Platonic meetings.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 16, 2016 10:30 AM GMT
    Lately I've seen more ads from guys looking for guys to go out to dinner with, go to movies, basically be friends. Some say they're straight, and indicate it's hard to meet people to develop friendships with. Some who say their straight talk about hugging, holding, even sleeping together, but no sex. They just crave male touch and physical closeness, without the sex. I would guess some are gay too.

    This used to be a normal part of life, to have friends, even be physically close without it having to mean sex. Our society seems to have caused men to become more isolated. We're all busy, distracted and online. Friends are people we've never met. Intimacy means sex.

    Would you have a physical, intimate male friendship without sex?

  • Littlebear777

    Posts: 21

    Feb 16, 2016 10:51 AM GMT
    I sure would enjoy it! Someone to play video games with, watch movies and stuff, just snuggle up and be close, don't have to be sexualy, just be close comfortable friends! ^^
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 16, 2016 2:09 PM GMT
    I think it depends on the environment a guy has been around because between playing football and firefighting. A lot of us would sleep with each other and share a bed or cuddle and hug/ give each other massages without it being gay. Then there's people like my first roommate we were very close and like best friends but he didn't play sports or anything growing up and always thought everything would seem gay.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 16, 2016 3:18 PM GMT
    I know some people compartmentalize their acquaintances but when your NOT having the sex you think you want; sex seems to be always on your mind. I feel guilty undressing someone that is unavailable, not good at rationalizing things like this. So keeping things simple for myself.

    With an existing bf, partner, husband; your not looking outside for sex, hugging, holding, even sleeping together.

    The platonic thing just dosnt fit.

    If someone has skills i am all for a friendship. Likely the relationship is along the lines of something geek or legal/ financial related.
  • toastvenom

    Posts: 1020

    Feb 16, 2016 6:21 PM GMT
    wow, what a concept, two gay men meeting one another with some integrity and class, maybe the gay community can think outside the bath house, er sandbox
  • FitBlackCuddl...

    Posts: 803

    Feb 17, 2016 1:58 AM GMT
    strongbull saidLately I've seen more ads from guys looking for guys to go out to dinner with, go to movies, basically be friends. Some say they're straight, and indicate it's hard to meet people to develop friendships with. Some who say their straight talk about hugging, holding, even sleeping together, but no sex. They just crave male touch and physical closeness, without the sex. I would guess some are gay too.

    This used to be a normal part of life, to have friends, even be physically close without it having to mean sex. Our society seems to have caused men to become more isolated. We're all busy, distracted and online. Friends are people we've never met. Intimacy means sex.

    Would you have a physical, intimate male friendship without sex?



    Yes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 17, 2016 2:41 AM GMT
    Believe me....real straight men are not looking for other men to snuggle with.That is pure bullshit.There have always been straight men who had a lot of male friends even into their senior years and other married men who totally focus on their family and did not need that male companionship.For gay men it is different.So many of the comments you hear are from people who can't seem to make friends.I can understand that if you are a gay man living in North Dakota but making friends is pretty easy if you are a nice person.Why people have to post ads for friends I don't know.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 17, 2016 5:02 AM GMT
    strongbull saidLately I've seen more ads from guys looking for guys to go out to dinner with, go to movies, basically be friends. Some say they're straight, and indicate it's hard to meet people to develop friendships with. Some who say their straight talk about hugging, holding, even sleeping together, but no sex. They just crave male touch and physical closeness, without the sex. I would guess some are gay too.

    This used to be a normal part of life, to have friends, even be physically close without it having to mean sex. Our society seems to have caused men to become more isolated. We're all busy, distracted and online. Friends are people we've never met. Intimacy means sex.

    Would you have a physical, intimate male friendship without sex?



    Would, and have. In many ways, the most profound and rock-solid relationships of my life, as a matter of fact.
  • SilverRRCloud

    Posts: 875

    Feb 17, 2016 5:31 AM GMT
    I grew up in a sexually liberal environment. All of us showered in open showers, changed in locker rooms, frequented the local nudist beach, had countless sleepovers in the same beds, went skinny dipping at night with a few friends together or just with your 'bestie', etc.

    Closeness with some of these guys evolved into sexual relationships, too. And with the other guys, it just stayed what it always used to be: closeness.

    So, we all grew up and called our shots. Platonic, cuddling only sleepovers ended. You were trying to build up a successful career, keep your household going, hit the gym, and occasionally even get laidicon_biggrin.gif. Even if anyone wanted to have a good, ole 'cuddling only' sleepover, who on Earth had time for it?

    ---
    I agree though that a few guys out there do not define their sexuality in somewhat limiting terms of penetrative sex only. So, you do come across guys who do not want to have sex in our daily terms but would be happy to exchange the closeness and personal warmth without any penetration, or even without any orgasm whatsoever.

    Would I partner them up in one way or the other? Nope. But I believe that such people can find their happiness, too, if they meet people like themselves who are looking for someone similar to live their sexulities with.

    SC

  • FitBlackCuddl...

    Posts: 803

    Feb 17, 2016 9:41 PM GMT
    WickedRyan saidBelieve me....real straight men are not looking for other men to snuggle with.That is pure bullshit.


    I do not agree. From what you say, you'd be very surprised at the level of real warm intimacy a man seeks in another. Is a fact that a wife or a husband tends to become MUCH more open and affectionate with their best buds than their spouses, over time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 18, 2016 7:28 AM GMT
    With straight guys it doesn't mean full on cuddling necessarily. Just a relaxed attitude about physical contact and proximity. But there are times I would be fine with some cuddling/holding rather than sex. Who wants to just cuddle with me?!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 18, 2016 9:23 AM GMT
    strongbull saidLately I've seen more ads from guys looking for guys to go out to dinner with, go to movies, basically be friends. Some say they're straight, and indicate it's hard to meet people to develop friendships with. Some who say their straight talk about hugging, holding, even sleeping together, but no sex. They just crave male touch and physical closeness, without the sex. I would guess some are gay too.

    This used to be a normal part of life, to have friends, even be physically close without it having to mean sex. Our society seems to have caused men to become more isolated. We're all busy, distracted and online. Friends are people we've never met. Intimacy means sex.

    Would you have a physical, intimate male friendship without sex?



    Yes, I'm in one right now! One of my work buddies is a straight guy who enjoys the friendships of gay guys. He is everything you described!

    Oh, and he is definitely straight! I set him up with one of my female friends and she told me about the night she had with him. Based on her description of what happened, he's not in denial about who he is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 19, 2016 4:55 AM GMT
    strongbull saidWith straight guys it doesn't mean full on cuddling necessarily. Just a relaxed attitude about physical contact and proximity. But there are times I would be fine with some cuddling/holding rather than sex. Who wants to just cuddle with me?!


    Sadly, you're too far away . . . Be confident, be friendly, your platonic bud is out there. Good luck, bro!
  • rdberg1957

    Posts: 662

    Feb 19, 2016 12:03 PM GMT
    I've had several platonic friendships with gay men and straight men. The intimacy was less physical and more emotional. With one friend, we went to plays together, read poetry and the Tao te ching to one another. Many people thought we were together. Unfortunately, when he found a partner, he ended the relationship totally, stopped talking to me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 19, 2016 2:03 PM GMT
    rdberg1957 saidI've had several platonic friendships with gay men and straight men. The intimacy was less physical and more emotional. With one friend, we went to plays together, read poetry and the Tao te ching to one another. Many people thought we were together. Unfortunately, when he found a partner, he ended the relationship totally, stopped talking to me.


    Bummer. It might have been under compulsion from his just-acquired partner, who likely would have felt threatened by the depth of your relationship. It's unpleasant when these new people in a friend's life don't realize that the train their relationship is on is on a different track than the relationship his and mine is on.