I truly don't believe there's any justifiable reason, outside of a traffic crash or something else equally bad, to stand anyone up.
I've been stood up before, and it made me feel awful at first, then determined to not let the jerk who did that win. In short, I continued the date and made the decision to enjoy myself thoroughly. He doesn't know what he missed.
There's no doubt that it feels horrible to be stood up. Part of you wants to cry, part of you wonders what's fundamentally wrong with you and part of you wants to get in touch with your inner black woman, take a skillet (nicely weighted) and teach him some manners, Madea style.
Before you take a chain saw to his sofa though - consider this:
- A man keeps his word. A gentleman considers the needs of others before his wants and the wants of others before his needs and someone who's humble has self esteem to spare, but always considers others more than himself. How does the guy who stands someone up (lies in the most cowardly way possible) measure up to this?
- You deserve better. (I really don't think this needs explanation - more guys need to believe this and do something about it).
- Ask yourself in light of the above points the following questions:
1 - Would I invite a thief into my home? (Anyone who acts like this is a liar and has, in essence stolen your trust).
2 - Could I trust someone who gives his word and has no intention of honoring it?
3 - What has this person done to earn the PRIVILEGE of being in my life?
4 - Would I really want such a person around my family, loved ones, and my friends - the people to whom I really matter?
5 - What kind of a guy is this really, who does this without care or regard for the feelings of others?
It may be tough seeing him on a regular basis and not wanting to clean his clock, and he deserves every bit of a good telling-off. But the lesson that the world is going to teach him; that is imminent on the horizon and that he's blind or ignorant to because he's deluded himself into thinking there are no consequences in this world... that lesson is going to be a much more severe one than you can dish out and will be much more bitter and long lasting. It's called "alone".
Do yourself a favor... Be encouraged that there are awesomely amazing guys out there and be warned that you might just miss one if you're busy being angry or wasting energy on someone who legitimately does not deserve it.
Find your great guy or get ready to be found by him and enjoy the trip in the mean time