Childhood stupidity

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    Jan 20, 2009 8:24 PM GMT
    So what was something you did as a kid that was totally stupid?

    Me? well, I ran full pelt into a glass window, but thats not the funny part apparently, I remember the window, but as it is told, I bounced off the glass, flat out on my back, I get up and stand there like a stunned mullet looking at the glass before turning around and walking away and it wasn't until I was back with my mum that I burst into tears while everyone cracked up around me, I was 3 or 4

    Another one, was catching tadpoles with a mate, it had been pissing down for a few days and it was incredibly muddy, so, my mate and I where catching our tadpoles and I was standing ever so still and without realising it, I had actually sunk into the mud, so deep had I sunk that I couldn't get back out again, my dad had to be called to pull me out, I was 5

    these are the stories that are brought up again and again about me..

    I also had the nick name of egg head from my brother and he used to say you could write the ten commandments on my two front teeth.. thank gawd I grew into them hahaha icon_biggrin.gif
  • byronicheros

    Posts: 211

    Jan 20, 2009 8:33 PM GMT
    how about you just say "mate" again...
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    Jan 20, 2009 8:41 PM GMT
    What stupid things did I not do as a child?? Some highlights:

    I once raced up the patio of my house on rollerskates, through the front door, and immediately through the open door to the basements stairs...ending up on my ass at the bottom of the stairs.

    Another time, I was running across my friend's deck, and must have not been quite paying enough attention. There was a trap door that opened up into the four-foot space under the deck, and it was wide open. I ran right into the big gaping hole and ended up on my ass with the wind knocked out of me.

    And yet another time, I was on the swingset on a playground at my preschool. When it was time to go inside, I got up some momentum, jumped at the highest peak of my swing, and made a perfect running landing...then got about three steps before busting my face right open on the jungle gym. Once again, I ended up right on my ass.

    That all happened when I was about five years old. That must be where some of those brain cells went to...
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Jan 20, 2009 8:49 PM GMT
    zdrew saidWhat stupid things did I not do as a child?? Some highlights:

    I once raced up the patio of my house on rollerskates, through the front door, and immediately through the open door to the basements stairs...ending up on my ass at the bottom of the stairs.

    Another time, I was running across my friend's deck, and must have not been quite paying enough attention. There was a trap door that opened up into the four-foot space under the deck, and it was wide open. I ran right into the big gaping hole and ended up on my ass with the wind knocked out of me.

    And yet another time, I was on the swingset on a playground at my preschool. When it was time to go inside, I got up some momentum, jumped at the highest peak of my swing, and made a perfect running landing...then got about three steps before busting my face right open on the jungle gym. Once again, I ended up right on my ass.

    That all happened when I was about five years old. That must be where some of those brain cells went to...
    and still your cute ass survived! icon_cool.gif
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    Jan 20, 2009 8:50 PM GMT
    HAHAHA I'm just seeing a little zDrew on his arse at the bottom of the stairs in a crumpled heap icon_biggrin.gif

    gawd knows how many times I attempted to go down stairs on roller blades.. you just can't do it...
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jan 20, 2009 8:50 PM GMT
    Raced downhill on the street in front of my old house in a metal shopping cart. It hit the curb, I was thrown from the cart and it flipped over and landed on top of me. I was Jackass before it was cool.
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    Jan 20, 2009 8:51 PM GMT
    Not without its share of scars and bumps, rnch! And tanker, it wasn't on purpose! The basement door was directly across the entryway from the kitchen door, and was usually closed.

    I almost forgot. I didn't outgrow the stupid. I regularly climbed trees and then couldn't figure out how to get back down. Once I had to sit perched in one until my dad got home from work and brought out a ladder. I tended to forget I was afraid of heights when climbing, then suddenly remember when I was fifteen or twenty feet up.



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    Jan 20, 2009 9:05 PM GMT
    I jumped off the balcony around our house and landed in such a way i impaled my knee with my two front teeth. kinda sore and a bit stupid.

    So what did i do - a couple of months later - i did the exact same thing and my teeth landed in the exact same spot - leaving me with a lovely scar in my knee with the shape of my two front teeth - even the little space between both teeth! icon_redface.gif
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:06 PM GMT
    Haha. Let's see...

    Kindergarten, in a Christian school run by nuns. We found a rather large wasp colony on the branches of a star apple tree. It was playtime, and being rather bored of the playground, us boys took to throwing stones at the hive. Needless to say, we had bloated cheeks to show for it the whole week.

    On an island ferry. I was resting on the top bed of a double decker during a daytime crossing (something like a 12 hour trip so we didn't require cabins). My Dad was off with my brother and Mom somewhere and I was left to guard the luggage. Having nothing to do I stretched my legs up to reach the ceiling while lying down (It was quite near). I lost my balance and fell, dislocating an elbow. OUCH! A Muslim woman nearby saw me fall and rushed to help. She had my arm back in its socket and in a sling by the time Dad returned. Thankfully it was a return trip from Cebu island, so I didn't have to endure what would have been a miserable vacation. LOL

    EDIT: In retrospect, the 'sling', was probably her shawl. It had intricate paisley patterns on it favored for use as a head covering by Muslim women in Southeast Asia.

    Playing with melting plastic on anthills. Basically you get a stick, wrap an end with a plastic bag or something, and set it on fire. You then drip the burning plastic down on ant colonies. Cruel I know, but heck, we were kids. icon_razz.gif And it was quite fascinating, like meteors raining down on the hapless insects. Problems are when the aim misses or it splatters. I still have scars on a hand and a knee to show for it.

    The best was probably the bed-jumping experience. My younger brother and I were jumping up and down on the mattress of my bed in our room. Contorting into imitations of martial artists midair. I slipped, and hit my head against the wooden edge of the bed and blacked out. I still have the Harry Potter scar on my forehead. icon_razz.gif

    I was very much an outdoors kid when I was younger. I have dozens more of stories like that from leeches (which is not quite stupidity, more like bad luck) to fistfighting over inane stuff (who gets the most share of fruits from raids of orchards here for example) to getting bitten by velvet ant because I thought they were simply hairy ants to being chased around by angry hens because I tried to return lost chicks icon_lol.gif.
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:06 PM GMT


    Bill had a slingshot - he was about 8 years old. He was outside shooting at pine-cones in trees when a group of younger kids walked by and a couple of them asked from how far away could he still hit something. So, he aimed at a robin perched waaaaayy up up up in the top of a cedar. He decapitated the bird and it landed on the street beside these little kids, who began screaming (the girls) and crying (one of the boys).
    But not as bad as poor Bill, who loved animals and really didn't think he could hit anything. He bawled his eyes out and threw away the sling-shot.

    My neighbours were building a new house. We took to playing in the framework on weekends - like monkeybars or a jungle gym. Mom yelled at us,
    "You be careful in there!! You'll step on a nail the wrong way and end up at the hospital!!" In a minute I'd found a nail sticking right up out of a board and carefully stepped on it the right way, alright. I was four.

    This last is my sister's. She loved animals, too, and loved shows like wind in the willows and other ones where they would add voices to live action fottage of animals. "My lil people." she'd say. We had a hamster and a cat. One day she came running upstairs happy and excited. Me being suspicious at the furtive way she closed the basement door, asked what was going on down there.
    "Oh," she said, happy at her idea, "Hammie the hamster is playing with the cat." ....omg.... she was 6.
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:08 PM GMT
    I ate cockroaches. Well, I was fond of chewing them, just to hear the cracking sound of their "wings" between my teeth. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:11 PM GMT
    The worst was when as kids of the mid-nighties we were still allowed to play out in the real world. There was a housing development near where I lived and some other kids dared me to jump into a house foundation I ended up up to my chest in concrete....

    Man that was fun...we turned one half built house into a skate park icon_lol.gif

    That would never happen to 10 year olds these days
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:18 PM GMT
    Oh and another one. My cousin's family had this grapefruit (suha in our language) tree in their backyard and it was covered with colonies of weaving ants. They had sewn clumps of leaves together, as large as softballs, and they were hanging from the branches rather invitingly. So unable to resist the temptation, my cousin picked up a stick and batted one hard. LOL. The nest exploded and showered us with ants. They're about a third of an inch large, and their bite really sting, though they don't itch. Haha. Talk about a race to the nearest garden hose.
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:21 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    This last is my sister's. She loved animals, too, and loved shows like wind in the willows and other ones where they would add voices to live action fottage of animals. "My lil people." she'd say. We had a hamster and a cat. One day she came running upstairs happy and excited. Me being suspicious at the furtive way she closed the basement door, asked what was going on down there.
    "Oh," she said, happy at her idea, "Hammie the hamster is playing with the cat." ....omg.... she was 6.


    ROFLMAO!
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:34 PM GMT
    MANY MANY MANY things I did!!!

    1. Walked across a water pipe that stretched across a canyon, probably a good 50-75ft up and fell and ATE SHIT!!!! Why? Because I didn't want to walk ALL the way around the neighborhood to get to that side.

    2. Used to ride our Big Wheels over wet grass and then it dropped down a steep grass hill and then we'd pull on the hand brake and spin or eat shit down the entire hill!

    3. Play tackle football in the street, not the grass, but the street!

    4. Play tackle football at night, NO lights.

    5. Play Dodge Ball with a football

    All of the above were done repeatedly on a regular basis.....

    DAMN!!!!
  • Latenight30

    Posts: 1525

    Jan 20, 2009 9:34 PM GMT
    Oh to be stupid and indistructable.
    I loved to play Spider Man or Hulk and thought I could swing from a chandelier. well that was a hole in the ceiling.
    Now you can interprate this however you need..
    I appearntly would eat,,,or put anything in my mouth. Metal Brads from my brothers art project, orange berries or any plant within arms reach and a toy puppy dog tail
    Not sure how it got to this point but I love hearing the story I was 3 or 4 and the pediatrician asked.. "okay jonathan what have you put in your mouth this time"
    The Doctors have since stoped asking that question.. the list gets too long
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:36 PM GMT
    When I was really little (probably about 3 or 4), we lived next to a park. One time we were having a party and there was a big line for the bathroom and my dad had just shown me that I could pee in the yard instead of going inside when I was playing, or swimming in the pool.

    So I went in the front yard and took a nice, little kid sized dump right next to the fence.

    My cousin told my dad I was using the restroom outside and he was just like, "Uhm, alright", until I came inside and asked him to wipe my ass for me.
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:39 PM GMT


    All of you guys are cracking me up! I haven't laughed this hard in awhile.

    -Doug


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    Jan 20, 2009 9:48 PM GMT
    I was 8, and my mother's 1957 Chrysler Imperial was brand new, a huge thing with these outrageously big fins. She had just driven home from somewhere, and complained that she'd been forced to ride through some fresh tar on the road, and it had splashed all along the sides of her car. She wasn't sure how she would get it off, and appeared very upset to me.

    Little Tom to his Mom's rescue! Without her knowledge, I grabbed a bucket and some Brillo pads, and took them out to the drive leading to the garage behind the house, where she'd parked her car. I dragged a garden hose over and filled the bucket with water.

    I started scrubbing the lower side of the car, where the tar was the worst. The Brillo pad made some nice suds, and I rubbed away. Then I took the hose to rinse the soap off, and saw -- bare metal! I had stripped the paint right down to the metal!

    I dropped the hose and started to run for the house in terror, just as my mother came outside and saw what I was doing. Even from inside the house I could hear her shrieks, as I looked for someplace to hide. I was found and beaten rather soundly.

    She had the entire car repainted, in a new 2-tone color scheme she choose over the original. And I was warned, on peril of my life, to never do anything regarding the family cars ever again without prior permission.

    Pics of a car like my Mom's 2-door that I ruined:

    bb5f_1.JPG

    bf63_1.JPG
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    Jan 20, 2009 9:51 PM GMT
    I bit the family dog.

    I was 4 yrs old. My mother looked out the kitchen window just in time to see me take a bite. A few weeks later, she noticed a circular mark on my chin and assumed I had ringworm from biting the dog. She cancelled our vacation so I could get in to the family Doctor.

    Turned out that it was not ringworm but I had vaccinated myself (MMR). Somehow, I managed to transfer a vaccination from my older sister onto my chin.

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    Jan 20, 2009 10:01 PM GMT

    I remember back when I was 9, a neighborhood convenient store owner left the counter for a few minutes 'til I noticed the store itself was empty. I grabbed a pocketful of different candies and tucked them into my shorts that had NO pockets whatsoever. By the time I was about to head out the door, the store owner came in and ALL of the candies came rushing down out of my shorts at the very same moment. My heart started palpitating and I was pretty much frozen from that point. He grabbed me and called my Grandmother. She was livid after finding out what I had done and gotten a pretty bad spanking.

    Another one, I was having a big family breakfast at my older cousin's house when I put soy sauce on his coffee when he wasn't looking LOL. Then he came back at me later by putting half a bottle of vinegar on my glass of Sprite. icon_sad.gif

    Then at some point, I got mad at my Grandmother that I replaced her sugar container with salt. Lots of salt.
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    Jan 20, 2009 10:10 PM GMT
    My childhood was one long experience in "learning" the hard way. Not that I did anything really, really stupid or anything, but here are a few highlights.

    - pestered a hornet's nest at our cottage and got stung on the eyelid for my efforts;

    - was criticized by my grade 1 teacher for being a "chatterbox" in class. I rarely said anything in class for the next 18 school years;

    - actually believed my mom when she said that chewing one's finger nails was poisonous (what can I say I was a gullible kid);

    - in public school a bunch of us raced to the "monkey bars" and I had too much momentum, lost control and smashed my left eye into the metal. My glasses shattered but fortunately missed my eye. The blood and stitches were pretty impressive though.

    - I used to be goalie in road hockey for years without protection. I don't know how many partially frozen tennis balls I stopped with my "Crown Jewels" but it was a fair number. Never did put on a protective cup though.

    - I couldn't learn how to tie my shoelaces so in frustration my mom bribed my brother with $5 to teach me. My brother received an early lesson in fatherhood. Even today I am stupid with manual dexterity stuff.

    I think that takes me up to age 12 when I hit puberty and took stupidty to an art form. icon_redface.gif



  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Jan 20, 2009 10:21 PM GMT
    About 5 or 6 years old, I was playing with a frogging pitch fork, sticking it into the dirt, just to make holes. I was barefooted and decided to look up at the clouds and ...yep! I poked my foot. I had to get a tetanus shot.

    I knew how to ride my bicycle with no hands on the handlebars. Then I wanted to see if I could do it with no hands and feet tucked up. I shouldn't have tried it, let alone going downhill on asphalt.

    I teased a baby alligator while crabbing, slapping the tethered bait onto its head as it chomped at it...until the mother alligator came around the bend.




    I hypnotized a fellow boy scout camp counselor to a time when he first played with the ouija board. Laying on a cot during hypnosis, he moved his legs as if he were walking or running and described two demons holding his wrists and taking him down some long stairs. Freaked out, I awoke him, and with a sweaty forehead, he asked me why his wrists hurt. icon_eek.gif
  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    Jan 20, 2009 10:32 PM GMT
    I told my best friend in elementary school that I once had a sister but she was bit by a poisonous frog and died.

    I once peed on an electric fence in my neighbors back yard.

    When I was super young, the geese that hung out at my neighbors barn were sqwaking at me like they wanted some, so I tried to fight one with a plastic childrens golf club... it beat the shit out of me with its wings.

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    Jan 20, 2009 10:32 PM GMT
    I was playing in my sand box out back. Our dog had puppies and they were always running around. So I had an idea. I ran inside the house and got my parents and my sister to come out and see what I did. They saw several puppies buried with their heads sticking out of the ground!

    My dad raised birds and I took a couple of dead ones for show and tell at school.

    One time I was playing with play-do and a snake came up to me. I think it was a garden snake. I took my play-do knife, cut it in half, and went back to the play-do. When my mom saw it she freaked.

    When my sister annoyed me (which was most of the time) I would put a tape recorder under her bed if she had friends over. Then I'd walk through the house replaying what was recorded. She'd get so pissed.

    When my sister would have friends over I'd go outside her window and look in. ALWAYS scared them half to death!

    My cousin had a wind up mouse. We were visiting our Grandmother and while she was in the kitchen we let the mouse loose. She just took a broom and started swatting it like it was nothing.

    I was notorious for running away. It was so bad that my parents would help me pack!