMT
    Cash said
    Radd said
    Jav1993 said#JesusFixIt

    I think i'd have punched him in the face. Plus, wherever he licked u is now sticky and left with a bad smell...yeah, i couldn't do it...then again, depends on how hot he was hahahah



    Exactly. I just stood there holding my wet hand in front of my face with a look of disbelief on my face. Honestly I really did just feel like smacking him. It was a strange feeling to go from being insanely attracted to someone to being completely turned off.....all within a little over an hour. icon_neutral.gif And no I'm not interested in him anymore, even though he did finally call and apologize for everything. His explanation is he's just a crude guy from working on oil rigs with other "crude" guys. (No pun intended.) I like manly guys but I think he's a little too savage for my tastes. He's hot but I think I'm going to have to let this one go.


    Somehow I have a hard time believing the Dudes on the rig stand around licking each other's appendages and extremities....

    icon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gif



    Hahaha. Well, I don't think that's what he meant. He was just saying he's crude because he's around a lot of crude dudes. And apparently a lot of crude.
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    Dec 15, 2014 6:57 AM GMT
    LionEyes saidYou got yourself into a situation, first you came across desperate wanting his attention and then you back off when he responded in likely manner. Is your post to make people here validate your views or feel sorry for you? Because I don't. You contributed to that situation, you set the tone. I personally don't mind PDA, if the guy I'm dating is too horny and things escalate I would either go back home and have sex or politely ask him to take it down to a 2. I never had a man coming to me that strong, in part because I set the tone. The problem is with guys pushing a chemistry that is non-existent simply because the guy is attractive and that's mistake.



    I don't need anything from you dude. It's a fucking forum where people discuss things. No need to be a cunt. And it's bullshit that I did the same thing he did. And no, I did not set the tone for a grotesque public display. Just because I was trying to get his attention doesn't mean I wanted to be his human popsicle in public. I did nothing inappropriate. He did. Period.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 15, 2014 7:03 AM GMT
    No, it's just that your criticism isn't logical. I did nothing gross to "set this tone" as you put it so your comment just comes across as bitchy and uninformed and it's why so many guys don't post anymore.
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    Dec 15, 2014 10:42 AM GMT
    Radd said
    LionEyes saidYou got yourself into a situation, first you came across desperate wanting his attention and then you back off when he responded in likely manner. Is your post to make people here validate your views or feel sorry for you? Because I don't. You contributed to that situation, you set the tone. I personally don't mind PDA, if the guy I'm dating is too horny and things escalate I would either go back home and have sex or politely ask him to take it down to a 2. I never had a man coming to me that strong, in part because I set the tone. The problem is with guys pushing a chemistry that is non-existent simply because the guy is attractive and that's mistake.



    I don't need anything from you dude. It's a fucking forum where people discuss things. No need to be a cunt. And it's bullshit that I did the same thing he did. And no, I did not set the tone for a grotesque public display. Just because I was trying to get his attention doesn't mean I wanted to be his human popsicle in public. I did nothing inappropriate. He did. Period.


    I dont agree with lioneyes delivery but from an outside perspective you both appeared to be desperate. There's nothing wrong with either of you though. People just respond differently when they're excited, nervous, etc. I personally always give at least one free pass for a disaster date because I know that people have their different customs and it's either a hit or miss. People are pretty fickle though which is unfortunate and at the worst sabotaging.

    Another date with this guy could be better if boundaries are set.
  • Buddha

    Posts: 1767

    Dec 15, 2014 10:53 AM GMT
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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 15, 2014 2:02 PM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle said
    LionEyes said Is your post to make people here validate your views or feel sorry for you?


    Good call on your part, LionEyes.

    I think what we're supposed to glean from the ongoing fictional Scruffie tales is that all these hot gus are chasing Scruffie in some way. But the formula for his story lines gets a bit stale after awhile. It pretty much goes like this:

    1) Some really hot guy wants Scruffie, which Scruffie articulates with poignant detail.

    2) Through the process of courting, Scruffie is somehow heavily disappointed in the other person.

    3) Scruffie then elaborates with great detail how he rejects the "really hot guy." This makes him feel as though he has all the power. Nothing to be surprised about when you think about it.

    4) In the end, nothing becomes of anything in the never-ending dating downfalls of the Scruffie tales. But for those obsessed with being in control, it must feel really good to not only kick some hot guy to the curb but to also divulge all the details on a public forum.



    It's so obvious your attacks against me have zero to do with my credibility. Once again, it's 1:44 in the morning and your "boyfriend" is nowhere in sight. You really do spend much more time chasing me around these forums that you do with this incredibly hot "boyfriend" of yours. If he does exist, no doubt he spends as little time with you as possible until he can figure out a way to escape your toxic ass. It's obvious from your stalking and attacks in this forum you must be a real piece of work in real life. No wonder no one can stand to spend time with you. Nothing better to do than attack people like me who oppose you for promoting your bareback agenda. Most people here are against HIV- guys barebacking with HIV+ guys and you're livid with anyone who opposes that agenda. Everyone here sees it. But keep up the attacks....it only proves who you really are.