Hot guy at the gym HELP!!

• lucozonic
  
  Posts: 14
  
  
  Feb 11, 2016 1:38 PM GMT

  Ok so there is this really hot guy in my gym , he's a lot older than me (about 30-40 I'd say ) and I'm just 18. I really want to know if he's gay but I'm afraid to talk to him. He gives me the occasional nod of the head and held the door open for me a few times coming out of the changing room , I'm not sure if he's just really friendly or what? He goes 3 times a week and two of those times is with his gym buddy who looks late twenties I'd say so I don't know how they'd know each other. He is also always there on a Friday on his own , when im there too. Last Friday I was going to ask him to spot me but I chickened out as when I asked him how many sets he had left he kinda looked up from his phone and just said "two" in like a non interested tone of voice , I don't know if it was nervous voice or like get away from me voice . He also has a tattoo around his bicep and has shaved legs but a nice trimmed beard , not sure that's a gay thing or not? I will probably see him again tomorrow at the gym , should I ask him to spot me ? And what way should I go about it without coming across as creepy . He also seems to be really nice he puts all the weights back when he's finished , puts his ore workout packet back in the bin etc.. But I'm just afraid of rejection. Please some advice guys thanks

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  Feb 11, 2016 1:51 PM GMT

  The only way to find out is to ask...politely.

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  Feb 11, 2016 2:51 PM GMT

  Lol.
  
  Gym buddies meet at all ages.
  
  Spotting is not sexual at all ...
  
  Get talking sometime and hear about his wife or girlfriend.
  
  Then put it out your head.
  
  Far more important things to do than obsess over someone at the gym.

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• Destinharbor
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 3:05 PM GMT

  It sounds like he's a nice, normal guy, probably straight, with a workout buddy, and there to work out, not socialize. Like most of us. Stop obsessing. He's not there to find boys. If you really need a spot, just ask him "would you mind spotting me?" But only when it won't interupt his workout. I keep very regular intervals between sets and don't like to lengthen them and he may be that way, too. If he spots you, just say "Thanks, I'm Dave (your name)." If he's open to a new gym buddy, he'll say 'Hi" next time and maybe start a conversation. You'll find out if he's open to you as a bud but you'll still not know if he's gay. Be a friend first. But he may just not want his gym rhythm broken up with chatter. I don't. If he's gay and interested (and single), you'll know.

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• BloodFlame
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 3:37 PM GMT

  Destinharbor saidIt sounds like he's a nice, normal guy, probably straight, with a workout buddy, and there to work out, not socialize. Like most of us. Stop obsessing. He's not there to find boys. If you really need a spot, just ask him "would you mind spotting me?" But only when it won't interupt his workout. I keep very regular intervals between sets and don't like to lengthen them and he may be that way, too. If he spots you, just say "Thanks, I'm Dave (your name)." If he's open to a new gym buddy, he'll say 'Hi" next time and maybe start a conversation. You'll find out if he's open to you as a bud but you'll still not know if he's gay. Be a friend first. But he may just not want his gym rhythm broken up with chatter. I don't. If he's gay and interested (and single), you'll know.

  
  
  I feel this is the more logical answer. You should either try following this example or just be straight up and ask (when he's not preoccupied with his workout). I mean, even he says no, at least you'll know because obsessing won't help the situation.

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  Feb 11, 2016 3:45 PM GMT

  Destinharbor saidIt sounds like he's a nice, normal guy, probably straight, with a workout buddy, and there to work out, not socialize. Like most of us. Stop obsessing. He's not there to find boys. If you really need a spot, just ask him "would you mind spotting me?" But only when it won't interupt his workout. I keep very regular intervals between sets and don't like to lengthen them and he may be that way, too. If he spots you, just say "Thanks, I'm Dave (your name)." If he's open to a new gym buddy, he'll say 'Hi" next time and maybe start a conversation. You'll find out if he's open to you as a bud but you'll still not know if he's gay. Be a friend first. But he may just not want his gym rhythm broken up with chatter. I don't. If he's gay and interested (and single), you'll know.

  
  
  Listen to this.

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  Feb 11, 2016 3:49 PM GMT

  we are not the 10% Alfred Kinsey said we were. Gay men are 1-5% of the population. Even optimistic; its 1 in 20 he is gay.
  
  Gay or straight dosnt require him to want to know anyone at the gym.

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 4:23 PM GMT

  Thanks for suggestions guys , how could I start conversation and not come across as creepy ? Think I'm just go for it and see how it goes . Even if he is not gay he might be a good friend to have

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• Destinharbor
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 4:39 PM GMT

  lucozonic saidThanks for suggestions guys , how could I start conversation and not come across as creepy ? Think I'm just go for it and see how it goes . Even if he is not gay he might be a good friend to have

  
  If you see him away from his routine sometime, like at the water fountain or locker room, just stick out your hand and say "I see you here all the time. I'm Dave (your name)." I had a guy in the locker room do that to me last night. No big deal but don't expect that will be the start of your life together as a couple. Just be nice. Whatever you do, don't start being a pest while he's trying to work out. I also have a nice guy (straight, I assume) friend in the gym that I avoid other than to wave Hello to because every time i actually say something to him, he starts talking and never stops. I'm there to work out, not chat. That's one of the reasons I pay a bit extra for this gym-- it has very few women on the gym floor (they're in the dance room) and every time I'm around women on the floor, they talk and talk and talk and talk. Some guys, too, but not many. Don't be one of those guys.

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 4:41 PM GMT

  Destinharbor said

  lucozonic saidThanks for suggestions guys , how could I start conversation and not come across as creepy ? Think I'm just go for it and see how it goes . Even if he is not gay he might be a good friend to have

  
  If you see him away from his routine sometime, like at the water fountain or locker room, just stick out your hand and say "I see you here all the time. I'm Dave (your name)." I had a guy in the locker room do that to me last night. No big deal but don't expect that will be the start of your life together as a couple. Just be nice. Whatever you do, don't start being a pest while he's trying to work out. I also have a nice guy (straight, I assume) friend in the gym that I avoid other than to wave Hello to because every time i actually say something to him, he starts talking and never stops. I'm there to work out, not chat. That's one of the reasons I pay a bit extra for this gym-- it has very few women on the gym floor (they're in the dance room) and every time I'm around women on the floor, they talk and talk and talk and talk. Some guys, too, but not many. Don't be one of those guys.

  thanks for the advice , yeah I'll try not be that type ,then he will avoid me hahah

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 4:42 PM GMT

  robbaker saidthen shut up and go suck his cock already

  I wish , need to talk to him first though

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  Feb 11, 2016 4:47 PM GMT

  lucozonic saidOk so there is this really hot guy in my gym , he's a lot older than me (about 30-40 I'd say ) and I'm just 18.

  
  If you're "just 18," then why does your profile list you as 23? Whatever you do with this guy or anyone else, start by being completely honest with yourself.

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  Feb 11, 2016 4:50 PM GMT

  He is old enough to be your father and I extremely doubt wanting to start a relationship with someone more than half his age from the gym. So you are looking at it from a sexual viewpoint when he is likelu alrrady in a committed relationship and probably with a woman.
  
  There are "hot" guys everywhere. Don't freak out about it, and also remember that people go to gyms to work out, not score.

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 5:13 PM GMT

  MGINSD said

  lucozonic saidOk so there is this really hot guy in my gym , he's a lot older than me (about 30-40 I'd say ) and I'm just 18.

  
  If you're "just 18," then why does your profile list you as 23? Whatever you do with this guy or anyone else, start by being completely honest with yourself.

  didn't know how old you had to be signing up to the site so just put that age in just incase

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 5:59 PM GMT

  Relajado saidHe is old enough to be your father and I extremely doubt wanting to start a relationship with someone more than half his age from the gym. So you are looking at it from a sexual viewpoint when he is likelu alrrady in a committed relationship and probably with a woman.
  
  There are "hot" guys everywhere. Don't freak out about it, and also remember that people go to gyms to work out, not score.

  maybe I was just wishful thinking and got caught up in the whole thing thanks for the reality check lol

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• interestingch...
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 7:58 PM GMT

  Justme99 saidYou don't have a face photo, so we have no idea if you're even good-looking enough to date so called "hot guy. Furthermore, at 30-40 that guy is WAY TOO OLD for you if you're ONLY 18. You don't need to be dating someone that old. Date someone your own age; unless, you wanna date an old fart that's going to get ugly any second.
  
  You should just be yourself and also get new tennis shoes because New Balance ones are ugly. Instead, buy NIKE shoes. Your shorts are also too bright & hideous. Buy new shorts too while you're at it.
  
  That is all. You are now dismissed.
  
  
  

  What do you mean good looking enough? Its got nothing to do with looks, chemistry is way more important, If he is gay there is no reason why you guys couldn't date, depends on his hangup about age gap, he might like younger guys and if you are mature then what does it matter.
  I do however think that maybe you should ask him to spot you a few times and then once you know each other for a few weeks ask if he fancies going for a beer or something to eat because all that exercise has made you hungry, if he says no it maybe because he has plans, remember if you come across insecure or desperate, he will spot it a mile off, just be cool and friendly and yourself, if something happens it happens, the opportunity will present itself when the time is right.
  Has he looked at you a little too long before or while changing in the locker room? that will tell you a lot but some people are good at hiding their interest.
  Remember if something happens, be safe always, it only takes once to ruin your life.

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  Feb 11, 2016 8:10 PM GMT

  dude.....just say hi - and maybe even ask him a question about something specific that he is doing.
  
  "hey man, so sorry to interrupt, I noticed you were....whats the reason...blah blah..." then say "thanks a lot, sorry to bother you"
  
  I almost never get a crazy response - (although I'm usually asking because I'm REALLY interested in something specific about what they were doing) - most guys are pretty nice and happy to tell you about their workout.
  
  This opens the door to say hi again the next time you cross paths

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• interestingch...
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 8:24 PM GMT

  I'm far too good looking for you, sod off, hahahaha, just kidding, i'm average looking but never have any trouble attracting stunning guys, not sure how that happens but i'm not complaining, I have got a certain sexiness and charisma apparently, I can't see it myself but others obviously can.
  I don't think i'm anything special but I am unique.
  Anyhow I don't really date because it saves having your heart broken, been there and done that, took 3 years to get over it.

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  Feb 11, 2016 8:40 PM GMT

  
  
  I smell a web troll.
  
  

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• Destinharbor
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 9:00 PM GMT

  Boy, it seems that just as we get rid of some disgusting little web troll like Justme99, he's back in another fake profile. This one is neither bright nor funny nor interesting. Just a stupid little creep.

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 9:09 PM GMT

  Justme99 saidYou don't have a face photo, so we have no idea if you're even good-looking enough to date so called "hot guy. Furthermore, at 30-40 that guy is WAY TOO OLD for you if you're ONLY 18. You don't need to be dating someone that old. Date someone your own age; unless, you wanna date an old fart that's going to get ugly any second.
  
  You should just be yourself and also get new tennis shoes because New Balance ones are ugly. Instead, buy NIKE shoes. Your shorts are also too bright & hideous. Buy new shorts too while you're at it.
  
  That is all. You are now dismissed.
  
  
  

  who do you think you are 'you are now dismissed' hahaha I'd love if you said that to me in person , just stop posting negative comments on the internet and do something useful with you life you creep

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• lucozonic
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 9:10 PM GMT

  interestingchap said

  Justme99 saidYou don't have a face photo, so we have no idea if you're even good-looking enough to date so called "hot guy. Furthermore, at 30-40 that guy is WAY TOO OLD for you if you're ONLY 18. You don't need to be dating someone that old. Date someone your own age; unless, you wanna date an old fart that's going to get ugly any second.
  
  You should just be yourself and also get new tennis shoes because New Balance ones are ugly. Instead, buy NIKE shoes. Your shorts are also too bright & hideous. Buy new shorts too while you're at it.
  
  That is all. You are now dismissed.
  
  
  

  What do you mean good looking enough? Its got nothing to do with looks, chemistry is way more important, If he is gay there is no reason why you guys couldn't date, depends on his hangup about age gap, he might like younger guys and if you are mature then what does it matter.
  I do however think that maybe you should ask him to spot you a few times and then once you know each other for a few weeks ask if he fancies going for a beer or something to eat because all that exercise has made you hungry, if he says no it maybe because he has plans, remember if you come across insecure or desperate, he will spot it a mile off, just be cool and friendly and yourself, if something happens it happens, the opportunity will present itself when the time is right.
  Has he looked at you a little too long before or while changing in the locker room? that will tell you a lot but some people are good at hiding their interest.
  Remember if something happens, be safe always, it only takes once to ruin your life.

  thanks interestingchap , yeah tomorrow if the opportunity arises I'll try strike up a conversation and make it as natural / non creepy or seem not be nervous although I will be haha

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  Feb 11, 2016 9:21 PM GMT

  Justme99 said
  
  Don't be bitter simply because I look better than you and the rest of these dogs.
  
  

  
  
  No one likes you.

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• interestingch...
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 9:25 PM GMT

  Justme99 said

  interestingchap saidI'm far too good looking for you, sod off, hahahaha, just kidding, i'm average looking but never have any trouble attracting stunning guys, not sure how that happens but i'm not complaining, I have got a certain sexiness and charisma apparently, I can't see it myself but others obviously can.
  I don't think i'm anything special but I am unique.
  Anyhow I don't really date because it saves having your heart broken, been there and done that, took 3 years to get over it.

  
  
  you should show me your face, then. I am interested in seeing it. you may actually be hot and not even realize it?
  
  You should honestly date. You sound cool to me. What do you look like, physically, then?
  
  Hair/eye color? height? race?
  
  

  
  Hair colour is dark blonde but greying, height 6'2, blue/green eyes, white british, free spirited world traveller. Middle aged body though, don't look as great as I used too.

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• interestingch...
  
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  Feb 11, 2016 9:37 PM GMT

  well thanks but even my dicks not that long to reach across the atlantic LOL,

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