Hidden face profiles on RJ in presumed liberal countries

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 3:36 AM GMT
    Just to let you know, I tried finding similar threads.

    I was going through a rush of profiles here on RJ and I noticed something, even in the US and presumed gay friendly countries like Brazil, guys on here still keep their faces hidden.

    Is there a particular reason why you do this?
    Death threat?
    Family/friends discovering you (not out)?
    Stalkers?

    Which even brings me to a greater question. For those living in what would be called gay friendly places around the world, is there still a major disadvantage to being out on the web on a site like this? USA, Canada, GB, Australia, Brazil, South Africa.

    I am in Jamaica, where being gay is rough and in a sense, I am risking it having my picture on a site like this. Not to mention my profile which details my sexuality.

    If someone, family or someone I knew were to discover it I would certainly be in a lot of deep shit, especially if it was the opposite gender. The chances of my mother or siblings coming on this site though are next never. I have a better chance of being struck by lightening.

    I am sure there are some Jamaica guys on the site, but they themselves would have some explaining to do.

    Just curious.
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 874

    Feb 07, 2015 5:12 AM GMT
    The problem with anything that you do on the web is that it is there for a very, very long time. There is no way back...

    I have always lived in what may be considered gay-friendly environment (within reason). I would not choose to live anywhere else. You have only got one life to live, after all.

    Yet, I cannot see any benefit of posting a mugshot of mine here or elsewhere. I am not using boards as a hookup platform. Hence, how am I being helped by posting my facepic here?

    The idea here is that I am likely to do something/anything if I see a direct benefit coming out of it. If no... you are catching the drifticon_biggrin.gif

    SC
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 5:18 AM GMT
    Understood. I was just wondering since my perception of hiding your identity has more to do it fear of something. I can accept at the same time too if you choose not to if you just don't feel like doing it. Althought that must require a lot of cropping. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 6:08 AM GMT
    1. One can set "preferences," so that your profile and pics are viewable only by other RJ members. By setting preferences, no one from Jamaica who wasn't an RJ member could any of see your pics unless they were also an RJ member.. Of course, if someone from Jamaica wanted to target gays, they could sign up on RJ as a member.

    2. Some guys on here have "stolen" pics of members and used them for various purposes - thus reluctance by some to have face pics available without asking.

    3. Some guys just don't want to be identifiable to everyone on RJ who might recognize them from their pics. There have been some unsavory stalkers on RJ.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 11:40 AM GMT
    They might be celebrities like T*m Cr**s*, W*ll Sm*th or J*hn Tr*v*lt*

    (Names obscured to protect their identities)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 3:13 PM GMT
    HikerSkier said1. One can set "preferences," so that your profile and pics are viewable only by other RJ members. By setting preferences, no one from Jamaica who wasn't an RJ member could any of see your pics unless they were also an RJ member.. Of course, if someone from Jamaica wanted to target gays, they could sign up on RJ as a member.

    Thanks, never knew that, just made that adjustment!

    2. Some guys on here have "stolen" pics of members and used them for various purposes - thus reluctance by some to have face pics available without asking.

    3. Some guys just don't want to be identifiable to everyone on RJ who might recognize them from their pics. There have been some unsavory stalkers on RJ.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 4:38 PM GMT
    Ohno saidThey might be celebrities like T*m Cr**s*, W*ll Sm*th or J*hn Tr*v*lt*

    (Names obscured to protect their identities)

    consider yourself lucky you are in UK. Your ass would have been sued 10 times if you were in USA.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Feb 07, 2015 4:53 PM GMT
    They're insecure.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Feb 07, 2015 4:56 PM GMT
    __morphic__ said
    Ohno saidThey might be celebrities like T*m Cr**s*, W*ll Sm*th or J*hn Tr*v*lt*

    (Names obscured to protect their identities)

    consider yourself lucky you are in UK. Your ass would have been sued 10 times if you were in USA.

    They might sue you for the gay thing, but they'll surely put a hit out on you if you offend scientology!icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 6:24 PM GMT
    pazzy saiddespite what some of these posters in here might try to tell you about how places like america, canada and the uk and etc "are accepting of gay people", this is FAR from the truth. homophobia is still widely present even though gays are slowly being accepted to the mainstream. america and the uk actually have gay communities where gays can basically feel comfortable around to an extent. however, outside of that, it's a different world. it's still a "be openly gay at your own risk". some people don't give a fuck. others do and will not hesitate to let you know. don't let these rj'ers fool you. if you decide to move to the states or the uk, you still have to watch your back especially if you're flying around rainbow colors.


    Thanks for sharing. I have come to realize, the web, social media, especially pro-gay friendly sites will present a picture of advance progress in terms of acceptance. I travelled to Philly last fall and just for the fun of it, the guy I was staying with, I decided to hold hands, nobody gave a fuck. When I thought about it though, this was in the 'gayborhood' it didn't feel safe doing it on the train or other parts of the city. Its still better than what exist here where the opportunity of normal expression of your sexuality (not in your face PDA) is denied here.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14360

    Feb 07, 2015 6:32 PM GMT

    Hopefully very soon, Jamaica's national government will get struck by a strong dose of common sense and than realize that homosexuality is just as pure, natural, and normal as heterosexuality. The politicians will than see the total idiocy of discriminating against gay, lesbian, and bisexual people and grant them full protection under the law as well as full equality. Lets hope that this happens very soon.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Feb 07, 2015 6:39 PM GMT
    With the exception of kids still financially dependent on homophobic parents, I truly think things in the US, England, Canada, etc are now at a point that it is kind of cowardly to not be out and visible. I feel a bit of guilt for how little I contributed to the recent opening up of society and believe that our most persuasive argument for equality is simply to be known and liked by the people around us, including those who not long ago would have been potential problems. Like employers.

    There's still fierce competition within the business setting and people have a tendency to promote others who remind them of their younger self and since most guys are straight, well, it could still hurt advancement. But I think it is time to be out.

    Some may have reasons but I think for the most part, to not have a face pic up is because of fear. Others have sacrificed so much for our advancement, it's the least we can do.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 6:45 PM GMT
    I have always had my face pic displayed on my profile here for years until Kevex and Anduru started stealing people's pics and posting them on other websites.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Feb 07, 2015 6:51 PM GMT
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor saidWith the exception of kids still financially dependent on homophobic parents, I truly think things in the US, England, Canada, etc are now at a point that it is kind of cowardly to not be out and visible. I feel a bit of guilt for how little I contributed to the recent opening up of society and believe that our most persuasive argument for equality is simply to be known and liked by the people around us, including those who not long ago would have been potential problems. Like employers.

    There's still fierce competition within the business setting and people have a tendency to promote others who remind them of their younger self and since most guys are straight, well, it could still hurt advancement. But I think it is time to be out.

    Some may have reasons but I think for the most part, to not have a face pic up is because of fear. Others have sacrificed so much for our advancement, it's the least we can do.


    icon_rolleyes.gif once again, maybe you should try to step out of the gay community or your comfort zone and see the world around you. you do realize that there's like 30 odd states where you could actually be fired by an employer because of your sexual orientation?

    you can try to make the whole "it's okay to come out the closet without facing any repercussions" but what you and some of these guys are saying and what's REALLY going on is two different things. i think we need to be honest and realistic for a second because the last 5 years have brought a sense of falsehoods.


    Pazzy, you really are paranoid. Actually, I live in the panhandle of Florida which is jokingly referred to as "LA, lower Alabama." My county is one of the ones that shut down performing all marriages rather than comply with the Court Order. Totally Republican (backward). Anytime anyone suggests it is time for gay men to act like men and take a stand, you've got a thousand reasons why it is easier for them than you. Stand up and be counted. Be authentic. Stop being so afraid. Do what you must do to have self-respect which means not cowering in front of other men. Contribute.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14360

    Feb 07, 2015 6:55 PM GMT
    pazzy said
    roadbikeRob said
    Hopefully very soon, Jamaica's national government will get struck by a strong dose of common sense and than realize that homosexuality is just as pure, natural, and normal as heterosexuality. The politicians will than see the total idiocy of discriminating against gay, lesbian, and bisexual people and grant them full protection under the law as well as full equality. Lets hope that this happens very soon.



    why talk about an area you never stepped foot in? you should be worrying about buffalo.
    You don't make any sense. What does Buffalo have to do with iticon_question.gif We don't have oppressive anti-gay laws in the State of New York. But evidently Jamaica still does which makes life for gay Jamaicans very difficult and unpredictable.

    Shouldn't you be concerned about Newarkicon_question.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 07, 2015 7:06 PM GMT
    PaulDee said... going through a rush of profiles here on RJ and I noticed something...
    realjock is over run with trolls, multiple accounts, special interest. the new owners chose to not clean this up.

    If you see profiles you would like to avoid appreciate you not bitch all about it. Rather you can, block them if you want.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Feb 07, 2015 7:07 PM GMT
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor said
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor saidWith the exception of kids still financially dependent on homophobic parents, I truly think things in the US, England, Canada, etc are now at a point that it is kind of cowardly to not be out and visible. I feel a bit of guilt for how little I contributed to the recent opening up of society and believe that our most persuasive argument for equality is simply to be known and liked by the people around us, including those who not long ago would have been potential problems. Like employers.

    There's still fierce competition within the business setting and people have a tendency to promote others who remind them of their younger self and since most guys are straight, well, it could still hurt advancement. But I think it is time to be out.

    Some may have reasons but I think for the most part, to not have a face pic up is because of fear. Others have sacrificed so much for our advancement, it's the least we can do.


    icon_rolleyes.gif once again, maybe you should try to step out of the gay community or your comfort zone and see the world around you. you do realize that there's like 30 odd states where you could actually be fired by an employer because of your sexual orientation?

    you can try to make the whole "it's okay to come out the closet without facing any repercussions" but what you and some of these guys are saying and what's REALLY going on is two different things. i think we need to be honest and realistic for a second because the last 5 years have brought a sense of falsehoods.


    Pazzy, you really are paranoid. Actually, I live in the panhandle of Florida which is jokingly referred to as "LA, lower Alabama." My county is one of the ones that shut down performing all marriages rather than comply with the Court Order. Totally Republican (backward). Anytime anyone suggests it is time for gay men to act like men and take a stand, you've got a thousand reasons why it is easier for them than you. Stand up and be counted. Be authentic. Stop being so afraid. Do what you must do to have self-respect which means not cowering in front of other men. Contribute.



    here's the problem with what YOU'RE saying.

    you are speaking SOLELY FOR YOURSELF. you are NOT putting into account the other people AROUND you. you can talk about your experience and speak based on that BUT going by what YOU'RE saying, you really do NOT know about the experiences that others around you had to deal with. you're not putting those into account. you say stand up for yourself and etc BUT the reality is you think someone is going to do that shit if they could get their ass beat or even lose their lives over that. i'm 100 percent sure that you certainly don't wave your rainbow flag around everybody you meet simply because you don't know who might give you shit over it and how crazy some people are. if someone does that, i hope they have guns or can fight.

    the town i live in is has a large lgbt community in there but guess what... there's been like 2 people that have been murdered based off of being lgbt. there's been plenty of other incidents where folks have dealt with shit for being gay BUT being that this town is all nice and all, you wouldn't know if you didn't live here or 5 minute news story. not saying that someone shouldn't come out the closet.. just saying that telling someone that it's okay to come out the closet because it's acceptable like that is clear misinformation.

    Pazzy, all I said was the reason people don't come out is because they'e afraid. You're afraid. You need to change your life so you don't live in fear. That's no way to live. I'm not being critical. I lived that way for years. But times have changed. It's time to stand up for yourself. Leave. Move. Confront your oppressors.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 08, 2015 5:08 AM GMT
    They're mostly fake profiles. And some are just ashamed to be associated with other gays.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 08, 2015 10:18 PM GMT

    Paul, awhile back someone took a member's pics here and used them to find him on FB, and exposed him.


  • mystery905

    Posts: 745

    Feb 09, 2015 1:26 AM GMT
    Another possibility is that some may be aesthetically challenged above the neck.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 09, 2015 2:15 AM GMT
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor said
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor said
    pazzy said
    Destinharbor said




    Pazzy, all I said was the reason people don't come out is because they'e afraid. You're afraid. You need to change your life so you don't live in fear. That's no way to live. I'm not being critical. I lived that way for years. But times have changed. It's time to stand up for yourself. Leave. Move. Confront your oppressors.


    i'm working on it. will be out the closet this year to my friends and some of my extended family. don't think i'll be running away anytime soon. if they drop me, so be it. icon_neutral.gif

    Good for you!
  • TheBaise

    Posts: 363

    Feb 09, 2015 12:50 PM GMT
    I've got little respect for guys who hide their faces / yet come here and drop political grenades / and then run and hide back in their protective little shells / like KissTheSky or Creature / even though I agree with their political slant. We all need to own up to our beliefs / and not be complete tools about it!