I like my best friend, but I don't know how to ask him out

  • kinggyboy

    Posts: 3

    Jan 13, 2015 1:17 AM GMT
    So, when I joined the military I met this guy. We have been living in the same building for about 6 months and I thought he was straight so I never tried anything than some flirting, even though I thought he was really cute.
    We both get along really well, have the same sort of personality, like the same things and I kind of started to really like him. Still never did anything because I thought he was straight.
    We came back from our Christmas holidays this week and I found out that he was making out with the guy while he was away (possibly even had sex with him). Now im convinced hes not gay and I really want to try and start something.

    We hang out a lot out side of work, like going for coffee and movies and and that but it never really feels like a date or anything.
    I guess my question is, how can I make a move. I’m the only person he has told about his experience with another guy and I don’t want to ruin a great friendship but the possibility of a relationship is to tantalising
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 13, 2015 5:41 PM GMT
    You should have opened the door while he was telling you about his experimentation with a bloke .
    It would have been easy for you to say , BTW mate , i fancy sex with blokes icon_smile.gif
    Continue your mateship with him until another opportunity opens , then go for it ..
    Best of luck !
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 901

    Jan 15, 2015 9:24 AM GMT
    A surprising number of men enjoy having sex with other men. Quite a few of them do not wish to be perceived as gay. Some do not like the cultural traits of the perceived gay culture. The others do not like the perceived stigma. Some would like to have families and children but would like to have fun while they can. The list rolls on and on. Again, every guy is a story for himself...

    You can always ask him about his experience with this other guy, and open an interesting topic. See where this takes you to...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 15, 2015 4:23 PM GMT
    every one's sex is soooo different.
    Could fail. Maybe after you get to know your friend as a lover YOU will not want to even be in the same room with him. It could go that way too but small chance it will go as planned.

    always a bad idea to date coworkers, room mates, neighbors.
    on the other hand
    you will always wonder what if...

  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4913

    Jan 15, 2015 4:28 PM GMT
    I say take the direct approach. Don't be passive. Say something like "I know we've been hanging out a lot together. But how would you feel about an actual date?" Then see what he says. Don't turn into one of those guys that turns into a sniveling child because the guy he wants won't ask him out. So he settles to be a friend hearing about the other guy actually having a life. Go for it!
  • kinggyboy

    Posts: 3

    Jan 15, 2015 8:27 PM GMT
    Thanks for all the advice guys I'm going to try it all x