I am still not happy with myself

  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 26, 2015 6:04 PM GMT
    I think I look ugly I am not a muscle Mary and have a thin waist moreover I am black and that makes me look even ten times uglier I have to work hard to get attention from other gay men

    I am just not happy
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 26, 2015 6:15 PM GMT
    Personally, if anything, I'd say you're handsome. You may not appeal to everyone, but hey, not everyone appeals to everyone.

    Also, being black =/= ugly. It does NOT equal that way. Take this from me because I've been in your position - if there's anything ugly about you, it's the fact that you don't love yourself and that you keep feeling sorry for yourself for whatever reason. You have to love yourself before someone can love you, and if you can't find the energy to do that, then no one else should.

    Maybe you have to work harder than someone in finding a mate, but it will be easier if you loved yourself, stop putting yourself, and be yourself. Accept yourself. Self-confidence and acceptance are usually what attracts other people.

    And what is a "Muscle Mary" by the way? Because you look buff as hell in your profile picture. Other than that, don't focus so much on finding a man. Travel. Do something you always wanted to do. Go out with friends. Go see a movie. Treat yourself.

    Treat. Yo. Self.

    giphy.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 26, 2015 6:19 PM GMT
    When I was just a little girl
    I asked my mother what will I be
    Will I be pretty will I be rich
    Here's what she said to me

  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    May 26, 2015 6:39 PM GMT
    Not this shit again..Go make a therapist rich.
  • bobbobbob

    Posts: 2812

    May 26, 2015 7:35 PM GMT
    mybud saidNot this shit again..Go make a therapist rich.


    ^^^^^
    He might make a therapist suicidal.

    Damn. Matthew you must be so lacking of insight you'd probably have to use three fingers to dig up in your asshole to find out how full of stupid shit you are.
  • mystery905

    Posts: 745

    May 26, 2015 8:37 PM GMT
    Nobody likes a whiny bitch, and that is what you appear to be.

    Be a man: confident and proud of who you are, and others will be attracted to this.
  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 26, 2015 9:27 PM GMT
    mystery905 saidNobody likes a whiny bitch, and that is what you appear to be.

    Be a man: confident and proud of who you are, and others will be attracted to this.


    When there is a gay racial hierarchy and I am second down to white man because I am black?
  • metta

    Posts: 39099

    May 26, 2015 9:29 PM GMT
    ^
    If you really believe that then maybe you should consider moving to a country that is predominantly black so you can't use that excuse anymore. I don't think that making several thread about how you have no self esteem is helping you. If you see a problem, go find a healthy solution that will work for you.
  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 26, 2015 9:31 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]metta8 said[/cite]^
    If you really believe that then maybe you should consider moving to a country that is predominantly black so you can't use that excuse anymore.[/quote

    I am not attracted to the majority of black men
  • metta

    Posts: 39099

    May 26, 2015 9:34 PM GMT
    Stop focusing on this stuff for now. Take up meditation and learn how to rest your mind....look up theravada buddhism meditation.

    All of these desires you have are causing you to needlessly suffer (dukkha).



    http://www.contemplativemind.org/practices/tree/loving-kindness
  • venue35

    Posts: 4644

    May 26, 2015 9:47 PM GMT
    I told you to bleach yo skin and you'd be happy but you didn't listen which means you love yo misery!
  • bobbobbob

    Posts: 2812

    May 26, 2015 9:59 PM GMT
    metta8 said^
    If you really believe that then maybe you should consider moving to a country that is predominantly black so you can't use that excuse anymore. I don't think that making several thread about how you have no self esteem is helping you. If you see a problem, go find a healthy solution that will work for you.


    ^^^
    That won't solve what's wrong with Matthew. It's not where he lives that's his problem. He IS the source of his problems... and until he realizes it and stops inflicting his idiotic self created repetitive bullshit on everyone else he will continue to be his own fucking worst problem.
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    May 26, 2015 10:05 PM GMT
    Matthew, if you really believe that racial hierarchy bull shit you aren't second to white men. You are 4th behind Asians and Latinos.
    But stop giving a fuck what 'they' think. You only need to find one man. But if you do find a man of any color who is a good guy and finds you attractive and wants to bump ugliest with you he will be turned off by hour chronic whininess and crushing self hatred. Happiness doesn't come from a relationship. Happiness is something you bring to a relationship!
  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 26, 2015 10:51 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]Wyndahoi said[/cite]Matthew, if you really believe that racial hierarchy bull shit you aren't second to white men. You are 4th behind Asians and Latinos.
    But stop giving a fuck what 'they' think. You only need to find one man. But if you do find a man of any color who is a good guy and finds you attractive and wants to bump ugliest with you he will be turned off by hour chronic whininess and crushing self hatred. Happiness doesn't come from a relationship. Happiness is something you bring to a relationship! [/quote

    Fourth??? Black men are second place
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 26, 2015 11:55 PM GMT
    Matthew 56, you are not ugly and you are not bad looking!

    You look like Fifty Cent and personally I think that he is sexy and you seem much him.

    50-Cent1.jpg

    The only thing ugly about you is your low self-esteem.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 12:00 AM GMT
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    ........
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 12:03 AM GMT
    Have you tired not being black?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 12:04 AM GMT
    you dont know what ugly is lol
    I understand you must be feeling down and have low self esteem atm. go out with some good friends, try to loosen up, who knows maybe someone good looking will hit on you and change your mind.but I think you should work on loving yourself instead of feeding on the need of others making you feel that way
    I´m not trying to diminish your feelings, these are important,you are important but there are WAY worse situations...
    work on your feelings, this is not something for a forum debate, there´s little to no perspective/insight to be given by anyone but yourself on this matter

    stop thinking on faggatory childish/immature standards lol
    blacks are in a place? god I´m glad I dont parley with such people...
  • collegedude12

    Posts: 75

    May 27, 2015 12:13 AM GMT
    like other guys said you are your own worst problem. people are attracted to confidence so dont put yourself down. a great personality can even make the mostly physically unattractive people look pretty damn hot so i'd say start there. and in all seriousness, maybe seeing a therapist wouldn't be such a bad idea
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 12:24 AM GMT
    You make no sense at all. You complain that you are ugly and get no attention, because you are black, yet a few weeks ago you started a thread whining about some guy who is into black dudes messaging you, saying that you felt offended.
  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 27, 2015 5:37 AM GMT
    James_Thunder_Early saidYou make no sense at all. You complain that you are ugly and get no attention, because you are black, yet a few weeks ago you started a thread whining about some guy who is into black dudes messaging you, saying that you felt offended.


    And that is just as worse being treated like a sexual fetish
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 3:05 PM GMT
    Why do you guys insist on feeding the troll?
  • Matthew56

    Posts: 392

    May 27, 2015 8:06 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]UndercoverMan said[/cite]Why do you guys insist on feeding the troll?[/quote

    I am not trolling this is how I feel sometimes
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2015 9:04 PM GMT
    Matthew56 said[quote][cite]UndercoverMan said[/cite]Why do you guys insist on feeding the troll?[/quote

    I am not trolling this is how I feel sometimes


    It's how you feel ALL the time! You're annoying.

    The truth of the matter is you aren't very attractive and it has nothing to do with your blackness. You'd be unattractive it you were Caucasian, Asian, or Martian. Guess what? THE VAST MAJORITY OF PEOPLE ARE NOT VERY ATTRACTIVE. GET OVER YOURSELF ALREADY.

    You will never be a gay heartthrob. You will never be an underwear model (or model of any sort). You won't be the next Hollywood leading man (unless you're super talented and then still your chances are still slim to none). Guess what? THE VAST MAJORITY OF GAY MEN WILL NEVER BE ANY OF THOSE THINGS EITHER.

    You are going to have to focus on other aspects of life other than appearance or you will never be attractive.

    Cultivate a kind, considerate, caring, compassionate personality. Be friendly, outgoing and gregarious. Those are the traits lacking in the gay world (straight too). It will get you noticed and someday you will meet a guy who appreciates those attributes.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14336

    May 27, 2015 9:37 PM GMT
    Matthew56 said[quote][cite]UndercoverMan said[/cite]Why do you guys insist on feeding the troll?[/quote

    I am not trolling this is how I feel sometimes
    You are being too negative. It's depressing. This is why you are having an impossible time attracting guys. You are very depressing.