"Never Got To Say Goodbye"


  • Aug 11, 2015 6:07 PM GMT
    I never got to say goodbye.
    Or thank you for all the things you had done.
    For making me your world, your stars
    For wanting to call me your son.
    You brought me home, along with two
    Broken, neglected babes.
    The world told you "No, you shouldn't do that"
    But you kept us safe.
    My treatment went on for years
    The physical torment, muscles burning.
    Never once thanking you
    For investing in me, all your earnings.
    You held my hand, my champion
    When I was too scared to try.
    And I returned the favor
    By hiding when you were to die.
    I was worried about the smallest things
    Not having money, time or space.
    When I should have been more worried
    about seeing your bright face.
    For the longest time you fought for us
    From the time we became yours.
    But the saddest thing is I wasn't able to say goodbye
    When you went to be with your LORD.
    I have regrets when they are not worth
    For someone who chose me, not from birth
    A special gift, you were to me
    Why did it take so long to see?
    You waning hair never broke your spirit
    I saw the pain, but you could taste it, hear it.
    You held on for so long, not wanting to leave.
    Always because you loved us, all because you loved me.
    I wish I got to say goodbye
    I wish I could apologize.
    I wish that I could thank you, dear.
    For staying with me, so close and near.
    You guide me every step of the way.
    From year to year and day to day.
    Your love resounds like a angel choir.
    They are lucky enough to have you there.
    I missed my chance to say goodbye.
    I miss your hugs, laughter and lullabies.
    You made me into a better person.
    All because I was chosen.
    You were my champion, protector, friend.
    I wish I could have been there at the end.
    You did so much, I did none at all.
    But now every single time evening falls,
    I look to the stars and I see you
    And I hope you can see me too.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 8:16 PM GMT
    Did you write this touching tribute?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 8:26 PM GMT
    Damn man. Stop making me teary eyed at work.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 8:36 PM GMT
    I just read your profile and then reread the poem. Wow.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 8:38 PM GMT
    Very nice.

    Your mom sounds like someone who would have understood that we all handle what we can as we can.

    She must have known how frightening to you was her dying. In that there is no shame. With that redress regret.
  • metta

    Posts: 39104

    Aug 11, 2015 9:14 PM GMT
    Beautiful poem....hugs to you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 10:12 PM GMT
    DefensiveEnd saidI just read your profile and then reread the poem. Wow.
    +1

    Sorry to hear about your mom. The poem sums up the feeling perfectly!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 11, 2015 10:24 PM GMT
    I never got to say goodbye to my Mom, either. I knew she had gone to the hospital for an intestinal blockage problem. I spoke with her on the phone her first night there, in Hollywood, Florida, where our paulflexes lives. I was living at the Little Rock Air Force Base in Arkansas.

    The second night when I phoned I got the nurse. I had a premonition a few minutes earlier that something was wrong. I hadn't really planned to phone her, I thought she was supposed to phone me, or my sister or father, keeping me informed about what I was told was a minor medical issue. I didn't want to disturb Mom if she was sleeping. But suddenly I was compelled to phone.

    The nurse's speech was stumbling & halting, and after she determined who I was, she said: "I'm not really supposed to say this over the phone, Robert, but I'm sorry to tell you your mother just died about 15 minutes ago." The nurse said they thought she'd had a heart attack, at 75, which was later established as the cause. She died alone in her hospital room. It still upsets me to think about it. So I can empathize with some of these emotions.

  • Aug 11, 2015 11:18 PM GMT
    DOMINUS saidDid you write this touching tribute?


    Yes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 1:56 AM GMT
    Yes.
    Thank you

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 3:18 AM GMT
    icon_cry.gif ...for whom may i ask? icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 4:17 AM GMT
    hairyandym saidicon_cry.gif ...for whom may i ask? icon_cry.gif
    Read his profile.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 4:47 AM GMT
    Beautifully written, lots of love from Ottawa man icon_smile.gif
  • Aspruhaa

    Posts: 4

    Aug 12, 2015 7:02 AM GMT
    Damn it, the ninjas are cutting onions in the air again.

    I'm so sorry about your mother. This was truly touching.
  • mar0302

    Posts: 273

    Aug 12, 2015 8:56 AM GMT
    Well written... I'm sorry about your loss.. Forgive yourself, your mum would.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 12:02 PM GMT
    johnnytheginger said
    DOMINUS saidDid you write this touching tribute?


    Yes.


    I looked up the definition of "courage" in the dictionary this morning and I saw your picture beside it. All the very best to you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 12, 2015 4:36 PM GMT
    This is a truly fine tribute you've written. I'd like to have had the talent to write a similar one for my grandparents (who raised me). Your mom was obviously a terrific lady. You're a terrific son.