Flamboyancy level and dating

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    Oct 16, 2015 7:16 PM GMT
    I had an interesting observation that I arrived at when I was trying to figure out why suddenly I'm not that interested in the guy I'm currently seeing.

    I've noticed that most gay couples tend to date within their same level of flamboyance. That somewhat explains to me the whole "masc looking for the same" mentality that I see on dating sites. How often have you seen a masculine guy date a really out there guy?

    For me, I can't date anyone gayer than myself. I'm not 100% masculine yet I'm not feminine either. The best way I can explain it is how a lot of Asians (not born in the US) are sometimes perceived as feminine when they are straight because of their mannerisms, which are totally attributable to their cultural norms. This partly explains to me why I'm usually attracted to Asian guys.

    Has anyone else noticed this? Or maybe you have some stories that prove this observation wrong? I'm thinking the majority of couples are within the same level of flamboyance.
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    Oct 16, 2015 7:28 PM GMT
    swimjammer said
    I've noticed that most gay couples tend to date within their same level of flamboyance. .

    ^ Not true. Your theory would be the perfect solution for all the fem bottoms out there, but sadly fem are not into other fem but into masculine men. And only a few masc are into fem.


    swimjammer said
    a lot of Asians (not born in the US) are sometimes perceived as feminine when they are straight because of their mannerisms, which are totally attributable to their cultural norms.

    ^ This is so true though, but has nothing to do you with previous theory, quite the opposite, asian men are notorious for NOT dating other asian men.
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    Oct 16, 2015 7:35 PM GMT
    It's a very worn out line we've all read and heard a million times, but the truth in it still rings true: "If I wanted a woman, I'd get one." What's the point in being homosexual if you're after femininity?

    From my observations, the guys who tend to go for fem guys are usually the ones who are not comfortable being gay, so they go for trannies or super fem guys to make themselves feel more manly. And considering how many trannies we have here where I live I've gotten to observe this phenomenon many many times. I'm not saying this is always the case, but in the vast majority of cases this has proven to be true.
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    Oct 16, 2015 7:53 PM GMT
    Radd saidIt's a very worn out line we've all read and hear a million times, but the truth in it still rings true: "If I wanted a woman, I'd get one." What's the point in being homosexual if you're after femininity?

    Being gay doesn't necessarily mean you have to be attracted to masculinity only. As I always say things are not just black or white, a fem guy can be really sexy if you're into that, though I reckon most gay men are not into that!


    Radd said
    From my observations, the guys who tend to go for fem guys are usually the ones who are not comfortable being gay, so they go for trannies or super fem guys to make themselves feel more manly. And considering how many trannies we have here where I live I've gotten to observe this phenomenon many many times. I'm not saying this is always the case, but in the vast majority of cases this has proven to be true.

    But what if someone is just not that attracted to masculine traits like beards or dicks? I dont think that means the guy is not comfortable being gay but more like he just have other preferences among the big gay spectrum.
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    Oct 16, 2015 8:07 PM GMT
    David666k said
    swimjammer said
    I've noticed that most gay couples tend to date within their same level of flamboyance. .

    ^ Not true. Your theory would be the perfect solution for all the fem bottoms out there, but sadly fem are not into other fem but into masculine men. And only a few masc are into fem.


    swimjammer said
    a lot of Asians (not born in the US) are sometimes perceived as feminine when they are straight because of their mannerisms, which are totally attributable to their cultural norms.

    ^ This is so true though, but has nothing to do you with previous theory, quite the opposite, asian men are notorious for NOT dating other asian men.

    The mention of Asians was merely my attempt to describe the types of mannerisms that I'm comfortable with.
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    Oct 16, 2015 8:18 PM GMT
    ^ OK but if you're fem chances are other fems wont be attracted to you, specially if they're asians as they're usually not attracted to other asians. You my friend are the exception to the rule.
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    Oct 16, 2015 8:22 PM GMT
    David666k said
    Radd saidIt's a very worn out line we've all read and hear a million times, but the truth in it still rings true: "If I wanted a woman, I'd get one." What's the point in being homosexual if you're after femininity?

    Being gay doesn't necessarily mean you have to be attracted to masculinity only. As I always say things are not just black or white, a fem guy can be really sexy if you're into that, though I reckon most gay men are not into that!


    Radd said
    From my observations, the guys who tend to go for fem guys are usually the ones who are not comfortable being gay, so they go for trannies or super fem guys to make themselves feel more manly. And considering how many trannies we have here where I live I've gotten to observe this phenomenon many many times. I'm not saying this is always the case, but in the vast majority of cases this has proven to be true.

    But what if someone is just not that attracted to masculine traits like beards or dicks? I dont think that means the guy is not comfortable being gay but more like he just have other preferences among the big gay spectrum.




    Well, that's why I said "from my observations" and "usually." I have not met all guys who are attracted to fem guys obviously so I wouldn't dare say that's true for everyone.
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    Oct 16, 2015 9:05 PM GMT
    theantijock%20engage%20stalker%20reducti
    I may have misunderstood the assignment

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    men_who_swim_raft_tx700.jpg?8e0a8887e886

    Merman+Jax+at+Anabella+Hotel+Pool+Party+

    flambuoyancy
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2015 9:21 PM GMT
    swimjammer saidI had an interesting observation that I arrived at when I was trying to figure out why suddenly I'm not that interested in the guy I'm currently seeing.

    I've noticed that most gay couples tend to date within their same level of flamboyance. That somewhat explains to me the whole "masc looking for the same" mentality that I see on dating sites. How often have you seen a masculine guy date a really out there guy?

    For me, I can't date anyone gayer than myself. I'm not 100% masculine yet I'm not feminine either. The best way I can explain it is how a lot of Asians (not born in the US) are sometimes perceived as feminine when they are straight because of their mannerisms, which are totally attributable to their cultural norms. This partly explains to me why I'm usually attracted to Asian guys.

    Has anyone else noticed this? Or maybe you have some stories that prove this observation wrong? I'm thinking the majority of couples are within the same level of flamboyance.


    +1 yes
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    Oct 16, 2015 9:56 PM GMT
    David666k said^ OK but if you're fem chances are other fems wont be attracted to you, specially if they're asians as they're usually not attracted to other asians. You my friend are the exception to the rule.

    Your post forced to figure out how I'm perceived. Many people have referred to me as metrosexual way before I came out and I can see that. Most people just assume that I'm straight and some even suspect that I'm gay, but they don't want to say anything because they're afraid that they'll be wrong. Usually, when I tell someone their response is that they suspected. When I ask how they could tell, it's always my style that gives me away. They just say that I'm too put together. An attorney at the firm I used to work at told me that I was very chic. I had to google what that even meant!
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14385

    Oct 17, 2015 4:23 PM GMT
    I would never date a feminine guy, no thank you. Any effeminate fruitcake tries to hit on me, I tell them to get lost. Not interested.
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    Oct 17, 2015 4:54 PM GMT
    David666k said^ OK but if you're fem chances are other fems wont be attracted to you, specially if they're asians as they're usually not attracted to other asians. You my friend are the exception to the rule.


    I'm attracted to other Asians...
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    Oct 17, 2015 6:21 PM GMT
    I just have to say I've been an RJ member for several years and I think "Flamboyancy level and dating" is the best topic title I've ever seen.
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    Oct 17, 2015 6:38 PM GMT
    eagermuscle saidI just have to say I've been an RJ member for several years and I think "Flamboyancy level and dating" is the best topic title I've ever seen.

    Is that a facetious quip?
  • Felony84

    Posts: 40

    Oct 17, 2015 6:44 PM GMT
    I get what you're saying and there is probably some measure of truth to it, but it's more complicated than that. I'm sure there are masculine guys with feminine guys. Maybe not a football playing masculine neanderthal with a feminine flamboyant guy who is into fashion and glee. I've never seen that before. They have vastly different personalities and interests that are too wide to connect them.
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    Oct 17, 2015 8:10 PM GMT
    Swifterchris said
    David666k said^ OK but if you're fem chances are other fems wont be attracted to you, specially if they're asians as they're usually not attracted to other asians. You my friend are the exception to the rule.


    I'm attracted to other Asians...


    uhh, me too, like wtf?!
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    Oct 17, 2015 8:43 PM GMT
    swimjammer said
    eagermuscle saidI just have to say I've been an RJ member for several years and I think "Flamboyancy level and dating" is the best topic title I've ever seen.

    Is that a facetious quip?

    Nope! Just love the title!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 17, 2015 9:10 PM GMT
    Felony84 saidI get what you're saying and there is probably some measure of truth to it, but it's more complicated than that. I'm sure there are masculine guys with feminine guys. Maybe not a football playing masculine neanderthal with a feminine flamboyant guy who is into fashion and glee. I've never seen that before. They have vastly different personalities and interests that are too wide to connect them.

    This is a good insight. The last guy I saw (and the current one) are vastly different than I in many aspects except for a few. You would think after the first encounter that we'd simply part ways, however, the physical attraction is what compels us to see each other a few more times, I guess.
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    Oct 17, 2015 9:13 PM GMT
    roadbikeRob saidI would never date a feminine guy, no thank you. Any effeminate fruitcake tries to hit on me, I tell them to get lost. Not interested.



    Even "Hott"Joe? icon_lol.gif
  • Sincityfan

    Posts: 409

    Oct 18, 2015 1:13 AM GMT
    Not to derail the thread but,thinking that Asians are not into Asians is not unwarranted.

    There are threads that have been popping in/out/on this forum since it was launched with titles like, "are white guys not into asians?" "Any white dudes like asians?"
    "Why don't white guys like me(asian)?" one after the next.
    Black dudes do the same thing..not sure who does it more often though.
  • Sincityfan

    Posts: 409

    Oct 18, 2015 1:16 AM GMT
    No, but I do carry a:
    D-BagMeter_small_5_4.png
    to my blind dates.
    You have to be a level 18 douche for me to like you.
    You're only a 17.5 at most.
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    Oct 18, 2015 1:27 AM GMT
    David666k said
    swimjammer said
    I've noticed that most gay couples tend to date within their same level of flamboyance. .

    ^ Not true. Your theory would be the perfect solution for all the fem bottoms out there, but sadly fem are not into other fem but into masculine men. And only a few masc are into fem.


    This pretty much every gay guy is into masc men.
  • LostSailor

    Posts: 163

    Oct 18, 2015 2:23 AM GMT
    I'm about as masculine as a guy could get.
    I wouldn't think of dating or fucking a guy if he WASN'T fem.
    I'm not into macho manly men at all.
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    Oct 18, 2015 3:43 AM GMT
    Looks, a nice body and an education are my only criteria for dating. I don't give a damn if, as I've once herd,a purse is falling out of their mouth.

    BTW: I'm HIV neg, but I've dated other HIV positive men in the past. Friends and family called me irresponible. I called it love.

    Others may disagree with me, and that is their right to do so.
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    Oct 18, 2015 3:52 AM GMT
    Mesmer said
    Swifterchris said
    David666k said^ OK but if you're fem chances are other fems wont be attracted to you, specially if they're asians as they're usually not attracted to other asians. You my friend are the exception to the rule.


    I'm attracted to other Asians...


    uhh, me too, like wtf?!


    Some Asians, I'm telling ya. They give us "normal" Asians a bad rep. I don't blame the guys who approach me with the stereotype in mind. It's what they've been exposed to icon_sad.gif