Mar 06, 2016 4:25 PM GMT
Hi guys, I am new to this forum and I want to shout out a big hello to all of you. I am sorry in advance for the first lengthy message but I need your advice.
I am going through a relationship crisis, well a break-up is more accurate. I had been with my boyfriend for two years. He is an exchange student from another country and we met while taking the same classes. I am 25 and he is 35. This is my first relationship and it had been wonderful as we loved each other very much. We often talked about our future, how we would get married and have adopt many kids.
Fast forward, around last August, I had a one night stand with another person!! This was a horrible thing for me to do to someone I loved. Our relationship was a little rocky at this point and I just wanted the attentions. I cheated on my then boyfriend a couple more time after this with different people. I thought as long as I love him, these random physical encounters didn't mean anything (what a f***ed up thought I know). The last encoutner happened three months ago.
Ok, here is how the whole thing went down. He found the massages these guys and I exchanged on my phone and he flipped out. He was extremely angry and heart broken. I confessed right at that moment. We were on our vacation at a different city when this happened so I left to go back home by myself.
I have been so depressed after the incident. I have cried myself to sleep every night. I never meant to hurt him like that. I felt so stupid, guilty and ashamed for cheating on him. This will be a lesson for me and I will never ever do anything like this to anybody again.
About a week later, he called me saying that he had my stuff for me to pick-up. I came pick up my stuff and asked him if we could talk. I broke down and cried and apologized for what I had put him through. I didn't mention anything about me wanting us to get back together even though that was the only thing I wanted to do at the moment because he was still very angry and hurt. At the end, he wanted to give me a hug but I refused. He eventually left (we were having this conversation outside of his apartment) and I started to walk back to my apartment. When I was half way to my apartment, he caught up to me (I guess he was chasing me after I left). He said that what I did was a mistake and he forgave me. He also said that I have a great future in front of me and he insisted to hug me. It seems to me like he wanted me to move on. We departed after that.
I am quite confused about the whole thing. I deeply regretted what I did and I still love him very much. I am willing to do whatever it takes to have him back in my life. The problem is that he is going back to his country in a few months and I don't know if he wants to give me a chance considering all of the mixed signals he gave me.
What should I do?
I am going through a relationship crisis, well a break-up is more accurate. I had been with my boyfriend for two years. He is an exchange student from another country and we met while taking the same classes. I am 25 and he is 35. This is my first relationship and it had been wonderful as we loved each other very much. We often talked about our future, how we would get married and have adopt many kids.
Fast forward, around last August, I had a one night stand with another person!! This was a horrible thing for me to do to someone I loved. Our relationship was a little rocky at this point and I just wanted the attentions. I cheated on my then boyfriend a couple more time after this with different people. I thought as long as I love him, these random physical encounters didn't mean anything (what a f***ed up thought I know). The last encoutner happened three months ago.
Ok, here is how the whole thing went down. He found the massages these guys and I exchanged on my phone and he flipped out. He was extremely angry and heart broken. I confessed right at that moment. We were on our vacation at a different city when this happened so I left to go back home by myself.
I have been so depressed after the incident. I have cried myself to sleep every night. I never meant to hurt him like that. I felt so stupid, guilty and ashamed for cheating on him. This will be a lesson for me and I will never ever do anything like this to anybody again.
About a week later, he called me saying that he had my stuff for me to pick-up. I came pick up my stuff and asked him if we could talk. I broke down and cried and apologized for what I had put him through. I didn't mention anything about me wanting us to get back together even though that was the only thing I wanted to do at the moment because he was still very angry and hurt. At the end, he wanted to give me a hug but I refused. He eventually left (we were having this conversation outside of his apartment) and I started to walk back to my apartment. When I was half way to my apartment, he caught up to me (I guess he was chasing me after I left). He said that what I did was a mistake and he forgave me. He also said that I have a great future in front of me and he insisted to hug me. It seems to me like he wanted me to move on. We departed after that.
I am quite confused about the whole thing. I deeply regretted what I did and I still love him very much. I am willing to do whatever it takes to have him back in my life. The problem is that he is going back to his country in a few months and I don't know if he wants to give me a chance considering all of the mixed signals he gave me.
What should I do?
