Why gay people are so mean?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 3:59 AM GMT
    Ok, I met this guy on Grindr, he was from my home country so we were getting along pretty well, one week later we set up a meet up in a bar, when I showed up he was with two other friends who say hello to me and immediately they said that they were leaving, so I was just standing there like...well you guess it.

    Then which is even horrible, I met another guy from my hometown too last week and he said he has been in USA just for 2 weeks so I told him if he wanted to go out because it was boring not to know the city and being stuck at home with no car, so he agreed and when we meet at this bar HE WAS WITH THE SAME PEOPLE THAT LET ME ALONE BEFORE! how embarrassing is that, basically nobody talked to me for 20 min that seemed like hours to me, I was thinking all the time that I was not going to keep up with that shit so I left, I told them I was meeting a friend in another bar, which of course was not true....and to even get the things worse it was raining really hard outside and I could not remember where I parked my car, I walked for almost one hour and a half in the pouring rain.

    Gay people can be really mean...
  • Tig3r

    Posts: 139

    Jan 06, 2015 4:15 AM GMT
    Grindr problems. I never take anything personal but it is pretty awful that they agreed to meet up with you and still did not associate with you, if they did not want to have a drink with you, the easiest thing would have been to tell you.
  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Jan 06, 2015 4:16 AM GMT
    I'm sorry you had such a lousy experience.

    Not all gay guys are mean and what you experienced isn't really just a gay thing, just a people thing. In any case, I wish you luck in meeting new guys, don't give up. icon_smile.gif
  • Eli_jah

    Posts: 1391

    Jan 06, 2015 4:53 AM GMT
    Gay men for the most part are very petty and fickle, I've noticed. I don't know why this is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 5:01 AM GMT
    yeah, straight guys are amazing and gay guys are the worst of all humanity.

    To the OP
    -You really 29?
    -you really been on RJ sense 2008?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 5:04 AM GMT
    Not everybody will be into you. Most polite guys will stay for one drink, then make excuses. Some guys are more blunt and immediate. Were you evasive or deceptive about your appearance before meeting them? If so, you should expect the minimum.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 6:36 AM GMT
    Gay people aren't mean. Some people just don't have a good judgement and pick the wrong people to hang out with.

    Hint, hint.
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    Jan 06, 2015 6:50 AM GMT
    mindgarden saidNot everybody will be into you. Most polite guys will stay for one drink, then make excuses. Some guys are more blunt and immediate. Were you evasive or deceptive about your appearance before meeting them? If so, you should expect the minimum.


    I was not, I sent him pictures of me and my profile shows my weight and height
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    Jan 06, 2015 6:51 AM GMT
    dustin_K_tx saidyeah, straight guys are amazing and gay guys are the worst of all humanity.

    To the OP
    -You really 29?
    -you really been on RJ sense 2008?


    Yes I am 29 and I have been a long time member of RJ, I just realized how time flies, its been a long time since I joined
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    Jan 06, 2015 6:52 AM GMT
    xrichx saidGay people aren't mean. Some people just don't have a good judgement and pick the wrong people to hang out with.

    Hint, hint.


    I am so stupid cause I promised not to look for friends on those apps and I did, well since this guy was from Colombia as me, I thought we were going to have a good chat.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 7:07 AM GMT
    I was not trying to be rude. I've been on both sides of this in the meat market. Shake it off and go on to the next. Eventually you'll learn how to play to your strengths. If you figure out how to nail Perfect Tommy, please post.
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    Jan 06, 2015 7:10 AM GMT
    charlmed said
    xrichx saidGay people aren't mean. Some people just don't have a good judgement and pick the wrong people to hang out with.

    Hint, hint.


    I am so stupid cause I promised not to look for friends on those apps and I did, well since this guy was from Colombia as me, I thought we were going to have a good chat.

    Sometimes, people don't want to associate with other people from the same country, while living in a foreign land. It sounds like the guys you met want to meet different people. Not really your fault. Not everyone is like that. Just move on and forget about about them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 9:10 AM GMT
    Because they watch the movie **Mean girls way too much? Lol, honestly there will be guys in this world who just hate you or be mean for no reason. I don't expect all people to like me. Just be yourself, who cares, their loss.
  • Matras

    Posts: 69

    Jan 06, 2015 1:31 PM GMT
    why gay guys looking for support on gay forums?
  • davfit

    Posts: 309

    Jan 06, 2015 3:10 PM GMT
    "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 3:46 PM GMT
    I'm a gay man and I'm not mean, especially when it comes to Latinos. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 4:30 PM GMT
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jan 06, 2015 4:35 PM GMT
    timmm55 said
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!

    Nothing new about haters. He's just jealous and wants to say people who enjoy bars are beneath him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 4:45 PM GMT
    timmm55 said
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!

    Interesting. I have avoided bars for the last decade. But when a friend came to town we did some bar hopping and I was pleasantly surprised to find that bar culture I saw was more (as you say) social and easy going than what I remember from the dark days. If this is a tren I might go more often.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14354

    Jan 06, 2015 5:04 PM GMT
    HottJoe said
    timmm55 said
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!

    Nothing new about haters. He's just jealous and wants to say people who enjoy bars are beneath him.
    Bars are the absolute worst place to meet new people. Especially today everyone is addicted to their stupid idiotic iphones and smartphones that they don't even talk to anyone next to them. The best place to meet someone new is a Starbucks or a local coffee joint. It is a much more relaxed atmosphere and you can have a nice conversation and get to know one another. Bars are too damned noisy and you have to scream at the top of your lungs because of the ridiculously loud music.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jan 06, 2015 5:08 PM GMT
    roadbikeRob said
    HottJoe said
    timmm55 said
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!

    Nothing new about haters. He's just jealous and wants to say people who enjoy bars are beneath him.
    Bars are the absolute worst place to meet new people. Especially today everyone is addicted to their stupid idiotic iphones and smartphones that they don't even talk to anyone next to them. The best place to meet someone new is a Starbucks or a local coffee joint. It is a much more relaxed atmosphere and you can have a nice conversation and get to know one another. Bars are too damned noisy and you have to scream at the top of your lungs because of the ridiculously loud music.

    You can't dance with your shirt off in a Starbucks though.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 5:50 PM GMT
    Most gay men are like that. They all want Brad Pitt while looking like Danny DeVito.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 5:59 PM GMT
    HottJoe said
    roadbikeRob said
    HottJoe said
    timmm55 said
    davfit said "Bar" was first mistake never met people there coffee is always a better choice ..only two faced nasty gay men go to Bars on a regular basis. stay away


    Geez I work in a bar. Nowadays (due to Grindr et al) they are mostly social. I don't know what your experience was, but I guess it wasn't good!

    Nothing new about haters. He's just jealous and wants to say people who enjoy bars are beneath him.
    Bars are the absolute worst place to meet new people. Especially today everyone is addicted to their stupid idiotic iphones and smartphones that they don't even talk to anyone next to them. The best place to meet someone new is a Starbucks or a local coffee joint. It is a much more relaxed atmosphere and you can have a nice conversation and get to know one another. Bars are too damned noisy and you have to scream at the top of your lungs because of the ridiculously loud music.

    You can't dance with your shirt off in a Starbucks though.


    Glad you finally learned that.

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif
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    Jan 06, 2015 6:08 PM GMT
    LAXWill10 saidBecause they watch the movie **Mean girls way too much? Lol, honestly there will be guys in this world who just hate you or be mean for no reason. I don't expect all people to like me. Just be yourself, who cares, their loss.


    In fact I know a group of gay people that gathers twice a year to watch mean girls and throw a party about it, I am like...really?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2015 7:38 PM GMT
    dustin_K_tx saidyeah, straight guys are amazing and gay guys are the worst of all humanity.


    Exactly. Perhaps he has received nothing but kindness from every straight person he has ever encountered.