Meeting a guy - Got no one else to talk to!

  • PewPew

    Posts: 2

    Jul 11, 2015 7:43 PM GMT
    Hey everyone, I've been following RealJock for a while but I've never signed up until now. I don't really have anyone else to talk to on this, so I'm hoping to get some opinions. - Apologies if I ramble.

    So I've been chatting to this guy now for around a year, but more seriously for like 6 months. I'll admit I'm completely flipped over him. icon_rolleyes.gif The only thing is he's 15 years older than me (I'm 22) but I don't really mind the difference, he also has two kids - which isn't a problem either for me. He lives around three hours away in the next town and I've been meaning to see him. I think what I like about his is that he's very stable and is looking for a relationship. Which is exactly what I'm interested in right now.

    So I'm working with a great company who is sending me down for some work in a couple of days and It's near where he lives. I've been wanting to meet this guy for SO long and I've just been so busy with work and wrapping up my degree that I haven't gotten the chance. But now I can and we're totally going to do some cool things like go to dinner, shop and movies.

    I feel really guilty for liking someone as much as I do when I haven't met him. But it's like he's become apart of my everyday life. We've been Calling, texting and constantly sending pictures throughout the months. And I'm beginning to crush hard on him now.

    The only thing is I'm totally getting mixed messages from him and it's making me act crazy! So like one day he'll be like "You're so amazing, I can't wait to finally meet you." and things along the line of "How are you still single you're incredible." We can talk for hours and laugh and just act comfortable. AND then there's days where I feel like I have to always start the conversations or make them flow. I understand he's got kids (I practically raised my younger siblings with my parents on business trips) so trust me I know what it's like to lack time to reply and do tasks. So i suppose I can't really use that as an excuse. And then there's moments where he says things like "I'm sure you're going to find a great guy one of these days." which makes me think that he's not interested in me. It just feels like a major hot and cold situation.

    So when I do meet him (and assuming I do like him in reality) how would I let him know how I feel? I don't want to push anything, but I feel like I've known him forever and the fact that I've practically been engaging with him since last year makes me feel like we've got a great friendship. So I don't want to ruin that by confessing my major crush on him. Am I being crazy or should I just stop and revaluate when I see him?

    Please shoot some suggestions guys - seriously need them!!!
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 901

    Jul 12, 2015 4:46 AM GMT
    No one really knows the future. Try to remember this.

    Life mandates that you take one step at a time. Do not raise your hopes too high. Online chats, and phone calls, txts, etc., are one thing. Meeting a guy in person is usually something different.

    Take it nice, slow and easy. This guy may be all or almost all you have ever hoped him to be. Or he may be someone different. Remember that he is not here solely to be a part of your life plans. He, too, has his life to live.

    Serious LTRs are not found. They are built over the time. So, open your mind, give it a chance, and see where this takes you to.

    Judging by his hot/cold reactions, he also does not know what to really expect. Just like you, he has never met you, and he is only smart enough not to push his envelope too far before he meets you in real life.

    It helps to adopt a more proactive attitude in life. Sure, you AND everyone else have been busy. This is how things are. But the dude does not live on a different continent. A three-hour drive is not a trip around the world. It makes a lot of sense to invest the time and money, and hop into a car, and meet the dude in person, if you clicked this famously online, before talking online for months at a time, and working yourself up over it.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2015 4:58 AM GMT
    PewPew said"I'm sure you're going to find a great guy one of these days." which makes me think that he's not interested in me.

    Just let him know you really enjoy talking to him and you'd like to see where it goes.

    His comment makes me think he's trying not to get his hopes up.