Should polygraph tests should be mandatory before marriage?

  • onlyawhisper

    Posts: 61

    Mar 30, 2016 1:51 AM GMT
    With divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?
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    Mar 30, 2016 2:07 AM GMT
    And those truth serum drugs as well.
  • mystery905

    Posts: 745

    Mar 30, 2016 2:32 AM GMT
    It won't help if you're marrying a psychopath who can beat polygraph tests.
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 1035

    Mar 30, 2016 2:32 AM GMT
    First, be aware that only "yes" or "no" questions are asked on a polygraph test.

    Second, be aware that polygraphs are ridiculously unreliable and easy to fake. I know this firsthand.

    But more to the point... why the fuck would you consider marrying someone who you don't even trust to tell you the absolute truth? Either you trust you partner without question, or you just say, "Next..."
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 1035

    Mar 30, 2016 2:35 AM GMT
    mystery905 saidIt won't help if you're marrying a psychopath who can beat polygraph tests.


    I'm not a psychopath, I'm a sociopath. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE, BITCH!!!!
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    Mar 30, 2016 2:37 AM GMT
    How about waterboarding too?
  • mystery905

    Posts: 745

    Mar 30, 2016 2:39 AM GMT
    bro4bro said
    mystery905 saidIt won't help if you're marrying a psychopath who can beat polygraph tests.


    I'm not a psychopath, I'm a sociopath. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE, BITCH!!!!


    https://ca.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20111026131455AAySHjf

    https://ca.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080707051720AA8bmYd


    Apparently both can beat polygraph.

    So either way you're covered!
  • Ariodante83

    Posts: 152

    Mar 30, 2016 2:43 AM GMT
    desertmuscl saidHow about waterboarding too?


    I love water sports!
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    Mar 30, 2016 4:20 AM GMT
    desertmuscl saidHow about waterboarding too?

    Anything goes in the quest for truth.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 30, 2016 5:09 AM GMT
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high...
    if the first time divorce rate is 50% that indicates half of the couples remain married for a life time. is the glass half full or half empty
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    Mar 30, 2016 3:18 PM GMT
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?



    You are making some pretty big assumptions here. First off why is a heigh divorce rate bad? Second, you are assuming that divorce is causes by some sort of dishonesty and presuming that in the cases where dishonesty is the issue that the person was dishonest about whatever the issue was prior to marriage. It is entirely unclear what problem you are trying to solve.


    The reality is that if you ask a person your five to ten questions but doubt them without a polygraph then you shouldn't be considering marriage with that person.
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    Mar 30, 2016 3:41 PM GMT
    I think if you distrust your partner enough to think that a polygraph is required to get the truth then you probably shouldn't get married.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 30, 2016 3:46 PM GMT
    Much of the rise of the private investigations industry is properly attributed to parents - and sometimes intended spouses' - checking out their beloved intendeds; it used to be almost routine in upper middle class circles and above, unless the pair and their families were long known to each other. I doubt if polygraph tests are appropriate - they inject a cold, mechanical aspect into what should be a warm, loving process - but discretion, in whatever form it takes, is always wise. Add to that a modicum of self-control, and you go a long way towards lowering both the divorce rate and the incidence of STDs.
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    Mar 30, 2016 4:31 PM GMT
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?

    I was introduced to polygraph "lie detector" tests during my military police officer training. Not because I would be administering them myself, but so that I understood their operation, their reliability and limits in law enforcement. I even took one myself as a demonstration.

    The manner of stating the question is important. The intended spouse should probably not ask the questions personally. An accusatory tone and verbiage might affect the response.

    Questions might be provided to the trained test administrator beforehand, who would reword them as necessary. And the intended spouse would not be present, no one but the test administrator.

    But the entire concept itself is inherently accusatory and confrontational. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with it myself. I always thought a good method, which I've used, is to just live with that person for a while if feasible, or at least spend lots of time with them.

    Phonies, and serious personality defects, usually become obvious over time. Although I know some people are very gullible, and spending extended time with the other person only makes them more their defenders and apologists, even when defects do become evident.

    I suppose that's why the US divorce rate is so high. Plus everyone changes over time. The person you married 20 years ago may not be the same person you're living with today.
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    Mar 30, 2016 4:39 PM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?

    . . .

    But the entire concept itself is inherently accusatory and confrontational. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with it myself.
    . . .

    Although I know some people are very gullible, and spending extended time with the other person only makes them more their defenders and apologists, even when defects do become evident.

    Rather! OTOH, I bet a good private investigator would come up w/ a boatload of fun stuff. A little cross-examination thrown in for good measure would be revealing as well. Were you trained in that as well??? How many poor devils have had to defend and apologize for you?
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    Mar 30, 2016 6:34 PM GMT
    mystery905 saidIt won't help if you're marrying a psychopath who can beat polygraph tests.


    Maybe we should have a separate topic to discuss Bill, Hillary, Donald and Ted.
  • Allen

    Posts: 341

    Mar 31, 2016 6:59 AM GMT
    MGINSD said
    Art_Deco said
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?

    . . .

    But the entire concept itself is inherently accusatory and confrontational. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with it myself.
    . . .

    Although I know some people are very gullible, and spending extended time with the other person only makes them more their defenders and apologists, even when defects do become evident.

    Rather! OTOH, I bet a good private investigator would come up w/ a boatload of fun stuff. A little cross-examination thrown in for good measure would be revealing as well. Were you trained in that as well??? How many poor devils have had to defend and apologize for you?


    WHAT is with you and your constant attacks on Art_Deco?
  • oldfart

    Posts: 328

    Mar 31, 2016 1:24 PM GMT
    If we knew the truth about our spouses at the start, there wouldln't be many marriages. Now that would drasticly reduce the divorce rate.

    Polygraphs have low reliability. Instead, think like an auditor and look at the evidence: You want to see the latest paystub, a recent bank statement and last year's tax return.

    Oh, and go with him for that STD test and inspect that report for yourself.
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    Mar 31, 2016 5:43 PM GMT
    Allen said
    MGINSD said
    Art_Deco said
    onlyawhisper saidWith divorce rates so high, I'm really starting to think it would be a good idea for engaged couples to have to undergo a polygraph test before they are allowed to legally marry. The test would be conducted by a professional, but each partner would get the chance to ask the person they plan on marrying 5-10 questions that they would like answers to, before making that commitment.

    It would be up to the couple to decide whether or not they want to proceed with the marriage based upon the results, but the test itself should be required by law in my opinion.

    Anyone else think this might be a good idea?

    . . .

    But the entire concept itself is inherently accusatory and confrontational. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with it myself.
    . . .

    Although I know some people are very gullible, and spending extended time with the other person only makes them more their defenders and apologists, even when defects do become evident.

    Rather! OTOH, I bet a good private investigator would come up w/ a boatload of fun stuff. A little cross-examination thrown in for good measure would be revealing as well. Were you trained in that as well??? How many poor devils have had to defend and apologize for you?


    WHAT is with you and your constant attacks on Art_Deco?

    As I've said before, I don't suffer fools gladly.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 01, 2016 12:51 AM GMT
    Even if polygraphs were reliable, marriage is a long road and what one party felt and was convinced in, the beginning, may change in the longer run, after a while.

    Not sure in the details, on how much a prenuptial agreement would help, but probably a lot more than entering marriage without it. That could be the only dose of protection one or both could take in the case of an ugly divorce.
  • mcbrion

    Posts: 305

    Apr 02, 2016 6:01 AM GMT
    If someone needs a polygraph to determine the future of their relationship, that doesn't say much about our own intuition and ability to really "see" the other person clearly.
    If we can't get honest answers from someone we supposedly like - or love - and our gut tells us they're hiding things, what would make you want to stay with someone, unless you're hard to talk to.
    I've always trusted guys I've dated to be themselves. And they have never failed to be exactly whom they are. If I'm paying attention, I will see clearly who they are. And if I have to test someone I'm dating, that in itself tells me that there is a lack of trust, and at that point, I ask myself, what has he done to make me think that? Is it him or is it me?
  • tennsjock

    Posts: 349

    Apr 02, 2016 9:42 PM GMT
    Interesting article, thought I would share:

    How the chance of breaking up changes the longer your relationship lasts

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2016/03/18/how-the-likelihood-of-breaking-up-changes-as-time-goes-by/?postshare=6211459049229689&tid=ss_fb

    breakups.png&w=1484
  • myrosebud

    Posts: 41

    Apr 04, 2016 3:03 AM GMT
    It would be an amazing feat if half of gay marriages survive a lifetime like straight marriages.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 06, 2016 9:44 PM GMT
    I vote for vasectomy.