F'ed Up again "sorry I got plans today"

  • glowstik

    Posts: 150

    Nov 01, 2015 7:02 PM GMT
    Sorry to say but I think I f'ed up again and need to figure out what's best and healthiest thing for me to do.

    I got attached to the idea of seeing the same guy since we've been able to see each other the last two sundays. I called him friday and he said he wanted to see me but then he went to a halloween party and drank after he said he wasn't going to.

    So I didn't get a reply from him til Saturday afternoon saying sorry he couldn't come because he drank and his friend was there so he took him to his house to sleep and not to worry because they are just friends.

    I texted him back once saying glad you're okay and how I realized we've let the credits run to the end in at least two movies. He said yeah, that's our thing..

    I asked him this morning if he wanted to do something today and few hours later he replies "sorry I have plans today icon_sad.gif."

    I feel like an idiot for taking the initiative three times for this younger guy (20) who said earlier I'm not ready for a relationship but maybe something will grow from our friendship. I don't know how to build a relationship texting and we live 30 mins away.

    Is it hard to just let them go? Is this why most dating guys are contacting a lot of guys all at once so you don't feel so bad when they fade off?
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 872

    Nov 01, 2015 7:30 PM GMT
    Look, the guy is signalling on all frequencies that he has got plans that do NOT involve you. This should be cluing you in mightilyicon_razz.gif

    Wish him all the best, and move on very swiftly.

    Consider the whole thing a story that neither you nor him really thought worth investing in. A 30 min. ride to overcome some geography seems to have stopped you both from pursuing a closer friendship. Should this be the case, there is really very little to mourn about!

    SC

  • glowstik

    Posts: 150

    Nov 01, 2015 7:53 PM GMT
    SilverRRCloud saidLook, the guy is signalling on all frequencies that he has got plans that do NOT involve you. This should be cluing you in mightilyicon_razz.gif

    Wish him all the best, and move on very swiftly.

    Consider the whole thing a story that neither you nor him really thought worth investing in. A 30 min. ride to overcome some geography seems to have stopped you both from pursuing a closer friendship. Should this be the case, there is really very little to mourn about!

    SC



    Ouch! Definitely thank you SC, just did that and it felt great. Thanks for telling me what I needed to hear
  • cacaracol01

    Posts: 76

    Nov 01, 2015 8:09 PM GMT
    Dude...you don't feel like an idiot...shit happens and did you have fun while you were with him? if you did, which you obviously did then just be glad you had fun and move on man! you're a good looking dude...he don't want you but I'm sure there are plenty of other fish in the sea that would be happy to hang out with...forget about him and carry on with yourself!! Thats just my opinion!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 01, 2015 8:54 PM GMT
    From personal experience if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be. Plus if it's in the stars, you might meet again some day. Usually the second time is a lot better since you already have some history together.
  • cacaracol01

    Posts: 76

    Nov 01, 2015 9:08 PM GMT
    nah....let him go and don't give it up to him again!!! make him suffer hahaha
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 01, 2015 9:41 PM GMT
    glowstik saidSorry to say but I think I f'ed up again and need to figure out what's best and healthiest thing for me to do.

    I got attached to the idea of seeing the same guy since we've been able to see each other the last two sundays. I called him friday and he said he wanted to see me but then he went to a halloween party and drank after he said he wasn't going to.

    So I didn't get a reply from him til Saturday afternoon saying sorry he couldn't come because he drank and his friend was there so he took him to his house to sleep and not to worry because they are just friends.

    I texted him back once saying glad you're okay and how I realized we've let the credits run to the end in at least two movies. He said yeah, that's our thing..

    I asked him this morning if he wanted to do something today and few hours later he replies "sorry I have plans today icon_sad.gif."

    I feel like an idiot for taking the initiative three times for this younger guy (20) who said earlier I'm not ready for a relationship but maybe something will grow from our friendship. I don't know how to build a relationship texting and we live 30 mins away.

    Is it hard to just let them go? Is this why most dating guys are contacting a lot of guys all at once so you don't feel so bad when they fade off?




    So you've seen this guy TWICE and you feel like you have a "thing" already? No man.....that's not possible. You know nothing about this guy yet. You need to sit back and chill out. If he's as interested as he says he is, he will call you. I would not contact him again unless he reaches out to you first. To do so will only push him away farther because it will make him feel chased. And we all know what we do when we feel chased.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Nov 01, 2015 10:26 PM GMT
    SilverRRCloud saidLook, the guy is signalling on all frequencies that he has got plans that do NOT involve you. This should be cluing you in mightilyicon_razz.gif

    Wish him all the best, and move on very swiftly.

    Consider the whole thing a story that neither you nor him really thought worth investing in. A 30 min. ride to overcome some geography seems to have stopped you both from pursuing a closer friendship. Should this be the case, there is really very little to mourn about!

    SC



    Right.

    Let the other guy make the next move if he is so inclined, but don't hold your breath. It would have been better if he had been honest, but some guys prefer lame excuses instead.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Nov 02, 2015 1:56 AM GMT
    I'd move along rather quickly... he flunks the "grounded" test in my book and I would be turned off enough not to ask him again. Other fish in the sea.. I'd move along.

    icon_cool.gif
  • RaulMoonPride

    Posts: 107

    Nov 02, 2015 2:18 AM GMT
    Radd said
    glowstik saidSorry to say but I think I f'ed up again and need to figure out what's best and healthiest thing for me to do.

    I got attached to the idea of seeing the same guy since we've been able to see each other the last two sundays. I called him friday and he said he wanted to see me but then he went to a halloween party and drank after he said he wasn't going to.

    So I didn't get a reply from him til Saturday afternoon saying sorry he couldn't come because he drank and his friend was there so he took him to his house to sleep and not to worry because they are just friends.

    I texted him back once saying glad you're okay and how I realized we've let the credits run to the end in at least two movies. He said yeah, that's our thing..

    I asked him this morning if he wanted to do something today and few hours later he replies "sorry I have plans today icon_sad.gif."

    I feel like an idiot for taking the initiative three times for this younger guy (20) who said earlier I'm not ready for a relationship but maybe something will grow from our friendship. I don't know how to build a relationship texting and we live 30 mins away.

    Is it hard to just let them go? Is this why most dating guys are contacting a lot of guys all at once so you don't feel so bad when they fade off?




    So you've seen this guy TWICE and you feel like you have a "thing" already? No man.....that's not possible. You know nothing about this guy yet. You need to sit back and chill out. If he's as interested as he says he is, he will call you. I would not contact him again unless he reaches out to you first. To do so will only push him away farther because it will make him feel chased. And we all know what we do when we feel chased.


    Agree, keep dating and do not be desperate, desperation makes guys flee. You dont feel a click with someone instantly, time is required.
    Let him look for you, if he is really interested. Hope everything works well with you.
  • Nhlakz

    Posts: 149

    Nov 02, 2015 12:24 PM GMT
    "HIS JUST NOT THAT INTO"...THINK we've all heard that line before...it difficult to get over a new fling..but sometimes it can be emotionally draining and theres more to life than someone whos not willing to give u their time.move on and dont let these affect how u look @ urself..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2015 2:35 PM GMT
    It sounds like you've taken the initiative and things haven't worked out. Perhaps it's time to move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2015 3:45 PM GMT
    He is 20. Guys in their 20s are kinda flaky. I don't think he sees you as a romantic interest. You try too hard. Move on and date someone else more matured your age.
  • FitBlackCuddl...

    Posts: 802

    Nov 02, 2015 3:47 PM GMT
    glowstik saidSorry to say but I think I f'ed up again and need to figure out what's best and healthiest thing for me to do.

    I got attached to the idea of seeing the same guy since we've been able to see each other the last two sundays. I called him friday and he said he wanted to see me but then he went to a halloween party and drank after he said he wasn't going to.

    So I didn't get a reply from him til Saturday afternoon saying sorry he couldn't come because he drank and his friend was there so he took him to his house to sleep and not to worry because they are just friends.

    I texted him back once saying glad you're okay and how I realized we've let the credits run to the end in at least two movies. He said yeah, that's our thing..

    I asked him this morning if he wanted to do something today and few hours later he replies "sorry I have plans today icon_sad.gif."

    I feel like an idiot for taking the initiative three times for this younger guy (20) who said earlier I'm not ready for a relationship but maybe something will grow from our friendship. I don't know how to build a relationship texting and we live 30 mins away.

    Is it hard to just let them go? Is this why most dating guys are contacting a lot of guys all at once so you don't feel so bad when they fade off?


    You are thinking about a one-to-one relationship with this fellow? If so, WHY? Wouldn't it be better...easier to just "go with the flow" and enjoy what chemistry you already have without having an agenda where it all has to lead?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2015 6:13 PM GMT
    From experience, I would just ask him what's up. It is so much easier than playing the demeaning "game." I've had a similar situation recently and because the issue was addressed, we are working things out.
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Nov 02, 2015 8:27 PM GMT
    If he really liked you then he would make time for you. Move on, there are other men out there. ;)
  • Oceans_of_Flo...

    Posts: 393

    Nov 02, 2015 9:53 PM GMT

    Keep trying. Young guys are like the T-1000; it takes a lot to turn them on, but once you do, they won't stop until she's dead.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2015 9:53 PM GMT
    laxwill10 saidHe is 20. Guys in their 20s are kinda flaky.



    That's rude to classify all guys that age as flakey. There are responsible, dependable 20 year olds and flakey 60 year olds. Age has nothing to do with it.