First dates, they are all looking for sex

  • Pete36

    Posts: 69

    Jul 09, 2015 6:25 AM GMT
    is it me or what but all the guys I go out with are looking for sex on the first date. Am I a prude or just not up with the dating seen.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 09, 2015 6:32 AM GMT
    Well, I suppose if all you are showing them is those adult photos you have in your profile ... why would you expect anything else?
  • Coast

    Posts: 24

    Jul 09, 2015 8:09 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidWell, I suppose if all you are showing them is those adult photos you have in your profile ... why would you expect anything else?


    +1

    And it's "scene" icon_lol.gif
  • Zigs_01

    Posts: 226

    Jul 10, 2015 10:51 AM GMT
    Promiscuity is the downfall of being gay in the community. Numerous amount of people are simply looking for hook ups. Unsurprisingly, gay people are most likely to have numerous sleeping partners. I image if people wait at least three months before even kissing or having sex, the ability for a long term relationship would have increase like hood of succeeding. Anybody who is looking for a long term relationship chances would be diminished.

  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 871

    Jul 10, 2015 1:28 PM GMT
    Zigs_01 saidPromiscuity is the downfall of being gay in the community. Numerous amount of people are simply looking for hook ups. Unsurprisingly, gay people are most likely to have numerous sleeping partners. I image if people wait at least three months before even kissing or having sex, the ability for a long term relationship would have increase like hood of succeeding. Anybody who is looking for a long term relationship chances would be diminished.



    Nope.

    Promiscuity has been a big part of gay life(style) from the very beginning. And, thanks for asking, we are still around and going pretty strongicon_lol.gif

    Not everyone is the same. If you are a sexually positive person, and recognize that sexuality is a big part of who you are, waiting for months before you have sex with someone whom you are dating is simply not an option. You are investing time, energy, emotions, money, etc., into something that may or may not work. Frankly, going down this lane is calling for a failure to happen.

    If you happen to be an essentially sexually negative person, you may want to connect with a similar guy, and wait long and hard before anything sexual happens. It won't carry too much weight anyway. And it probably won't matter anyway, because you have connected on other levels in the meantime.

    Whoever you may be, suggesting that promiscuity among men is something wrong and undesirable won't find any acceptance with the majority of gay men out there.

    SC

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 10, 2015 1:57 PM GMT
    the OP is 39.9 and its time he start looking for that husband. At least I know the feeling.

    enjoy the sex on the first date, date more than one person at a time. Be honest with everyone what you are doing. You could possibly find that man if you two ignore enjoy the sex.

  • FRE0

    Posts: 4862

    Jul 10, 2015 7:33 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidWell, I suppose if all you are showing them is those adult photos you have in your profile ... why would you expect anything else?


    Especially considering that he has nothing else in his profile, i.e., nothing about his interests, education, location, etc., so what else could he expect?
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4862

    Jul 10, 2015 7:34 PM GMT
    Zigs_01 saidPromiscuity is the downfall of being gay in the community. Numerous amount of people are simply looking for hook ups. Unsurprisingly, gay people are most likely to have numerous sleeping partners. I image if people wait at least three months before even kissing or having sex, the ability for a long term relationship would have increase like hood of succeeding. Anybody who is looking for a long term relationship chances would be diminished.



    "Sleeping partners"? That would be an improvement. One hour encounters seem more common.
  • toybrian

    Posts: 395

    Jul 10, 2015 11:08 PM GMT
    It is not you and many do want it on the first date and condomless without knowing you.. Want to know the guy better before anything happens unless I know it is just a hook up and that is also with condom..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 10, 2015 11:35 PM GMT
    Use wholesome photos in your profile pics, e.g. hugging a golden retriever, helping out at a charity for underprivileged donkeys with cancer. That way you will come across as relationship material.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 11, 2015 1:37 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidWell, I suppose if all you are showing them is those adult photos you have in your profile ... why would you expect anything else?


    So true. "I know all my pictures are closeups of my crotch... but I'm really hoping to find a guy who cares about my stance on stem cell research...."
  • Zigs_01

    Posts: 226

    Jul 13, 2015 4:12 AM GMT
    SilverRRCloud said
    Zigs_01 saidPromiscuity is the downfall of being gay in the community. Numerous amount of people are simply looking for hook ups. Unsurprisingly, gay people are most likely to have numerous sleeping partners. I image if people wait at least three months before even kissing or having sex, the ability for a long term relationship would have increase like hood of succeeding. Anybody who is looking for a long term relationship chances would be diminished.



    Nope.

    Promiscuity has been a big part of gay life(style) from the very beginning. And, thanks for asking, we are still around and going pretty strongicon_lol.gif

    Not everyone is the same. If you are a sexually positive person, and recognize that sexuality is a big part of who you are, waiting for months before you have sex with someone whom you are dating is simply not an option. You are investing time, energy, emotions, money, etc., into something that may or may not work. Frankly, going down this lane is calling for a failure to happen.

    If you happen to be an essentially sexually negative person, you may want to connect with a similar guy, and wait long and hard before anything sexual happens. It won't carry too much weight anyway. And it probably won't matter anyway, because you have connected on other levels in the meantime.

    Whoever you may be, suggesting that promiscuity among men is something wrong and undesirable won't find any acceptance with the majority of gay men out there.

    SC



    Promiscuity is bad nevertheless. You guys can do it for all I care. I wouldn't do it though.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 21, 2015 12:42 AM GMT
    if they're looking for sex on the first date, they're just playing around or in their *slut phase. I'm dating a guy right now, we finally had sex after 5 dates. It's going well but yeah we're taking it slow. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 21, 2015 2:14 AM GMT
    Both of my long term relationships in my life started with sex on the first date. Sex is good. I'm looking for dates and potential relationships not hookups, but I'm open to sex on the first date if the chemistry is there and the logistics work. And if I guy I like would rather wait that's fine too.
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    Jul 21, 2015 2:21 AM GMT
    Wait...I thought sex was supposed to come before the first date. When did this change?
  • TheBaise

    Posts: 362

    Jul 21, 2015 2:39 AM GMT
    Ya gotta stick to the plan, man /
    1st date / 1st base. Holding hands, one kiss.
    2nd date / 2nd base. Deep kissing, petting above waist.
    3rd date / 3rd base. Oral, fondling, heavy making out.
    4th date / Home run. All the way / everything.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 22, 2015 5:46 PM GMT
    duluthrunner saidBoth of my long term relationships in my life started with sex on the first date. Sex is good. I'm looking for dates and potential relationships not hookups, but I'm open to sex on the first date if the chemistry is there and the logistics work. And if I guy I like would rather wait that's fine too.

    +1

    Do what you want. There is nothing wrong with sex. If there is chemistry between you, why not?

    If you want a relationship, don't have sex with a guy unless you really like him (as well as finding him hot).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 23, 2015 11:38 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidWait...I thought sex was supposed to come before the first date. When did this change?


    It has not changed. At least for me last night.icon_biggrin.gif