Saying i love you

  • AnonymousNYC

    Posts: 60

    Mar 11, 2015 9:02 PM GMT
    Jokingly you say it and he laughs but doesnt say it back, but he shows it.
    What do u do?
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    Mar 11, 2015 9:43 PM GMT
    AnonymousNYC saidJokingly you say it and he laughs but doesnt say it back, but he shows it.
    What do u do?

    Let time pass.

    Why would you say it "jokingly"? Not a great idea.
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    Mar 11, 2015 10:40 PM GMT
    Action speaks louder than those words. If he's just all talk without any real actions, then drop him. icon_lol.gif
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    Mar 11, 2015 10:59 PM GMT
    AnonymousNYC saidJokingly you say it and he laughs but doesnt say it back, but he shows it.
    What do u do?


    Let me guess.....you've been dating for two whole months?
  • TheBaise

    Posts: 362

    Mar 12, 2015 12:03 AM GMT
    Hey man / always cry out / I Love YUUUUU! / during an ejaculation. He'll know you're sincere and totally in to him.
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    Mar 12, 2015 12:25 AM GMT
    Straight guys don't tell you they love you unless they're drunk, but then they also dry hump their pickup.


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    Mar 12, 2015 12:43 AM GMT
    AnonymousNYC saidJokingly you say it and he laughs but doesnt say it back, but he shows it.
    What do u do?


    Don't say it jokingly, and I suspect his reaction will be different, which may be why you said it jokingly in the first place, as you might be afraid of him getting cold feet. icon_wink.gif However, that was in fact a good start to getting serious.
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    Mar 12, 2015 2:13 PM GMT
    If you feel it say it (genuinely). Don't put any requirements on when/if/how he says it. When I felt it while dating my partner, I said it and he didn't at first. A few weeks passed and I continued saying it, and then suddenly one day he said it back. It was real and from him without any pressure from me which made it really meaningful. We all have a past and things in our head that can make opening up more or less a challenge, but giving those in our life the respect and space to show themselves to us in their own way can be a gift. My partner and I have been together for nearly 15 years. I know now why he was slower in saying it and had I gotten hung up on the how's and whys back then I might have unintentionally pushed away a man who has brought so much joy into my life. Be genuine, open and honest in your feelings and let others make their choices.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4433

    Mar 12, 2015 3:55 PM GMT
    RudeMech saidIf you feel it say it (genuinely). Don't put any requirements on when/if/how he says it. When I felt it while dating my partner, I said it and he didn't at first. A few weeks passed and I continued saying it, and then suddenly one day he said it back. It was real and from him without any pressure from me which made it really meaningful. We all have a past and things in our head that can make opening up more or less a challenge, but giving those in our life the respect and space to show themselves to us in their own way can be a gift. My partner and I have been together for nearly 15 years. I know now why he was slower in saying it and had I gotten hung up on the how's and whys back then I might have unintentionally pushed away a man who has brought so much joy into my life. Be genuine, open and honest in your feelings and let others make their choices.

    Smart. True. You may love your guy but still not know him through and through. No matter what anyone says, we all have baggage in the sense that we are collections of experiences, some good and some bad that contributed to who we are now. Give him time. If he shows it, he's on the path.
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    Mar 12, 2015 4:38 PM GMT
    Actions can be just as deceptive as words.
  • CX838

    Posts: 100

    Mar 12, 2015 4:51 PM GMT
    If a straight guy say I love you to us. it means I am horn or I gotta cum
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    Mar 12, 2015 4:55 PM GMT
    Just watched the latest episode of Looking, the gay soap opera on HBO. One of the characters said the magic words, "I Love You." (Won't spoil it by saying who said it to who.)
  • Kel_

    Posts: 1360

    Mar 12, 2015 7:59 PM GMT
    My favourite part of this episode of HBO's Looking.

    https://youtu.be/woyVXeNg1BQ?t=2m56s

    I adore these two so much, the on-screen chemistry says it all. Wish they end up happily ever after for this show.
    #TeamKevin #RussellTovey
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    Mar 12, 2015 8:02 PM GMT
    Personally I believe everyone has different barriers to love that we build up from a young age out of protection. We grow up loving everything but slowly learn to narrow which we love out of fear, to prepare for the pain of isolation.

    One big point for me about love, is that in society we don't say I love you just to any person we love, it has to be to a personal whom we love more than everyone else. Since we as a society rarely say I love you to anyone, saying it someone is a big deal and comes with a lot of pressure. If we lived in a wold where we said I love you more often we would have to come up with more articulate ways of expressing love for someone we love deeply.

    If someone can't say I love it means they have trouble manifesting love through speech but they may in fact love you. I try not to pay too much attention to these details and feel troubled over other people's inadequacies since I am a self aware person who wishes to grow, find answers, and ultimately find my own desires even if it means finding someone new(and i always up getting what i need anyways); sadly most people I've met don't look deeply into themselves and in return find themselves running in circles when it comes to relationships and love.

    Ultimately just become more aware of what you want and need and share it with who you love/care about. If you're meant to stay with someone they will work hard to get you, or get you to, your desire. If not, then trust you will find it yourself, or you will lead yourself to someone who will help you in your pursuit.
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    Mar 12, 2015 8:56 PM GMT
    ^check out the big brain on this one

    oh and

    Hi Kel

    LOVE you
    tumblr_nkyim6zxXf1qaxfrto4_250.gif
  • Kel_

    Posts: 1360

    Mar 12, 2015 9:43 PM GMT
    dustin_K_tx said^check out the big brain on this one

    oh and

    Hi Kel

    LOVE you
    tumblr_nkyim6zxXf1qaxfrto4_250.gif


    They're the best! Even though some people disagree, I believe they're meant for each other. I'm addicted to seeing these two on-screen icon_smile.gif
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    Mar 13, 2015 12:33 AM GMT
    My current bf of 2 years said he loved me after our 1st month of dating. I couldn't say it back at the time, but I didn't want him to leave me. After he said it, and I stood back in shock, I could see how hurt he was. He mumbled something like, "it was stupid, it was nothing." And my heart broke. I remembered holding him and not letting go, and then we cuddled and fell asleep on the couch.

    The next day, we pretended like nothing happened. Our relationship continued, at its own pace, and now I do know that I love him. We don't say the words much. I wonder if it's because I ruined it. Even now when I bring that day up, he changes the subject and tells me how hurt he was back then. But he did and he does love me, b/c he stayed with me, even though there was no certainty I'd love him back. I wish I could've handled that night better. I wish he didn't fall in love so quickly, and let me catch up with him. But I do think a part of the reason I learned to love him is b/c of his gentle heart, pure and brave.
  • AnonymousNYC

    Posts: 60

    Mar 13, 2015 7:07 AM GMT
    RudeMech saidIf you feel it say it (genuinely). Don't put any requirements on when/if/how he says it. When I felt it while dating my partner, I said it and he didn't at first. A few weeks passed and I continued saying it, and then suddenly one day he said it back. It was real and from him without any pressure from me which made it really meaningful. We all have a past and things in our head that can make opening up more or less a challenge, but giving those in our life the respect and space to show themselves to us in their own way can be a gift. My partner and I have been together for nearly 15 years. I know now why he was slower in saying it and had I gotten hung up on the how's and whys back then I might have unintentionally pushed away a man who has brought so much joy into my life. Be genuine, open and honest in your feelings and let others make their choices.

    That was beautiful.. Surprisingly and thankfully it didnt scare ur partner away..
    After 15 yrs do you two have children?
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    Mar 13, 2015 4:04 PM GMT
    Kel_ saidMy favourite part of this episode of HBO's Looking.

    https://youtu.be/woyVXeNg1BQ?t=2m56s

    I adore these two so much, the on-screen chemistry says it all. Wish they end up happily ever after for this show.
    #TeamKevin #RussellTovey


    If they did that now, that would be the end of the series. Total happiness = no drama.
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    Mar 14, 2015 11:03 AM GMT
    TheBaise saidHey man / always cry out / I Love YUUUUU! / during an ejaculation. He'll know you're sincere and totally in to him.


    LOL - it took me a couple of go arounds to figure out that some guys will say the L word during sex and then have no recollection of it later!

    And as far as the OP, if the guy is SHOWING it, isn't that more important than SAYING it?
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1116

    Mar 14, 2015 1:54 PM GMT
    A blind person have its six senses more developed, then a seeing person who can see! that said an "I LOVE YOU" is not how it is meant in words or actions, but in how one chooses to express it through the senses!

    When younger I was a loner, not by choice, but because I felt most people were too caught up in themselves, and so I avoided them, as I was raised in a loving and accepting family oriented environment. As I've gotten older and wiser, to me it doesn't matter how an "I LOVE YOU" is expressed to me, so as long as the person feels most comfortable expressing it.

    I learned that an expression of love is more about being true to one self then anything else!