Nervous about topping for the first time!! :(

  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 12, 2015 4:50 PM GMT
    hey whatsup everyone I just joined and this is my first post. So I've been talking to this guy on grindr and we want to meet each other and hangout soon and the sexual tension between us has been insane omg I can't wait to meet him. He's so sexy and hot and he's BEAUTIFUL. I've never met him but I already like him A LOT and it goes beyond just sexual attraction and I'm really hoping that eventually we can become a couple.

    I'm 20 and he's 28. He's a bottom and he says that he wants me to fuck him. I'm so nervous because I've only had sex with one other person, my ex boyfriend and he always fucked me. The guy I've been talking to is more experienced than I am and I've never fucked a guy before and I'm really nervous about pleasing him and making him feel good.

    I told him I've only had sex with one other person and that I've never fucked another guy and he was fine with that. I told him that I want to try everything with him but I haven't told him about how nervous I am because I think he would think that's unattractive.

    He's also a lot more attractive and sexier than I am. He's a 10 and I'm like a negative 10 in terms of appearance. He's got like the perfect jock body and he looks like a Versace model and I honestly can't even believe that he wants to talk to me so I'm insecure about that too.

    Can someone please give me some tips or anything on topping for the first time?? Thanks!
  • PRDGUY

    Posts: 641

    Jul 12, 2015 5:13 PM GMT
    To start things off have him ride your cock... then let him suggest positions that work for him...
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    Jul 12, 2015 6:18 PM GMT
    2 bottoms hooking up, cute.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2015 7:07 PM GMT
    You haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!
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    Jul 12, 2015 8:37 PM GMT
    Bottoms make incredible tops.
    icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2015 8:40 PM GMT
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Good tips to go by
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2015 11:00 PM GMT
    I get nervous about topping too, especially if the cake was bought at Walmart.
  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    Jul 13, 2015 12:32 AM GMT
    Lose your low esteem attitudes before you fuck him for the first, and the last time...
  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    Jul 13, 2015 12:34 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidI get nervous about topping too, especially if the cake was bought at Walmart.
    Stop buying shit in the dented can isle...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 13, 2015 12:38 AM GMT
    Seriously dude….you'll be surprised at how enjoyable it is being a top or versatile. It's an experience you won't forget! icon_biggrin.gif
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 13, 2015 12:21 PM GMT
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 13, 2015 12:24 PM GMT
    mybud saidLose your low esteem attitudes before you fuck him for the first, and the last time...


    That's what's I'm nervous about omg what if I can't get hard because I'm so nervous or I cum too early lol? ASDFGHJKL he's so hot that I'm scared I'm gonna cum when we make out (that's never happened to me) and he's never gonna wanna talk to me again wow I have so much anxiety over this I gotta relax
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 13, 2015 12:25 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidI get nervous about topping too, especially if the cake was bought at Walmart.


    I don't get it lol?????
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    Jul 13, 2015 1:21 PM GMT
    NYC_BOI said
    mybud saidLose your low esteem attitudes before you fuck him for the first, and the last time...


    That's what's I'm nervous about omg what if I can't get hard because I'm so nervous or I cum too early lol? ASDFGHJKL he's so hot that I'm scared I'm gonna cum when we make out (that's never happened to me) and he's never gonna wanna talk to me again wow I have so much anxiety over this I gotta relax


    He will take it as a compliment if you do.
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    Jul 13, 2015 2:26 PM GMT
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 13, 2015 2:36 PM GMT
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.


    But don't condoms make sex a lot less enjoyable???? When we first started dating my ex told me that he doesn't like to wear condoms because they remove the sensation when you're having sex and he said that condoms hurt your dick
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 13, 2015 7:23 PM GMT
    NYC_BOI said
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.


    But don't condoms make sex a lot less enjoyable???? When we first started dating my ex told me that he doesn't like to wear condoms because they remove the sensation when you're having sex and he said that condoms hurt your dick


    It seems risky. Here's a easy to follow guideline.

    There are now at least five strategies that reasonably constitute ‘safe sex’, provided that certain parameters are met.
    They are:
    1.The use of Condoms during casual encounters between men of unknown or discordant serostatus.
    2.HIV negative men taking effective pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP).
    3.Men living with HIV who only have sex without condoms when they have a sustained undetectable viral load (UVL) and in the absence of sexually transmissible infections (STIs).
    4.Effective use of serosorting between HIV positive men.
    5.Effective negotiated safety agreements.

    http://www.acon.org.au/sites/default/files/What-is-Safe-Sex-Position-2014.pdf

    David doesn't 'always wear a condom', he just impregnated a girl. But he's supposedly in a monogamous relationship and they were both tested several times, together.

    BOI, you need to cool your jets. You aren't thinking.....and you haven't even met! You need to take HIV more seriously.
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    Jul 14, 2015 3:37 AM GMT
    NYC_BOI said
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.


    But don't condoms make sex a lot less enjoyable???? When we first started dating my ex told me that he doesn't like to wear condoms because they remove the sensation when you're having sex and he said that condoms hurt your dick

    OK go ahead, get fucked with no condoms, become the cliche of the gay guy with HIV.
    For your posts and your volatile personality I can tell you won't buy and take PrEP correctly either. And even if you did, a world of STD's awaits for you... enjoy the ride!
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 14, 2015 5:02 AM GMT
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.


    But don't condoms make sex a lot less enjoyable???? When we first started dating my ex told me that he doesn't like to wear condoms because they remove the sensation when you're having sex and he said that condoms hurt your dick

    OK go ahead, get fucked with no condoms, become the cliche of the gay guy with HIV.
    For your posts and your volatile personality I can tell you won't buy and take PrEP correctly either. And even if you did, a world of STD's awaits for you... enjoy the ride!


    mariah-carey-side-eye.gif?w=643&h=341
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 14, 2015 5:03 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    NYC_BOI said
    David666k said
    NYC_BOI said
    timmm55 saidYou haven't even met him. Don't put the cart before the horse.

    His '10' pics may not even be his own.

    Even if they are his pics the chemistry may be off.

    But if it all works out, a few suggestions.
    1) I'll assume you are 'young, dumb and full of cum.' Wear a condom if either of you are not on PrEP. Or do both.

    2) Hygiene! Rimming a nice clean ass is great! It'll get him worked up and you ready.

    3) Go slow. Don't poke and jab.

    4) Kiss and make your lips tell the story. If you can't kiss passion, how can the sex be passionate?

    5) Have fun!

    6) You've bottomed, do to him what works for you!


    Thanks!!!!! icon_smile.gif I don't wanna wear a condom tbh and I can trust him but I guess I should wear one. I just got tested for the first time and now I'm obsessed w safe sex.

    btw all the pics he sent me are his and he's fucking SEXY *eyes emoji* and so far the chemistry between us has been really good so I think and hope that we'll have good chemistry when we meet up

    Thanks!

    It doesnt matter if you trust him or not, he might be infected and doesn't know it. Always wear a condom.


    But don't condoms make sex a lot less enjoyable???? When we first started dating my ex told me that he doesn't like to wear condoms because they remove the sensation when you're having sex and he said that condoms hurt your dick


    It seems risky. Here's a easy to follow guideline.

    There are now at least five strategies that reasonably constitute ‘safe sex’, provided that certain parameters are met.
    They are:
    1.The use of Condoms during casual encounters between men of unknown or discordant serostatus.
    2.HIV negative men taking effective pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP).
    3.Men living with HIV who only have sex without condoms when they have a sustained undetectable viral load (UVL) and in the absence of sexually transmissible infections (STIs).
    4.Effective use of serosorting between HIV positive men.
    5.Effective negotiated safety agreements.

    http://www.acon.org.au/sites/default/files/What-is-Safe-Sex-Position-2014.pdf

    David doesn't 'always wear a condom', he just impregnated a girl. But he's supposedly in a monogamous relationship and they were both tested several times, together.

    BOI, you need to cool your jets. You aren't thinking.....and you haven't even met! You need to take HIV more seriously.


    I know omg I really do need to take hiv more srsly I need to be more careful and I've made some stupid decisions and this is so scary to say but with the stuff I've done I'm surprised I don't have an std
  • Buddha

    Posts: 1765

    Jul 15, 2015 12:34 AM GMT
    Be honest about your nervousity, take it easy, don't force the hard-on, if you get soft just take a little break and continue later if at all.

    Honestly when I'm topping, I don't think the difference is that great with/without condom. Sure it's better without, but the condom helps me relax during and afterwards that I probably don't have anything to worry about.

    Having that said, if it's your first time topping and nervous, getting the condom on might be a turn-off. You should try it at home first.

    I don't mean to belittle you or anything, but you seem to be crushing on this guy so hard that you'll probably do him without condoms if he asks you. I won't even bother to tell you why you shouldn't, because I'm pretty sure you've heard it all. Whatever you do, don't make excuses why you didn't use the condom. You were horny, that's it. None of the "it hurts, it's too small, there's less feeling" etc.


    Don't drink too much alcohol, but I like a little. Then again I always like to be drunk so that wasn't really any advice, that's just my neutral mode.
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    Jul 15, 2015 12:56 AM GMT
    You've only seen his photos? It seems people now think seeing each other on camera is a thing of the last decade (the glorious days of MSN...) Now we're back to the 90's... Show me your gif! icon_lol.gif
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 17, 2015 8:57 AM GMT
    bachian saidYou've only seen his photos? It seems people now think seeing each other on camera is a thing of the last decade (the glorious days of MSN...) Now we're back to the 90's... Show me your gif! icon_lol.gif


    We don't live close icon_sad.gif he lives in Philly and I'm in jersey and we live far apart so no I've never seen him in person yet but I can't wait to meet him omgggggggggg
  • NYC_BOI

    Posts: 80

    Jul 17, 2015 9:02 AM GMT
    Buddha saidBe honest about your nervousity, take it easy, don't force the hard-on, if you get soft just take a little break and continue later if at all.

    Honestly when I'm topping, I don't think the difference is that great with/without condom. Sure it's better without, but the condom helps me relax during and afterwards that I probably don't have anything to worry about.

    Having that said, if it's your first time topping and nervous, getting the condom on might be a turn-off. You should try it at home first.

    I don't mean to belittle you or anything, but you seem to be crushing on this guy so hard that you'll probably do him without condoms if he asks you. I won't even bother to tell you why you shouldn't, because I'm pretty sure you've heard it all. Whatever you do, don't make excuses why you didn't use the condom. You were horny, that's it. None of the "it hurts, it's too small, there's less feeling" etc.


    Don't drink too much alcohol, but I like a little. Then again I always like to be drunk so that wasn't really any advice, that's just my neutral mode.


    Thank youuuuuuuuuuu!!!! I'm gonna be careful with him and practice safe sex and wear a condom and stuff especially because um I just found out I have hsv-1 oral herpes and now I'm so neurotic and nervous about giving it to him and I would never wanna do that wow I wouldn't be able to live with myself but my doctor said that as long as I don't have cold sores I can't spread it to other men. But then I read that even if I don't have cold sores I still can so idk I gotta talk to my doctor and ask him again when I see him next week. Thanks!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2015 7:53 PM GMT
    You don't have to have cold sore to be contagious. Most people will have a tingling/pain on their lip before the bump and ensuing blister appear.
    From tingling to full healing you are contagious.