Loving yourself is too fucking hard

  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 10, 2015 3:16 PM GMT
    I hate to say this, but it is. I don't know how so many of you do it.

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    Jun 10, 2015 6:26 PM GMT
    It's a lot easier to do than hating yourself. And more fun. icon_wink.gif
  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Jun 10, 2015 6:28 PM GMT
    Sounds like some counseling may be helpful for you. Either that, or do some charity work so that you can focus more on others.
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    Jun 10, 2015 6:32 PM GMT
    "Here I am world this is what you got" is my mentality, makes me chuckle too when I feel a little down icon_lol.gif
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 1031

    Jun 10, 2015 8:42 PM GMT
    If you don't love yourself, who will?
  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Jun 10, 2015 8:57 PM GMT
    anthonybg saidIt's all about self-acceptance. If you accept yourself for who you are you'll start seeing the good sides of your character. Otherwise, you'll only see the disadvantages. Do something that will make you proud, challenge yourself with something and when you see the results, you'll certainly start noticing the positive impact it has on you. Then, you'll be satisfied with the result and thus, more open to yourself. It's like a fight between your mind and your true self. If you persuade yourself you're capable of handling the truth, you'll be able to love yourself, too.


    Ok, I will admit that you do seem to be very mature for your age. But still, please be careful and don't rush to grow up. Enjoy your teenage years for what they are. You only have them once.
  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Jun 10, 2015 9:03 PM GMT
    Maybe this one as well...

  • bobbobbob

    Posts: 2812

    Jun 10, 2015 9:06 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidIt's a lot easier to do than hating yourself. And more fun. icon_wink.gif


    ^^^^^^^
    DAMN STRAIGHT. and people like you better.

    There used to be a guy here who wore the t-shirts with the same words on them to the bar every time he came out to the bars.

    If you are not the person YOU want to spend the rest of your life with how the hell do you expect to find anyone else to do it for you?
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    Jun 10, 2015 9:36 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat saidI hate to say this, but it is. I don't know how so many of you do it.



    I'm right there with you on that.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 10, 2015 9:47 PM GMT
    metta8 said do some charity work so that you can focus more on others.


    this is the thing. i am so sick of focussing on myself and being so critical of myself. im so self centred and thats partly my biggest problem. and i dont want to be. its such a horrible complex thing i seem to be going through.
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    Jun 10, 2015 9:51 PM GMT
    photo rupaul_zpsjqbnzxd6.gif
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    Jun 10, 2015 10:00 PM GMT
    metta8 saidSounds like some counseling may be helpful for you. Either that, or do some charity work so that you can focus more on others.


    This. Entirely.
  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Jun 10, 2015 10:07 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat said
    metta8 said do some charity work so that you can focus more on others.


    this is the thing. i am so sick of focussing on myself and being so critical of myself. im so self centred and thats partly my biggest problem. and i dont want to be. its such a horrible complex thing i seem to be going through.



    Well then, consider doing some charity work to help others. Meditation can also be useful in helping to rest your mind. The negative thoughts are obviously not helping you. Learn to just acknowledge them as they arise and then let them go.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 10, 2015 10:16 PM GMT
    PhoenixNYC saidphoto rupaul_zpsjqbnzxd6.gif


    i want to love myself and let that be enough
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    Jun 10, 2015 10:33 PM GMT
    anthonybg said...

    My teenage years are one HUGE failure...

    But it's not about me... It's the OP's topic, right?
    Without failure, there would be no reward for success.
    Air travel, space travel, self-driving cars...they all started with failures. icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 10, 2015 11:04 PM GMT
    stand up in front of a mirror and jerk off!
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    Jun 10, 2015 11:08 PM GMT
    David666k saidstand up in front of a mirror and jerk off!
    I do that every day; and you would too if you looked like me. icon_twisted.gif
  • bobbobbob

    Posts: 2812

    Jun 11, 2015 12:17 AM GMT
    anthonybg saidMy teenage years are one HUGE failure...

    But it's not about me... It's the OP's topic, right?


    Failure? Are you talking about those things that happen until you figure out a problem or accomplish something? I Love them.

    You're a perfectly normal hormonally egocentric insane teen.

    Jerk off four times a day, play video games, sigh a lot, mope, whine, complain, annoy your parents and it'll all be over in a few years... either you'll outgrow it or your parents will sell you to pirates.
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    Jun 11, 2015 12:39 AM GMT
    Just start with trying to tolerate yourself, then graduate to liking,, and who knows, maybe one day you'll learn what true love is all about.
    Put one foot in front of the other.
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    Jun 11, 2015 12:40 AM GMT
    hard...fucking.....loving? Like this?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 11, 2015 1:08 AM GMT
    love your self; it snow balls and others love you too and you love your self more.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 11, 2015 11:03 AM GMT
    how. how did you guys figure it out.
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    Jun 11, 2015 2:11 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat saidhow. how did you guys figure it out.


    I quit judging myself by other people's standards and comparing myself to others. There will always be someone younger, hotter, better hung, with a killer body who makes more money than I do...and there's nothing I can do about it (and there's always someone who is better than him, too...). I can't hate myself because I'm not that guy. I can only judge myself by what is right for me...am I being authentic? Am I working to improve myself? Am I doing something each day to make me a better person? Do I show compassion or am I being too self-centered? Am I a good friend, family member, or partner? If I answer "no" to any of these questions, then I need to work on them (plus others). I don't judge myself for falling short of my ideals but instead find ways to improve. As long as I am working towards a goal or goals, I feel okay about myself. If I slide, I know it's time to pick myself up and start working again. I make a lot of mistakes. I'm imperfect. I could have a whole host of reasons to hate myself, but where does that get me? As soon as I start hearing the negative voices in my head, I have to switch them to something positive.

    It's not easy, but at the end of the day, you only have you. Do you want to spend your brief time on earth hating yourself, or do you want to spend it productively?
  • newtosyr

    Posts: 40

    Jun 11, 2015 8:19 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidIt's a lot easier to do than hating yourself. And more fun. icon_wink.gif


    Words to live by paulflexes! I'm still learning how true that is. I know that I've been harder on myself than others! But that is more...while I may not completely like everything I do, I cannot help but love myself for trying.

    There is a difference between loving yourself and being narcissistic, but if you fail to appreciate and love yourself, you can't possibly offer it to others.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 11, 2015 9:38 PM GMT
    PhoenixNYC said
    ZakSayWhat saidhow. how did you guys figure it out.


    I quit judging myself by other people's standards and comparing myself to others. There will always be someone younger, hotter, better hung, with a killer body who makes more money than I do...and there's nothing I can do about it (and there's always someone who is better than him, too...). I can't hate myself because I'm not that guy. I can only judge myself by what is right for me...am I being authentic? Am I working to improve myself? Am I doing something each day to make me a better person? Do I show compassion or am I being too self-centered? Am I a good friend, family member, or partner? If I answer "no" to any of these questions, then I need to work on them (plus others). I don't judge myself for falling short of my ideals but instead find ways to improve. As long as I am working towards a goal or goals, I feel okay about myself. If I slide, I know it's time to pick myself up and start working again. I make a lot of mistakes. I'm imperfect. I could have a whole host of reasons to hate myself, but where does that get me? As soon as I start hearing the negative voices in my head, I have to switch them to something positive.

    It's not easy, but at the end of the day, you only have you. Do you want to spend your brief time on earth hating yourself, or do you want to spend it productively?


    live authentically. thats what i want

    i like that. im a good friend and i try to be a good family member