I had the most hilarious grindr experience

  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 11, 2015 9:49 PM GMT
    So, I was talking to this guy. He had no pics etc and he was telling me his fantasies which involved me being blindfolded and fucked fifty shades style, ice cubes candle wax etc and in my moment of thirst and enticed by how dangerous it all sounded i let him come over. he assured me he was handsome and played rugby and had a decent body, so i blindfolded myself and let him in.

    anyway he walks in and i felt his stomach before anything else. i let him strip me and then he sat and broke my bed. i was thinking omg thank god he broke my bed because i don't think i could have let him inside me.

    i mean it doesn;t sound hilarious, i have to sleep on a broken bed now but in hindsight im just finding it funny
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    Jun 11, 2015 10:02 PM GMT
    How does a guy break your bed just by sitting on it? Did he weigh over 500 pounds (36 stone/227kg)?
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Jun 11, 2015 10:03 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat saidi was thinking omg thank god he broke my bed because i don't think i could have let him inside me.


    damn! His dick was that big, eh?!
  • Svnw688

    Posts: 3350

    Jun 11, 2015 10:07 PM GMT
    Umm, I'd consider this a positive outcome. You could have been robbed, or worse.

    Look, hooking up is dangerous no matter how you do it. But literally being blindfolded when a complete stranger comes into your house who you have never seen before? I mean, do what you want, but you need to realize there are very bad people out there who WILL rob or hurt you and not think twice.

    Here's a recent example of a guy who posted to Craigslist, and got killed in a HOTEL room, which is much more public than your house/apt. BE CAREFUL.

    http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/lawyer-killer-met-craigslist-ad-prosecutors-article-1.2171817

    This happens ALL THE TIME in the robbery sense, and happens not infrequently in the violent sense. Deaths are rarer, but still happen every few months.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 11, 2015 10:13 PM GMT
    Svnw688 saidUmm, I'd consider this a positive outcome. You could have been robbed, or worse.

    Look, hooking up is dangerous no matter how you do it. But literally being blindfolded when a complete stranger comes into your house who you have never seen before? I mean, do what you want, but you need to realize there are very bad people out there who WILL rob or hurt you and not think twice.

    Here's a recent example of a guy who posted to Craigslist, and got killed in a HOTEL room, which is much more public than your house/apt. BE CAREFUL.

    http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/lawyer-killer-met-craigslist-ad-prosecutors-article-1.2171817

    This happens ALL THE TIME in the robbery sense, and happens not infrequently in the violent sense. Deaths are rarer, but still happen every few months.


    i know i know. im legit insane i think.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 11, 2015 10:15 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidHow does a guy break your bed just by sitting on it? Did he weigh over 500 pounds (36 stone/227kg)?


    like i dunno. he didn't feel 500 punds probably about 250 to 300 im 180 i think
  • venue35

    Posts: 4644

    Jun 11, 2015 11:47 PM GMT
    That's why blind folds are a no-no.
    You had Jabba the Hut over instead of some hot guy
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 12, 2015 3:33 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat said


    i know i know. im legit insane i think.


    No argument from me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 12, 2015 3:41 PM GMT
    You stuuupid
    Most Rugby players are XXL and no mach for you princess canopy trundle...

    you should set up a false entryway with a glory hole.
    --know a guy that had real suck-sess with his.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 12, 2015 4:33 PM GMT
    dustin_K_tx saidYou stuuupid
    Most Rugby players are XXL and no mach for you princess canopy trundle...

    you should set up a false entryway with a glory hole.
    --know a guy that had real suck-sess with his.


    ok but my landlord won't let me
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 12, 2015 4:44 PM GMT
    So you never took the blindfold off even after the bed broke? Are you still blindfolded?
  • metta

    Posts: 39090

    Jun 12, 2015 4:48 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat saidSo, I was talking to this guy. He had no pics etc and he was telling me his fantasies which involved me being blindfolded and fucked fifty shades style, ice cubes candle wax etc and in my moment of thirst and enticed by how dangerous it all sounded i let him come over. he assured me he was handsome and played rugby and had a decent body, so i blindfolded myself and let him in.

    anyway he walks in and i felt his stomach before anything else. i let him strip me and then he sat and broke my bed. i was thinking omg thank god he broke my bed because i don't think i could have let him inside me.

    i mean it doesn;t sound hilarious, i have to sleep on a broken bed now but in hindsight im just finding it funny


    Seriously, you need counseling. You are endangering yourself.
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 12, 2015 4:50 PM GMT
    DefensiveEnd saidSo you never took the blindfold off even after the bed broke? Are you still blindfolded?


    he asked me not to take the blindfold off until he left and i didn't want to because i didn't want to see his ugly face lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 12, 2015 4:52 PM GMT
    So you never even saw what the guy looked like at all? icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gif
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 12, 2015 4:53 PM GMT
    no lol

    im such a lana del rey
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    Jun 12, 2015 5:00 PM GMT
    DUMB and Dangerous.... congratulations on being blindfolded, having Jabba-the-slut come over , break your bed and molest you.... hysterical, a fucking riot...WTF? and the finale was what?...testing your homemade wax wings from the top of a skyscraper?...FAIL!icon_rolleyes.gif
  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 12, 2015 5:06 PM GMT
    Sporty_G saidDUMB and Dangerous.... congratulations on being blindfolded, having Jabba-the-slut come over , break your bed and molest you.... hysterical, a fucking riot...WTF? and the finale was what?...testing your homemade wax wings from the top of a skyscraper?...FAIL!icon_rolleyes.gif


    he probably looked like you tbh
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    Jun 12, 2015 5:27 PM GMT
    ZakSayWhat said
    Sporty_G saidDUMB and Dangerous.... congratulations on being blindfolded, having Jabba-the-slut come over , break your bed and molest you.... hysterical, a fucking riot...WTF? and the finale was what?...testing your homemade wax wings from the top of a skyscraper?...FAIL!icon_rolleyes.gif


    he probably looked like you tbh



    Zak, you posted your pathetic little fable to get attention. And if it did happen -- and you're indeed as much of an idiot as the story makes you out to be -- then you'd better expect replies like the one from Sporty-G. You need to get your ass off this site and into a psychiatrist's office ASAP. Go now. Don't wait. Go.

  • ZakSayWhat

    Posts: 573

    Jun 12, 2015 5:42 PM GMT
    David_Lauderdale said
    ZakSayWhat said
    Sporty_G saidDUMB and Dangerous.... congratulations on being blindfolded, having Jabba-the-slut come over , break your bed and molest you.... hysterical, a fucking riot...WTF? and the finale was what?...testing your homemade wax wings from the top of a skyscraper?...FAIL!icon_rolleyes.gif


    he probably looked like you tbh



    Zak, you posted your pathetic little fable to get attention. And if it did happen -- and you're indeed as much of an idiot as the story makes you out to be -- then you'd better expect replies like the one from Sporty-G. You need to get your ass off this site and into a psychiatrist's office ASAP. Go now. Don't wait. Go.



    ok it wasn't a fable. its truth.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 12, 2015 5:48 PM GMT
    Sporty_G saidDUMB and Dangerous.... congratulations on being blindfolded, having Jabba-the-slut come over , break your bed and molest you.... hysterical, a fucking riot...WTF? and the finale was what?...testing your homemade wax wings from the top of a skyscraper?...FAIL!icon_rolleyes.gif

    Now let's not get carried away with the Jabba the Hut thing. I've broken a bed. You don't have to be 500 pounds.