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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2015 7:04 PM GMT
    post regret icon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 08, 2015 9:30 AM GMT
    I was a 29-year-old virgin for a few months, then had sex for the first time in my life last year. Before that I knew I wanted it badly, but the desire to keep my virginity for the first mutual lover was just much stronger. Eventually I thought nah that's not gonna happen easily and I'd like to know what sex was like before turning 30. I discussed this with my best (straight) friend, got my mindset adjusted, and opened myself up to the possibility. A couple of months later I dated a very nice guy. We got along so well that I could bring the topic of my virginity into the conversation. I felt he could be trusted for a few reasons, including that we're both academics at the same university. At one point I asked whether we could 'experiment'.

    He objected. icon_biggrin.gif But then we moved ourselves from the dating venue to his house. More conversations eventually led to the touching of the hands and gradually other body parts. His kiss was even the first kiss of my life! Finally we ended up on his bed. I did every single thing I ever fancied doing to a man. I didn't try being fucked though as my hole was just too tight. icon_redface.gif

    So basically what worked for me was finding a way to keep my mind open and ready and when a nice, trustable guy turned up just 'let it go let it go can't hold it back anymore'. Let the storm rage on!
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 875

    Jul 12, 2015 5:23 AM GMT
    Being a virgin at the age of 29 is not nearly as unusual as most people/media would want you to believe. Nope, this ain't the default. No one would really expect it but, yeah, it is not entirely unheard of. We have heard of stranger stories on these boards and elsewhereicon_biggrin.gif

    The problem you are wrestling with is most likely two-fold.

    First off, you have fallen for the trappings of the popular culture that relentlessly keeps on repeating how 'you' - the individual is at very the center of the universe. Just by being you (meaning really, a consumer) you are entitled to all sorts of amazing experiences, such as heavenly romances, perfect life, eternal happiness, etc. (Remember, if you are not happy with anything, you can write to your senator! Wow!) No wonder that a number of people fall for this and start living in an unreal world of sky high expectations, unfounded hopes, and bottomless disappointments.

    Shake this attitude off. You are one of the millions of equally endowed consumers chasing a dream that will never become a reality. Perfect romances or perfect anyone or anything are not meant for the humans. They are the sole domain of marketing fantasy.

    Life passes while you are going through your propaganda induced slumber.

    Second off, you have had one negative alcohol induced experience. As you rightly say, this experience is now seared in your mind. And it is preventing you from connecting with other people sexually.

    Understand that while sexual desire may be a hormonally driven phenomenon, the techniques of any specific sexual intercourse do not come naturally to all the people. They are learned over the time, and are results of the accumulated experience.

    The porn industry, the media, and many other people would want you to believe that every first sexual experience was nothing short of an earth-shaking, stellar experience.

    Well, you have been lied to. Big time at that!

    For many people out there their first sexual experience was a mix of being clumsy, inexperienced, not knowing what to do exactly, being too drunk, too scared, getting no erection, or getting one, and cumming in 3 minutes flat if they were lucky.

    Now, you do not expect the guys to be perfectly honest about it, do you? There you meet your friends for the drinks at the neighborhood bar, and a dude starts bragging about how he has just lost his virgin card, and how he was clueless, his partner was clueless, too; both were totally clumsy, possibly drunk, and it all ended up being a perfectly shitty evening?

    What are the chances that the dude who advertises his lack of knowledge and skills will score again? The opposite is true, too. So, if a dude spins out a major fairy tail, everybody looks at him in awe, and the general assumption is that newly created sex god is more than likely to score endlessly, while the losers are nursing their drinks, and are far too scared to even contemplate any action.

    Part with your fantasies, and start living a real life!

    SC
  • Pete36

    Posts: 69

    Jul 25, 2015 1:21 AM GMT
    I was a virgin until I was 24 and 4 months.....its work the
    waite