Don't Call Me Daddy: Loving Someone 25 Years Younger

  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Apr 24, 2015 7:28 PM GMT
    Don't Call Me Daddy: Loving Someone 25 Years Younger


    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/blair-fell/dont-call-me-daddy-loving_b_7128576.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000050
  • Tooji

    Posts: 26

    Apr 25, 2015 1:08 AM GMT
    I had a thing for a guy who was 29 at that time (now 30), and i'm only 19. I really fell for him and it seemed perfect. But because of the age difference and the fact that he lives 2 hours from me didn't really let it happen.
    I still think about it sometimes, wondering how would it be...
    But yeah, glad for the one who wrote the article - hope it works out!
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    Apr 25, 2015 6:56 PM GMT
    He does not call be daddy but I'm in the same situation. I certainly found that guys near my age have agendas which guarantee their singleness where younger guys are way more available.

    The problem is t fear of the future. Let that go, live in the now and things are fine.
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    Apr 25, 2015 7:08 PM GMT
    I had my first serious bf at 24, he was 42. I called him a lot of things, but never Daddy. icon_smile.gif
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 1031

    Apr 25, 2015 8:27 PM GMT
    A while back, a young friend wanted to fix me up with a friend of his, a 20-something triathlete who's into older guys. My friend described me to him as, "He's more a dude than a dad."

    The guy's response: "But I want a dad."

    I find a lot of young guys want a daddy, most likely because they were never accepted by their own fathers. It can be cute at times, if a little sad. But when guys in their 30s still want someone to call daddy, it's really not so cute anymore.
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    Apr 25, 2015 9:43 PM GMT
    My guy is 25 years younger than me and has never called me daddy but come May 4th we will be calling each other husband/marido, spouse/esposo!

    I hate it when old married hetero couples call each other momma and poppa.
  • Sincityfan

    Posts: 409

    Apr 26, 2015 12:41 AM GMT
    then don't date someone young enough to be your son.
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    Apr 26, 2015 2:04 AM GMT
    bro4bro saidA while back, a young friend wanted to fix me up with a friend of his, a 20-something triathlete who's into older guys. My friend described me to him as, "He's more a dude than a dad."

    The guy's response: "But I want a dad."

    I find a lot of young guys want a daddy, most likely because they were never accepted by their own fathers. It can be cute at times, if a little sad. But when guys in their 30s still want someone to call daddy, it's really not so cute anymore.


    It's true, and although it's sensible for men to want this role in someone if they in fact are lacking this kind of energy, I believe it's a result of extreme trauma growing up through deprivation of a strong protective energy. I actually did not have any male role models growing up and I did/do have an attraction for distinguished mature men, but as I'm growing up I actually am realizing now that i am more of a dad than most men around me, and I don't really need that male role model as much. The purpose of being attracted to a "father figure" is to merge that into yourself, not to chase dads around your whole life. I think a healthy relationship is always aimed to be mutual in power, and sometimes when I see young men broadcasting that they are daddy chasers, I feel like they are inadvertently exposing to the world that they are vulnerable and need help, and It makes me feel intrusive because I'm quite confident these men probably have no idea what they're projecting to the world about their deepest needs. Once again i am not judging these young men, but I just would like them to grow into their own instead of chasing a fantasy,, in hopes that it will somehow grant them fulfillment by finding a dad to protect them forever from their own fear; we're all born to grow into fatherhood
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    Apr 26, 2015 12:41 PM GMT
    Great article, I guess sometimes age shouldn't matter icon_cool.gif
  • Svnw688

    Posts: 3350

    Apr 27, 2015 6:48 AM GMT
    UndercoverMan saidMy guy is 25 years younger than me and has never called me daddy but come May 4th we will be calling each other husband/marido, spouse/esposo!

    I hate it when old married hetero couples call each other momma and poppa.


    LMAO, I dislike that too. And inter-age dating/marriage is totally normal. Anyone who suggests otherwise is a f-ing hater, so let them hate, you get yours and let the chips fall where they may. icon_cool.gif
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    Apr 27, 2015 8:16 AM GMT
    I have no problems with younger-older couple. But I believe younger guys should do a bit of growing up, become more independent, and emotionally stronger. While growing up in a homophobic society, it isn't easy for many of these younger guys to interact on a daily basis with people of same age. It's not like straight world where you mingle with kid's your own age, share your sexual attraction, and have a healthy interaction which doesn't make you feel as an outsider. I believer many of these younger guys are quite vulnerable and emotionally not that strong. They want someone to make them feel safe and protected.

  • Apr 28, 2015 6:48 AM GMT
    Both of my past relationships were with men 25 years my senior.

    Both acknowledged my being on my own at 18 and putting myself through college, working, getting a car, and apartments (multiple.)

    I didn't get to call either Daddy. icon_cry.gif (Such a turn on for me.)
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    Apr 28, 2015 7:00 AM GMT
    My cut off age is around 7-9 years older/younger. Never been with a guy over 39! Lol, I dated two guys who were like 19 yo before! But lately, I just decide to stick my same-age range demographic. I have to be like 50 or something, liking a 25 yo dude in order for him to call me daddy! Lol icon_lol.gif
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    Apr 28, 2015 10:54 PM GMT
    I wonder if guys who like "daddies" would still be looking for "daddies" at age 65.
  • whytehot

    Posts: 1165

    Apr 29, 2015 12:04 AM GMT
    Ok... so the thoughts in that article are no different from that of any chickenhawk putting up with "typical 20-something bullshit" from his boy toy for the sake of amazing sex, and oh he reminds him of his youth... solid foundations for a relationship right there rolleyes.gif
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    Apr 29, 2015 4:58 AM GMT
    I have been called "daddy" many times. At 37, I don't consider myself to be a daddy, but to a 18 year old, I guess I am. I have officially crossed the threshold. Lol
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    Apr 29, 2015 10:49 AM GMT
    I can say "YO DADDY!" to someone who is younger than me. If he looks like a fertile male, capable of siring children, he is 'Daddy' material! lol

    Being literally 'son' age, (20 years or so younger) misses the point.

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    Apr 30, 2015 4:25 PM GMT
    why are soooo many gays hungup on the age factor? adult is adult and is between two consenting parties.....we're the first ones to jump and scream when the 'straight' world makes judgements about us, but we are also the first to cast a stone.....fuck me to tears....time to give it a rest....perhaps a couple of barn yard animals would be more to some likings?
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    Apr 30, 2015 6:02 PM GMT
    I could care less if someone calls me daddy, as long as they don't try to collect child support from me if we break up.
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    May 01, 2015 7:56 PM GMT
    JamesH6097 saidGreat article, I guess sometimes age shouldn't matter icon_cool.gif

    It really never should, other than your own attractions - that is, never let yourself be bothered by what other people may think, whether you're considered cradle-robbing or daddy chasing. If you click with someone, go for it, whatever their age. You have only one life. In my case, before finding my partner (who is 10 years younger), I dated or had BFs who were from 20 years older to 15 years younger. Chronological age was never a consideration.
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    May 01, 2015 7:58 PM GMT
    DOMINUS saidI wonder if guys who like "daddies" would still be looking for "daddies" at age 65.

    Some may become "daddies" themselves, and some might still seek out a partner who serves some sort of more protective role, who happens to be chronologically younger.
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    May 01, 2015 9:26 PM GMT
    Great read. Since when was love conventional? I've actually been in the shoes of this so called Colin in the article, where I had my fair share of "Dads". However, they too had a laundry list of pre-requisites, that I did not currently meet, such as a high paying career, life experiences, location, and quite surprising- my age. However, looking back on it, I don't think it was me who had the issue. I think it was the guy or "Dad" I was seeing. I never had a negative out view in life, never saw age or color as a barrier that could stop me from loving someone and for that, the world was truly my oyster (Ignorance is bliss as you can say). I was no ones broken goods, I was just living life, and was looking for someone to compliment that.


    With a few more years under my belt I truly do feel for the older gentlemen who has this "Need" to find "The ONE" and will cast aside potential people that can have positive and life changing impacts on their lives. Heck, if the this older guy I was seeing just saw it through the tunnel with me as I was going through school, and what not who's to say that we wouldn't be happily be together to this day? I can also say if he gave me a few more years he would have seen that I've gotten that career he spoke of, a career that is able to help me stand on my own two feet regardless of his income. I've gotten this so called "life experiences" as they called it, as I feel like that isn't such a pre-requisite as people claim it to be, as everyone has life experiences regardless of age. I'm able to travel freely, heck probably move to a different state if I chose to, to be with the one I love.

    What I didn't like about the article was that the person speaking made it sound like Colin's age was very much a turn off even to the very end. But other then that a very good read. Sorry for the rant, but I feel like there should be younger men who should shed some light that not all younger guys are red flags, when it comes to potential partners and not some pin point fling bound to happen.