A NIGHT THAT WON'T GO AWAY!

  • Enderby

    Posts: 24

    Jan 26, 2009 6:03 AM GMT
    Hey guys...I always have enjoyed the angles and takes people get on their various issues they post here. I have one, so here goes.

    On new years eve, my BF and I went to a party at a friend's house to party. The majority of the people at this party knew each other and are gay as well. Being the night it was, the booze was flowing freely. by about 1 am, maybe about 15 or so of us were pretty messed up. Of course, we were all stumbling around, hugging, etc. by that point as well.

    A mutual friend decided to come over to us to say hi. My BF asked me to flex for him, which of course I gladly did (come on, most of us work hard here...wouldn't you?) Our friend at that point reached down both our pants, which we stopped him from doing right away. That night, he continued to be a pest. Both my Bf and I passed out at about 4am on the couch and we found our friend really close to us on the couch. I woke up again, and he was trying to give me a BJ. He also had my BF's belt off.

    The following morning, my BF talked about what happened and decided we were both there and that nothing really happened. Thus, we felt it not worth making a big deal over a drunken evening.

    Case closed? Not really. Last night, we were at the same house with the same cast of characters over. This time our friend was drunk again (we were not drinking) and he was telling everyone what had happened. He kept calling himself a "home wrecker" and a "sex toy." He also was saying that he got us off (obviously this didn't happen).

    Now my question is this: what is the best way to resolve this? Should we have a talk with him (btw, when he sobered up, he didn't mention it anymore) or simply just let it go? Also, if it happens again, any tips on what to say?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 7:25 AM GMT
    Personally, I'd tell the little fucknut to keep his hands to himself unless he wants his face messed up.. all my friends know how far they can go with me and none of them overstep that line, drunk or sober, sure, they may push it but they stay respectable at all times...
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    Jan 26, 2009 1:24 PM GMT
    I'd definitely talk to him (when he's sober) and tell him you and your BF don't fuck around with other people (or if you do, that you don't fuck around with friends, or whatever ...) and if your friendship was important to him, he needs to keep it as friends and keep his hands off both of you (separately or together). I'd also say that telling people that things happened when they didn't is bullshit and has to stop.
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    Jan 26, 2009 2:18 PM GMT
    You and your BF shoud get out of that guy, it sounds your messing with the wrong element. He's a big mouth!
  • Laurence

    Posts: 942

    Jan 26, 2009 2:22 PM GMT
    You can either ignore him or play him at his own game.

    Tell everyone, when he's around, that he did infact give you a bJ and that it was terrible and that youre partner said he was the crappest lay he'd ever had.

    Definately not worth the effort.

    Sometimes it's best to laugh these situations off and make light of them.

    Loz
  • Latenight30

    Posts: 1525

    Jan 26, 2009 3:02 PM GMT
    I agree with Loz,
    either play it off or make him out to be bad. but I'm sure the rest of your friends can see where it's comming from. Don't sweat it. As long as it didn't damage your relationship, you guys are fine.
    but in future parties I'd keep an arms distance from this guy, he sounds like trouble, anyway.
  • SpartanJock

    Posts: 199

    Jan 26, 2009 3:27 PM GMT
    Definitely tell him to leave ya's well enough alone, and that his attention was not welcomed.

    As for your other friends, don't take the situation seriously. If anyone asks directly, then explain your side matter-of-factly and leave it at that. This guy is not worth the time and effort to go into much detail with anyone.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 3:35 PM GMT
    Have a one on one and set him straight and if that doesn't work, pull him aside once more and tell him never to come around, period.

    And if THAT doesn't work, fuck him up in front of everyone!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 3:46 PM GMT
    I'm a contrarian. Go for a 3way with him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 5:50 PM GMT
    make better 'friends.'
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 6:12 PM GMT
    Laurence saidYou can either ignore him or play him at his own game.

    Tell everyone, when he's around, that he did infact give you a bJ and that it was terrible and that youre partner said he was the crappest lay he'd ever had.

    Definately not worth the effort.

    Sometimes it's best to laugh these situations off and make light of them.

    Loz

    Yeah, if it were me I'd have smiled & joked about it in front of my other friends at the party, making it obvious I didn't take his claims seriously. And that in any case my BF & I weren't flustered by him, or think anything of it. Getting upset might bolster his claims. If the guy was drunk, and perhaps often is, it's doubtful the others would take him seriously, anyway.

    But I'd also speak to him privately, when he's sober, and let him know that kind of behavior on New Year's Eve, and his subsequent bragging about it, are not welcome. If he denies remembering it, tell him there were witnesses.

    I had an ex-BF who'd get drunk at parties, especially on gin, which he himself said made him act like a "wounded dog." He'd strip down to his underwear, which nobody else was doing, and regale everyone with stories of his great wealth.

    He really is a millionaire, which I know to be true, but hearing him brag about it was about as welcome to our friends as was his prancing around in his Jockeys. And then he'd try to hit on guys, sometimes right in front of me. There are men who simply can't hold their liquor, and Enderby's friend is evidently one of them.
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    Jan 26, 2009 6:15 PM GMT
    I would dump him as friend. All of my friends know wht would happen if they took liberties like that...nolr would I ever do that to them.

    Now you and your bf learned a lesson "don't Flex on anyone while drunk".
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    Jan 26, 2009 6:21 PM GMT
    i thought you contracted gonorrhea lol
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jan 26, 2009 6:29 PM GMT
    I think you need to talk with your bf about this guy and how to handle it together. How good of a friend (thus important) is he to you both? Also how important is it (to both of you together) to respond?

    If you bring it up, there are going to be hurt feelings and alot of resentment.. and may not just be limited to this person (if he has other close friends that are also friends of yours). My suggestion is, to say nothing, but keep the dude at arms length in the future (and not allow yourself to be in that situation again). If he's cool when sober, be cool when in a group with him, but again, just pass on the drinking activities when he's a part of it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 6:59 PM GMT
    Don't worry about something in the future that may not even happen. Just stay away from him or from situations like you found yourselves in on New Year's Eve. When you touch a hot stove and get burned what do you do?
  • drakutis

    Posts: 586

    Jan 26, 2009 7:07 PM GMT
    czarodziej saidmake better 'friends.'


    I agree with that. You might want to reevaluate that person and the group of people you associate with. Not a judgment on you two guys, just an observation.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 7:35 PM GMT
    Only one other said three-way. Is this out of the question? I mean, he's hot, right? Why not have the crime fit the punishment and be done with it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 9:32 PM GMT
    May I ask why your BF asked you to flex for this mutual friend? Doesn't that make your BF responsible for opening Pandora's box?

    Anyway, I've been through a similar experience. The guy took total advantage of our friendship. I ended up kicking him to the curb quicker than Nestle because he refused to conform. You would be wise to do the same.

    If you're a total pig (and not in the good way), you should fuck him. Give the cock sore what he wants ... what he's been bragging about ... then kick him to the curb.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 9:33 PM GMT

    Dear Enderby,

    I apologize to you both. Please find it in your hearts to forgive me. I just get lonely sometimes, that's all. And alcohol seems to be my only friend. I shall come clean with the others as well.

    Again, my apologies.

    Your party pal,
    ZiMsTeR xx
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 9:52 PM GMT
    hahaha zimmy, u would :p
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 9:57 PM GMT
    ZiMsTeR said
    Dear Enderby,

    I apologize to you both. Please find it in your hearts to forgive me. I just get lonely sometimes, that's all. And alcohol seems to be my only friend. I shall come clean with the others as well.

    Again, my apologies.

    Your party pal,
    ZiMsTeR xx


    Just so long as you don't mention the night concerning you, me, tutus, dildoes, crisco, and Chinese hookers
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 10:00 PM GMT
    ZIM! i thought the tutus were OUR special thing!!


    lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 10:01 PM GMT
    czarodziej saidZIM! i thought the tutus were OUR special thing!!


    lol


    Zim lied to youicon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2009 10:10 PM GMT
    Sorry ladies, the bitch took it back!

    n669316244_1445447_9155.jpg

    She left me the staple gun, tho.
  • Enderby

    Posts: 24

    Jan 27, 2009 1:40 AM GMT
    wait for it .....

    wait for it.....

    this thread's been hijacked.