Army guys more likely to cheat?

  • Hurley615

    Posts: 8

    Mar 25, 2015 1:27 AM GMT
    Honest question, please do not flame. Just looking for opinions / speaking from personal experience.

    Do you think army guys are harder to be in a relationship with? Due to the fact that they're away for periods of time, and also that they are going to be around a lot of other guys?(some probably closeted)

    I've dated 2 army guys and neither were able to keep it in their pants. Neither could resist getting on craigslist, grindr, etc in the relationship, and when I caught each one I broke it off.

    It just seems like common sense that being around more guys, especially in that setting (showers anyone?) would lead to more temptation and possibly damage a relationship. (I know I know..insecurity..)
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    Mar 25, 2015 3:46 AM GMT
    I don't think the showers are the problem, lol. After a while, when you are living that close and under those circumstances, it's not that exciting anymore. Comes down to character.
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    Mar 25, 2015 4:05 AM GMT
    A few generations ago one of the classic examples of infidelity and sources of jokes was the "traveling salesman." Home separation with celibacy caused a great temptation to cheat that it was assumed many men could not resist. Why would the military with their own periods of long deployment be any different?

    So yeah, Army guys may be more prone to cheating, when they're away from you for extended periods. Don't know what to say about that.

    Except to say, are YOU not tempted to cheat when HE'S away? If not, then you're a treasure he should hang onto, and a fool if he doesn't.
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    Mar 25, 2015 1:30 PM GMT
    Don't make rash judgments on a group of guys because you've had two "bad experiences". not all army guys cheat. it's really that plain and simple.

  • Mar 25, 2015 4:06 PM GMT
    Everyone's not in an open relationship by now? icon_razz.gif
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    Mar 25, 2015 4:19 PM GMT
    JockPunkBohemian saidEveryone's not in an open relationship by now? icon_razz.gif

    We would be if our boyfriends weren't so selfish.

    To the OP
    it's all relevant.
    How many West-Pack widow boyfriends are on Grinder right now?
    Is it crazy to think this cheating is a downside to the ending of DADT.
  • tazzari

    Posts: 2929

    Mar 25, 2015 4:25 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidA few generations ago one of the classic examples of infidelity and sources of jokes was the "traveling salesman." Home separation with celibacy caused a great temptation to cheat that it was assumed many men could not resist. Why would the military with their own periods of long deployment be any different?

    So yeah, Army guys may be more prone to cheating, when they're away from you for extended periods. Don't know what to say about that.

    Except to say, are YOU not tempted to cheat when HE'S away? If not, then you're a treasure he should hang onto, and a fool if he doesn't.


    Art, I have huge respect for the military, but I turn to you as having far more experience: couldn't a contributing factor be the general atmosphere of :hitting the bars and scoring," along with the natural urges of any healthy, fit young guy to get laid? seems kind of natural to me - commitment and stability are things that come with more age.
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    Mar 25, 2015 9:15 PM GMT
    ^
    Do all your 'best' thoughts come at two-minute intervals?
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    Mar 25, 2015 10:45 PM GMT
    Not every army dudes are, but as you coined 'most likely'. Since the couple are involved in a long distance relationship; I'm not validating their reasons to seek for sexual comfort.

    Personally, I think it's better to not get involve in a long distance relationship. If you are already, or intend to get into one, you have some options:
    - Allow a (temporary) open relationship (while he's out the country). P.S. Ask him to play it safe and keeps the contents to himself, no need to tell you the process.
    - Set up limits and stuff that aren't meant to be cross.
    - Not setting up limits in black and white but completely trusting him.

    My another advice to OP is, try to look for a man that doesn't require leaving the country/state. While not all long distance relationships are toxics nor ends up into a cheating fiesta, but you'd definitely want to lower the risk of cheating.

    Best of luck to ya.
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    Mar 25, 2015 10:49 PM GMT
    You shouldn't leave the Navy and the Marines out of this!
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    Mar 26, 2015 1:56 AM GMT
    Military guys should be allowed to cheat, whenever they want to.

    After all, they put their lives on the line for our freedom. The least we can do is give them the freedom to fuck whomever the fuck they wanna fuck, whenever the fuck they feel like fucking. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Mar 26, 2015 2:19 AM GMT
    tazzari said
    Art, I have huge respect for the military, but I turn to you as having far more experience: couldn't a contributing factor be the general atmosphere of :hitting the bars and scoring," along with the natural urges of any healthy, fit young guy to get laid? seems kind of natural to me - commitment and stability are things that come with more age.

    First, thank you very much for your compliment regarding the military.

    Second, I agree with you completely that young men have natural urges. Especially in the testosterone-fueled military environment, and the missions in which they must operate. I'm not sure if bar culture really plays a bigger part than for anyone else.

    But I added the factor of isolation from home & lovers, and the temptations that may create. It's the perfect storm for cheating.

    I won't say I approve of it, just that I can understand the dynamics to some degree. So that the OP's experiences with the 2 Army guys he dated don't surprise me. Given his own age I'll assume what their ages were, and it would fit the model.

    "Army guys more likely to cheat?" Perhaps, I have no statistical evidence, just anecdotal observations. But we sure read a lot here about civilian gays in that same age range cheating fairly routinely, too. So I dunno if it's solely the military, or in combination with age factors as you proposed, that may possibly make it even more intense.
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    Mar 26, 2015 2:24 AM GMT
    robbaker said5678 pump that hole till constipate
    9 10 11 12 ahhhh, I'm done.

    NEXT!!!
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    Mar 26, 2015 7:39 AM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    tazzari said
    Art, I have huge respect for the military, but I turn to you as having far more experience: couldn't a contributing factor be the general atmosphere of :hitting the bars and scoring," along with the natural urges of any healthy, fit young guy to get laid? seems kind of natural to me - commitment and stability are things that come with more age.

    First, thank you very much for your compliment regarding the military.

    Second, I agree with you completely that young men have natural urges. Especially in the testosterone-fueled military environment, and the missions in which they must operate. I'm not sure if bar culture really plays a bigger part than for anyone else.

    But I added the factor of isolation from home & lovers, and the temptations that may create. It's the perfect storm for cheating.

    I won't say I approve of it, just that I can understand the dynamics to some degree. So that the OP's experiences with the 2 Army guys he dated don't surprise me. Given his own age I'll assume what their ages were, and it would fit the model.

    "Army guys more likely to cheat?" Perhaps, I have no statistical evidence, just anecdotal observations. But we sure read a lot here about civilian gays in that same age range cheating fairly routinely, too. So I dunno if it's solely the military, or in combination with age factors as you proposed, that may possibly make it even more intense.


    I don't know if there'd be sufficient quantity of gays in the army to make this a factor, though I suspect it would though, would be peer pressure and competiveness to 'get laid'.

    I would think it would no different than what you'd have among a group of non military straight 18-22 yr olds.
  • ATLANTIS7

    Posts: 1213

    Mar 26, 2015 10:25 AM GMT
    All men cheat.
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    Mar 26, 2015 11:52 AM GMT
    freedomisntfree said

    I would think it would no different than what you'd have among a group of non military straight 18-22 yr olds.


    You're exactly right. the OP just had two bad experiences with Army guys. he could have just easily had two bad experiences with "insert any person here".
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    Mar 27, 2015 5:06 AM GMT
    It's got nothing to do with the occupation. It is solely the mindset of the individual in question. They lack good character and their moral compass points down.