Do you compete for dates with your friends?

  • Fireworkz

    Posts: 606

    Feb 05, 2016 10:54 PM GMT
    I've had a couple of interesting conversations this week.

    I have a couople of friends and one of them confessed to me that he doesn't go on dating apps because he doesn't want to meet guys who have dated or slept with my other friend (who is quite prolific on all apps).
    He also said that he feels he has to compete with my other friend. Both are black so I guess the dating pool is smaller and we may attract similar guys. But to me they are quite different in character and looks so I don't agree with this.

    In the second conversation I told a friend I had joined scruff but didn't really like it. He jokingly said 'thank god as I don't want any competition'. We then agreed to carve up London he has one half I have the other.



    I have the view that it is inevitable that you will meet someone who the other has slept with and it doesn't put me off. I don't see the world competitively like that.

    What is your view? Do you compete with your friends?

  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 873

    Feb 06, 2016 12:34 AM GMT
    Nope. I do not intentionally compete with anyone, let alone with my friends. Competition invariably happens if you choose to attend the same venues, use the same apps, etc..

    There is nothing necessarily wrong or bad about it at all. We all get to win some and lose some, too. And the life goes on, helping us all remember that this not ALL about ME alone.icon_biggrin.gif.

    SC
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    Feb 06, 2016 9:04 PM GMT
    Nah. You know we're all only separated by six degrees of penetration. icon_eek.gif

    Well, in PDX, probably more like one or two. icon_confused.gif

    Of course, different people have all kinds of attitudes, but at least in the "hook-up" crowd, it seems more like they're "taking turns" than competing.

    There's even a fairly standard scenario that goes something like: "Oh I don't think I'm hot enough for that guy, but maybe if you and I offered him a threesome?"
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    Feb 07, 2016 1:51 AM GMT
    mindgarden saidOf course, different people have all kinds of attitudes, but at least in the "hook-up" crowd, it seems more like they're "taking turns" than competing.

    Way back when I was in San Diego and active I had a friend who was a true size queen and whenever I had sex with a guy who was hung I'd tell tell my friend and let him know where to find him.
  • mar0302

    Posts: 273

    Feb 07, 2016 4:58 AM GMT
    I don't compete with anyone.. but I think it's normal that there will be a certain "recycling" of guys.. especially if you live in a small community.. it's not necessarily competition as much as it's trying to find the right person and there's no reason why someone that wasn't good for my mates would be good for me, or vice versa...
  • Fireworkz

    Posts: 606

    Feb 08, 2016 4:41 PM GMT
    Lumpyoatmeal said
    mindgarden saidOf course, different people have all kinds of attitudes, but at least in the "hook-up" crowd, it seems more like they're "taking turns" than competing.

    Way back when I was in San Diego and active I had a friend who was a true size queen and whenever I had sex with a guy who was hung I'd tell tell my friend and let him know where to find him.


    I don't think I or my friends would ever do referrals. It seems weird sleeping with someone you know your friend had.
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    Feb 09, 2016 2:02 AM GMT
    I am my bro's wingman. And, if that means that we have to take a guy home together and bang the $hit out of him tag-team-style, then a bro has to do for his bro that which must be done.
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    Feb 11, 2016 12:15 AM GMT
    I agree it's sooo awkward.
    But gay guys are sluts. Anyone you meet there's a big chance one of your friends already tapped that.