In a relationship and starving your partner for sex. WHY?

  • Apparition

    Posts: 3529

    Nov 27, 2015 3:44 AM GMT
    In a relationship and starving your partner for sex. WHY?

    This is for all the people in relationships that like having a bf, and you used to be sexual with them, but NOW you reject pretty much every advance, you dont have sex for a month or two at a time even though he wants sex regularly.

    Why are you doing this?
    How do you feel about your bf wanting a regular sex life like a normal person and you just pretty much ignoring his needs?
    Do you expect him to just go elsewhere, or do you just want him to suffer?
    Do you feel it is your responsibility to provide sex on a regular basis as part of the "job" as bf or do you think it is just okay to ignore him at every occasion because you like the rest of the relationship?

    We all know how the guys not getting enough feel. How do the guys NOT DOING THEIR JOB feel about it. What can we do to change the situation.

    -----
    (I'm not talking guys who are not putting out every other day, but the ones who pretty much have given up on sex while the partner did not)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 27, 2015 9:16 AM GMT
    its worn out to say; "someone deserves better
    the two should talk, or are they afraid of the out come?
    the one holding back could feel:
    hurt about something,
    could feel they want out of the relationship but are afraid
    stress; some personal junk, work issues
    feel their net worth is not as expected

    put that big college try and work it out, couples counseling.
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 874

    Nov 27, 2015 10:51 AM GMT
    Nope. Partnership ain't really a job.

    And if you do not feel like getting sexual anymore for a while, the only fair thing to do is to talk to your partner/bf, and explain that you simply do no feel like doing it anymore at this time. Tell him honestly if this has anything to do with him or if your sexual drive is simply not there.

    Consider checking it all with your doc ASAP.

    But let your BF know that whatever the case may be, you are not doing it at this time.

    Have decency to say that he should not be suffering, and that he is welcome to meet other dudes for some sexual release. Never allow yourself to be a cause of other people's suffering.

    SC
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 27, 2015 12:41 PM GMT
    pellaz saidits worn out to say; "someone deserves better
    the two should talk, or are they afraid of the out come?
    the one holding back could feel:
    hurt about something,
    could feel they want out of the relationship but are afraid
    stress; some personal junk, work issues
    feel their net worth is not as expected

    put that big college try and work it out, couples counseling.


    Can you explain the net worth thing?
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Nov 27, 2015 3:41 PM GMT
    I've run across couples like this. Surprisingly often. Usually it is an older partner who has just lost interest in sex. Some guys are just more sexual than others. There was a thread on here about how often guys beat off and I was surprised the range of the responses even from similar age young guys. Of course, some guys are pretty worthless and spend more time than is sensable playing with their dicks and some are truly busy with school or work or other interests and simply choose to use their time differently. But I think it also goes to need. Some guys as a relationship ages or they age just don't need it as much. They'd rather be doing other things. May be a physical issue or maybe mental. Some guys just need it less and it isn't a flaw. Some guys are over-sexed (we've all met those and it's kind of gross). But this is a sensative subject so they avoid the subject because they fear loss of their partner. Guys can't fake it. Sure, talking about it is needed but I'd suggest that like most couples issues, there is no good guy or bad guy. The love may be equal. And how they hangle it is unique to them.